Boyfriend Struggling Financially?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I have been dating almost a year. He’s a good guy, but I’m starting to question if this relationship is for me. My boyfriend is a truck driver. Recently him, and his step dad bought a truck. The truck has been having many problems so it has been in the shop. He hasn’t been working consistently in 3-4 weeks. He has no savings or anything. I’m also a single mother doing everything by my self, and I don’t make enough to cover my bills & his bills at the same time. And I feel as he expects me to, because he has fallen on hard times. What should I do?

[ohsheeT]

Do what your doing right know you have to think the way your thinking

And he should not put you in the middle of this or even ask you

He needs to look at the big picture. When the truck is in the shop he needs to find a part time job driving in the city for someone

He need define a couple delivery, things like Amazon. Or whoever in town play this situation that he's looking for a part-time job instead of sitting on his bed, wondering what he's going to do while the truck's in the shop he could be out making money.

I know in my city , there's all kinds of places like that would hire him because he has that license even a construction outfit and you could drive a water truck.. or ups or fed x

[HollyK21]

Unless you’re unhappy with the relationship in general then maybe it’s worth talking to him about all this before ending the relationship completely. You say he hasn’t had consistent income in about a month, so I’m guessing prior to that he was more stable financially. If this is just a rough patch for him with the truck being in the shop (which is also his main source of income), then I’d like to think that once the truck’s fixed things will go back to normal. But if he’s proven to be a lowlife prior to this whole truck thing then yeah, you’d be better off without him. I also wonder how he would respond if you just straight up told him you can’t afford both of your bills on top of expenses as a mom. If you think he would be receptive and not ask for money anymore then maybe try that route first before splitting up. If you already know he’d make an issue out of it then that’s not someone you should be with.

[Abbycado]

Break up with him. You are too young, especially with a child, to financially support someone unless, which seems to be the case.

[HawkPerception]

You have no obligation to support him financially. Obviously it would be NICE if you did, but it's not your responsibility. As you said, you have a kid, and that should be your priority. Giving them the best experiences and opportunities they can have. Letting them eat good food, etc.

Each partner is responsible for themselves and unless you agree to a traditional relationship dynamic where the man makes the money and the woman is the homemaker, that should be the way it is.

If your partner EXPECTS you to financially help him out, then that's an issue. He shouldn't be putting ANY pressure on you to help him pay for stuff, especially if he loves you.

[integrale77]

He shouldn't be expecting any help from you that's just wrong to put demands on your partner in a relationship. I admit I have accepted help off my girlfriend (she's a single parent too so similar situation) but I've not asked for help at any extreme level and only money I can pay back on my next pay day.

Right now I'm the one who's owed money but I'm not one to pursue to get it back she's asked me to work out how much.

I think you need to tell your boyfriend he needs to look for a new path for his employment to dig himself out of a hole.

[Asker]

Thank you for your advice!

[Zack-Bann]

He sounds like an honest man doing honest work (unless I’m missing something)


You can talk to him about it.
Tell him you’d do it if you could but you barely make enough for the kid as it is and he needs to figure something out if the truck is gonna be KOed for a long time


If all else fails you could walk away


But I wouldn’t be packing a bag preemptively.
He doesn’t sound like a lazy man and trust me many men are.
Plus not many will want a woman with kids.


Give him a fair and honest chance. And chose from there

[HighValue]

If you don't want to help him, don't ever expect any partner to help you either. In any long term relationship there will be a couple times at least where one partner loses their income. It shows who is in it for resources and who is actually there to be a PARTNER when that happens. Women almost always abandon men when it isn't convenient for them.

Also, as a single mom, you are lucky any man would be interested, and high quality men certainly won't be so I'd consider things carefully before making any decisions. If you tell him you are considering ending things, even if you end up staying together, it will forever damage the confidence in the stability of the relationship too, so it will eventually end no matter what after that point.

[In_Trance]

Have you had the actual conversation with him to confirm that you're suspicions are true?
Is the child his?

[Asker]

Yes we have had a conversation, and he have asked if I can help him with certain things.

[In_Trance]

So...

[jahaims]

Let him know you would help him if you could but you and your kid comes first obviously.

[Staximus]

It's not your responsibility

[Staximus]

He should have got a damned job