How do I cope with loneliness when men only want casual sex from me?

[Anonymous]

I can’t make any guy stay. If we’re just talking they’re not interested. If I invite them somewhere they’re always busy, if I sleep with them, they’re interested for a week. The guy I slept with, it feels like he found someone new and stop texting me. I felt really bad, and found another one night stand, but I didn’t feel anything during sex. I didn’t want to kiss him, and wished it ended faster. But I still waited message from him the next day, and didn’t receive anything. I texted him ”hi” and he didn’t reply and I deleted our conversation. I thought it will help me forget first guy, but it didn’t. I feel even worse. I don’t know how to find partner since guys don’t even want me for sexual relationships. And I get tired from it too. But if I could find someone who just liked spending time with going somewhere together, it would be fine. But I think I started giving myself to guys to get love in return, but didn’t receive anything.

[HollyK21]

In all honesty hun, it sounds like you need to take a real break from men, work on finding yourself again, and then re-explore dating in the future. You struggle with loneliness, which probably leads to depression and/or any other mental health issues that you think the right man could fix but that isn’t the answer. In fact I’m not sure if you know what a good man looks like anymore, it’s become a process of giving any good looking, seemingly nice guy a chance only to wind up being used, ghosted or both.


You may not realize it, but each time you face this disappointment, it chips away at everything: your self esteem, sense of self worth, your morals, your values. When a man has nothing to offer, all he’s gonna do is take, and eventually you’ll have nothing left to give. If a great guy walked up to you right now, ready to invest, you’d come with all kinds of baggage that you should’ve taken time as a single person to address and unpack first.


You should consider therapy, so you can get to the bottom of where all this loneliness started, and work through that. Understanding yourself helps you to better understand what you’re looking for and not to even give men a chance if they aren’t aligning with it. Like these guys shouldn’t even be making it to the bed if you see the signs.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Holly said it better go with Holly's advice

[HollyK21]

Thanks Chico, she isn’t replying to anyone but I hope she reads our feedback and considers it at least lol

[ChicoFromThe305]

Yea it seems we wasted our majestic words

[Anonymous]

I know this.

I was told: stop dating men.

Come back to yourself. And then start slowly. If you don't want to have sex day no. You needn't to explain. The man musst accept it. Take care of yourself. Of you don't want to be the f-toy then say no.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Well the more you have casual flings the emptier you will feel, cause the truth is you weren't suppose to give it up, it's the way to filter out the bad men that want to use you for sex but you gave it up, they gave you up and now it might complicate things with men that want something serious

[whosnumber_1]

I want to give you a big hug. What kinds of activities and things are you interested in?

[Nikki1989]

Many men have little else to offer, which is why things are the way they are. It's a reflection on them, not you.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Yeah, it don’t work that way. You made yourself easy and guys will just use you if you let them

[jahaims]

Have value other than being a warm hole