Everyone wants an old school love life, but no one wants to put in the effort, why?

[Anonymous]

I know in some places, discrimination is still alive on skin colour, religion etc.
But keeping those aside.
I can tell men want it, ready to put in that effort.
I can tell women want to do it too.
But why don't they meet up and start those efforts.
But in my perspective they cross each other everyday but no one wants to get scammed.
Men are scared that the women will say something"we are just friends" or rejection

Women are scared of crime against her will.
Even if she knows him more than that.

Or just too many options through apps (those apps are only good for good-looks) an avg man never finds someone on that (very rare).

[Zack-Bann]

Some people do


Problem is they’re rarely single


Because an old school love life is a long term commitment


Whenever I meet a woman that wants exactly what I want (not fully “cook my meals” old school, but sill fairly classical) she’s always already seeing someone


Because they are few and far between and generally more desirable they will be swept up early on and their partners will not likely let them go easily


Best you can do is embody the characteristics that you value and keep on meeting people until you get lucky

[HighValue]

Most women are morally disgusting, repulsive people that offer little if any value to a man's life at all, but the MAJORITY of them will make a man's life worse, not better. Why seek out someone that is just a source of stress and problems? Mostly just a bunch of hypocritical parasites that offer no value in a relationship.

[PeachyPie93]

Everyone now is selfish and not willing to trust or take a chance..
Or they are retarded Redpill dudes or woman who think being hoes is empowering..

[DishLady]

If they don't want to put in the effort then they're not serious about wanting it.

[RavVid]

Effort versus reward is a big factor among the ones you listed. You are right that both men & women would like a happy long marriage but it is impossible to ignore divorce rates.

If building a life is now off the table, then the only sensible option is to maximize the rewards and minimize the effort.

[LiamJHayden]

Putting aside the two absolutes of "everyone" and "no one" as there are exception to both, there are a few reasons:

One might want it, but the other person might not want old school romance or even monogamy

Despite the protestations of many, if the ultimate goal is just sex, for a lot of people that is easy to get and requires minimal effort. Why pay full price when there are so many sales going on.

Even if both want it, one might put in a lot of effort and have it go nowehere. That is discouraging, and some just give up at that point.

And of course, even if all works out initially, there is the spectre of no-fault divorce where one partner "gets bored" and cheat, suffering no penalty for violating the marriage contract.

[MrChinaski]

There are so many possible ways into this that I'm not going to take but... but to offer one factoid I find quizzical: 20 somethings are more risk averse with IRL interactions now than they were when I was that age. There's pretty solid survey evidence (if you consider that surveys are evidence of anything ever). I'm not even going to speculate why that is.

[aceleon]

easy

no one likes putting effort into things especially ifthey don't trust it will work.

[raccoon71]

It is always simpler to take, more work to give. There is always a balance, but not everyone is developed the same. So. The balance is determined by the couple, when one loses balance they both faulter.

[Anonymous]

Everyone wants to put in the effort but I don't think they know what to do. I was just having sex until I met a guy I wanted to be with.

[Anonymous]

Laziness. People don't even want to talk to each other; they would rather send a text.

[beefcakebradybatson]

I'm handsome and would work to keep a relationship with a hot broad.

[Zionne]

we're evolving