How much time needs to pass before it's OK to date someone new?

[Anonymous]

Is there a general rule?

[Summeroflove]

There really isn’t a limit it’s different for everyone. When you feel ready and you feel attracted to someone… The issue is not getting too carried away taking your time and taking things slow. I’m not saying a “rebound” is bad if it’s with the right intentions. Meeting someone new…

But what can happen is that people get too carried away too fast with someone new and jump into a worse relationship then the last. As well as if you’re not fully over someone you shouldn’t commit to someone new. Date? Sure. But not commit. Because it’s not really right to be with someone while still wishing you were with someone else. Especially if you would cheat or leave if the opportunity arose to be with your former partner for some people even partners…

So before it gets too deep. You need to make sure you’re over your past partner. Not get too carried away too fast…. You’re just starting dating again. It’s a new relationship. If you’re seeking the same relationship that you lost you’re going to be disappointed…. It’s a new person and a new relationship.

See that’s the other thing. People want to seek exactly what they lost. And become disappointed even resentful. It’s a new experience.

When the time comes. You’re really invested in someone new… That’s when you can take those next steps. But for now. All you’re doing is dipping your toes back in the waters again…

[HawkPerception]

There is no rule, and you should learn that life doesn't have many "rules" written in stone. Everyone processes things at different rates. What may take someone many years to get over might take another person a few hours to process and get over. Just date whenever you feel you're ready and don't let your baggage or trauma from a past relationship affect a fresh one.

[DishLady]

in my opinion depends on how long you were together.


Also depends if you were “just dating” or “just seeing each other” or if you were in an actual relationship.


For example, December I shook off a bad guy. Yesterday my standard energy was back to normal and a guy with the right energy approached. Probably nothing will come of it, but the fact that the energy was there and the guy picked up on it was a sign that I was ready. It was also a boost to lmk I’ve still got it and don’t need to be slumming or waiting around for Mr. Wrong to get his act together. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Greek_goddess_Iris]

Depends on a few things. If you were just dating, then no waiting period- if he couldn't commit then it's not your problem. Just don't fall in love with the first person you meet. If you were married - you need to wait at least a year to reflect and recover. If you were in an abusive relationship, whether it's dating or marriage, wait two years - you don't need to just get over a person, you also need to heal first or you will make the same mistake. And once you start dating, you follow that 90-day rule.

[ohsheeT]

Ok first this world is about you and you need to be happy.

Depending on why you broke up how long you were together, I mean, you do what you want to do. You don't have to feel guilty. You don't have to feel remorse. You don't have to feel anything except for there's a reason why you want to date somebody so good and have fun. Life is an experience. The reason why you We're going with somebody and broke up. It was for you to learn something. Did you learn it? If not , then the moment you jump into this one , the odds are you're going to to go through something almost the same. But the outcome will be the learning experience that you were supposed to learn

And are you wanting to date? Because this person asks you, or is it? Because you feel lonely

[Finchie40]

There is no rule , it just comes down to when you feel ready , only you can make that decision , no one else can make the decision for you , if your ex was a selfish POS person , then moving on from them with someone else. shouldn’t be an issue , Some relationships end before they officially end , why there are so many affairs and cheating going on , the second someone cheats on their partner , that relationship is pretty much already over , because if you actually loved the person you are with , you wouldn’t be cheating on them or investing your time into someone else period . So moving on fast from some exes isn’t a big deal , if they treated you poorly. But in some cases it’s wise to take time to get over your ex before pursuing someone else , you don’t want to bring your dirty laundry to someone that might actually be amazing to you. It’s the respectful thing to do

[OlderAndWiser]

You are ready to start dating when you can spend time with a new partner without comparing them to your ex and without thinking about the new budding relationship as revenge on your ex.

[AviatorTom]

There is no rule, but you might want to wait 15 minutes. 😏

[coachTanthony]

A week or right away because let's face it most have left the relationship mentally a long time ago.

[ManOnFire]

I feel like whenever women ask this question it's because they really want to start dating someone right away after breaking up but don't want to feel guilty about it.

[Zack-Bann]

There is no rule at all


But the general best practice is to wait at least 10% of the time you spent in that relationship


Not for the social reasons but to take a personal breather


I know a girl who got out of a 3 year relationship and started dating a guy after less than 2 weeks


She justifies it by saying that she’d been mentally done with her relationship for 6 month Before ending it but that’s a flimsy excuse


The truth is she’s carrying all the baggage of those 3 years into the new one because she didn’t take two seconds to unload and figure out how to be single again

[godfatherfan]

Depends on how long you are together and if you are married or just dating. If I date someone only a month or two, I am on looking for someone new the same day we break up. When I got divorced after 25 years together, I expected at least 6 months before she dated. I, of course, didn't know she was already screwing someone else while we were married.

There isn't a set time. But there is a thing called respect. The longer you are with someone, there should be time to at least reflect and determine if you are ready to start dating again.

[Purpleronnie]

What makes you believe there is a general rule on time that could apply to everyone regardless of circumstances? , that would be absurd.


Here are some general advice though


# if your dating someone new to get over someone else , your outsourcing your recovery so don’t date on the rebound or for distraction to how you are feeling emotionally.


# know what you are looking for / what you don’t want and but don’t be over critical , perfection isn’t the point , so know , roughly speaking.. don’t just “see how it goes “you will usually always end up somewhere you don’t want to be !


# your life should be completely functional , constant and generally happy before inviting someone else to be part of it … dating should add value to your life , not provide structure.. if your emotions or self worth are in question then pause ,


When you’re ready after, THATS the time when it’s OK to date / meet someone else.


Good luck ☘️☘️

[McLlovin]

Only you know that. But ill tell you the indicators that say you are ready to date again.

1. You’re ex isn’t in your life at all. Not as a friend or any kind of contact whatsoever. The reason is very simple. If you had to choose your new relationship or your ex as a friend what would you choose? There in-lies the real issue. If you choose your ex you’re not over them, and if you choose your new relationship then why delay why not ditch the ex completely and move on.

2. You have no emotional baggage. You’re not holding on to their number in your phone. It’s deleted. You don't have any property they gave you with in reason. If its a car.. cmon lol its ok to keep it its a need. But you get the idea.

Those are some major things that says you’re ready. But ultimately you know when you’re ready, just be honest to yourself

[McLlovin]

Notice i didn't give you a time table. Because the heart knows when its ready. Out of the heart flows the issues of life

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

It can't be quantified or measured by us, even loosely, because only you can know what feels right, no one but you has access to your feelings, to how much you've digested life events, to how ready or not you are.

Some people can need years to recover from a 2 weeks relationship, some people can need a month to recover from a relationship lasting years. Because feelings are complex and aren't felt the same for anyone, internally.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I don't know but I think my dad started this chick like a couple weeks after he broke up with his ex. I think each case is different but when your younger you should definitely take some time to sort your feelings and perspective out. Find a middle ground again.

[Miristheiss]

If you were planning on living the rest of your life with them and they suddenly ended it and devastated you it may take 6 months to a year.

If you have been checked out for months and already talking to new people because you are totally done with your relationship you can date immediately.

[RavVid]

When you think you can genuinely and be interested in the person you go on a date with. It isn't fair if you are making negative comparisons with the ex, cause it isn't a genuine date.

That seems to be 6 days for some and 6 months for others. I don't believe there is a general number of hours that must pass by.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

As for dating when you are ready to date you are ready to date & best way to get over someone is to get under someone new. After a breakup I usually as a rule I usually give it seven to ten business days. Life moves on & so should you.

[Staximus]

You can't just say one answer for all situations. If your husband or wife died, or you got a divorce, or broke up with a long term boyfriend or girlfriend, or just got out of a short term relationship, then there are different answers according to different people for all these different situations.

[Anonymous]

No. Because after one woman it f***ed me up for over a year. You know when you're not over someone. And it's asking for trouble to date someone when you're not over someone. You owe it not only to yourself but to them to go into a new relationship with a clean slate

[Nikki1989]

There are no rules for that. I crossed that bridge on the same day once. Take advantage of the opportunities that come your way, as life is fleeting.

[Twodogs0525]

If you're on a date with someone new but have your ex on your mind while out or are comparing the new person to your ex, you're not ready.

[Lliam]

There's no time like the present.
Seriously, there is no general rule. It's whenever you feel ready to move on with life.

[lightbulb27]

yes, process the emotions and issues, get it emotionally behind you, start over.

otherwise, dragging the past into the present.

[lilBigPotato]

There's no rule, whatever works best for you... But dating someone new can help to get over the last one.

[MasterKS]

@lilBigPotato i second.

[MrChinaski]

My best was -3 days. I married her and we have two kids.

[exitseven]

I would date somebody the next day if I had the opportunity.

[strateguy632]

It is OK as soon as you send (or received ) the break up text. In my opinion, a lady who might be pregnant should wait, to be sure she isn't, so her kids won't be like cartman who didn't know which was his father.

[Phoenix98]

There's no concrete amount of time it just depends on the individual and whenever they are ready to.

[dragoblack]

When you actually take time to process your traumas and overcome them, before they turn into self-sabatoging dating habits & insecurities.

[UrLoveMocha]

I don’t believe time is a factor tbh… I think it’s all about if you’re READY to date..

[queenofcardio]

I don't judge. Some people move on the next day

[MasterKS]

@queenofcardio spot on.

[ChaseBee]

It depends on a lot of things: age, time you were dating and how serious you were. I have needed from a week to a few months the after relationships ended. I think the general rule might be one week for each month you dated guy again that is a general rule.

[LiamJHayden]

None. I am not passing up a potentially awesome lady because the last one decided yesterday that she is no longer interested.

[molonski2]

Personally , I have no problem with straight away and start it slow , as I don't believe you can put a time on it.

[Ironco]

One day, 5 years, everyone is different... no set rules here.

Do what you think is right...

[EmmaMary]

To the very best of my knowledge there is no hard fast rules regarding time etc.

[NathanDavis]

no rules...

just do as it works for you... and whoever dates you

[Pterodon]

When you’re ready. It depends on depth of feelings involved in last relationship. Some take years to get over others only days

[dudeinohio]

None. I've had a new first date a week after I went through a breakup.

[Likes2drive]

Not sure if there’s a general rule I just think it’s when you feel it’s time which would probably be about six months

[yulbsari]

Whores and sluts (male and female) don't care. They're driven by animal instinct and a broken childhood.

[itsannalee]

Within a minute if you are already healed.

[zombiewoof]

No rule, when you want to go out with the person that asks, or just ask someone

[leva543]

As long as you are comfortable and never miss the chance.

[Anonymous]

To the poster I was going to say a whacky silly thing but I don’t know if I should

[robocop666]

If you date a woman after her boyfriend broke up with her you can get a fist fight with him.

[Anonymous]

No. It depends on you. What do you feel?

[RubyRed12343]

I would go for a whole day honestly.

[slatyb]

No less than 15 minutes.

[Dargil]

No rule and no time.

[Dargil]

There's a very different informal rule for when to start dating after the death of a spouse. Usually it has to be more than a year.

[Dargil]

My father waited a year and a half. He knew the woman but they had no relationship until it started up a year and a half after my mother died.

[AgentG111]

As in? Break up divorce death cheating?

[kaucky1]

not let any time pass but rather hide

[Anonymous]

I don't know, I never had a date.

[khyalove6]

Maybe wait a few months

[MasterKS]

Follow the guts mostly.

[Tigress1039]

1 year

[BADGER44]

1 hr

[msc545]

1 day

[ABC1x1x]

11...

[In_Trance]

no rule. You do you

[Daytoday79]

It varies by person

[Anordinaryguy123]

3 days are enough