Almost 30 but not ready to settle down?

[victoriaxoxo]

I never had this feeling of wanting to settle down. Never had baby fever. Never wanted to get married. I thought it will all change as I get older but the older I get the more I feel like I prefer living alone. It’s strange because at almost 30 I have both noticed a dip in the amount of men that pursue me and also an increase in the quality of the men who pursue (have their houses, good careers, want to settle down), but even then none of the pressure makes me want to actually settle. Some of these guys are objectively rather great and I feel like I should want to settle, but the feeling in my chest is one of feeling smothered.

Just to add, I’m not even someone who dates lots or goes out. I have my hobbies, my books and my friends and I feel like finding a man or having kids would disturb the lifestyle I want for myself. Only thing that sort of worries me is of course the dating pool drying up completely and me changing my mind when it’s too late. But then again what am I supposed to do if I genuinely just don’t want to?

[Anonymous]

What do you mean what are you supposed to do? No one can define your life but you and God. And since you didn't include God in your question I'm assuming you don't care about his opinion.

So why is any of this a problem? You're afraid in a couple decades you're going to change your mind and at that point it'll be too late? Because unless that is youworry I don't see how any of this is a problem. As I said, you have to define your life. The reality in life is most people are going to judge you. And they're going to do it whichever side of the line you walk on. So why give a 💩? You just do you.

[Staximus]

If you find a guy who's looking for a serious relationship and you tell him that you never want to live together, he's going to no longer consider you serious relationship material. Basically no guy is going to consider you serious relationship material because you never want to live together with him. You're going to be the good time girl or the side chick forever because you can't get serious enough to take the next step like an adult.

[Staximus]

While you're having your "alone time" until the weekend, your fuckboy is going to have a girl over at his place all week

[Staximus]

And that is exactly the kind of guy who is interested in the kind of relationship that you want

[Staximus]

People who are never around and can't get serious in a relationship will be replaced

[Staximus]

When you're 65 and all alone with your cats you're going to wish you pulled your head out of your ass and got serious about relationships

[In_Trance]

I think for the most part people will respect your choice if you "don't want to"
Just keep in mind that if and when the day comes that you do want to, you'll have to respect the fact that others might not want to.

[Berethor]

Well you already know that when you change your mind it’s going to be too late.

[DryGermanGuy]

Sooo… according to your picture, you’re cohabitating with a bear, then? 🐻🤔

[jahaims]

You aren't emotionally healthy enough to understand what a relationship is. Sounds like you have avoidant attachment

[CuriousMufuxka]

Hey, always be yourself is my motto. This journey of life is mostly traveled down one's own lane..

[Anonymous]

@victoriaxoxo so Victoria, clearly you should keep having a good time - you're in your 20s prime
And didn't that rhyme 😋🤭🤭😈😈😈

[Anonymous]

OK then.