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Guy I know mutual people, texted me asking if I was going line dancing. We ended up having a really fun time dancing. When I left for the night, I told him he should come hang out in my city sometime, and he asked what we'd do. I told him we could grab a drink or dinner.
Within 20 minutes of me getting home, he texted me saying: "Let me know the specifics of when your thinking of hanging. I would be down for that."
I texted him that night I'm available this weekend, gave him my address, so he could park since there's many places within walking diatance, then I said "Whenever"in case he had plans.
After 30+ hours of no response, I didn't give "specifics " so I sent a 2nd text, saying "Sat 9am, free yoga in the park if interested. Or Sun after 3pm I'll be round. I live in town, all walking distance."
After 12 hours he's gone "Radio Silent" Why text that you're down after I gave specifics then leave me on "read"?
The last time we hung out prior to dancing he showed interest , teased me and asked who I was texting, this was weeks prior.
Society has increasingly become more fake n flaky!
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
Did you post on here not long ago about getting mixed signals from this mutual friend because when you go out, he shows signs of interest but once the night ends, he’s not acting the same? I may not be recollecting the situation verbatim and that may not have been you, but if it was then my main point in bringing that up is just to say that maybe you should stop giving this guy attention altogether. If that wasn’t you I spoke with, I’d probably still say the same. I don't know what it is about going out and having a few drinks but that seems to bring out the flirty, outwardly interested side of some guys. Then sober, you’re seeing where they really stand.
To be fair, this could be a thing to where he wasn’t expecting you to suggest this weekend. Regardless though, he could at least say something and it’s been days. You will probably get some excuse for this behavior as to not make things awkward when you hang out again with the friend group, but in all honesty I would just shut that door for good. Don’t discuss this situation or your feelings about him with any of those mutuals, because you don’t need any middle men reprimanding him or making things more messy than they already are. My takeaway from this is that he enjoys those tipsy, flirty nights with you, he may find you attractive to some extent as well. But he’s got no intention of actually putting in the work to pursue something, and he’s demonstrating that with his silence alone.
Okay, point taken. In all honesty though, it wasn't a tipsy nighy of drinking. We line danced and each had 1 drink. Yes, I am closing the door. I dont understand i casually mentioned comming to my town, to hangout, not a date. The fact that he texted 20 min after, asking for specifics of hanging out then stayed he was down, was bizarre. Why not let the offer fade out, why put forth interest. Then i gave specifics and he dropped off. Its extremely rude and annoying!
Who’s to say he didn’t pre-game before the line dancing? Even if not in this case, was drinking involved in the others? Because if so, then I think that says a lot about who he is. He enjoys those nights with you while out with friends, then the next day it’s like a complete wash and he’s not pursuing you at all. I personally wouldn’t take into account anything he does the same night he’s in your face, because that could be him under the influence. Sometimes drinks are strong, or he doesn’t have the highest tolerance, I really feel like there’s something about his state of mind while out vs the next day. But I agree, I’ve been there with guys who act like that and once you see the signs, it’s better to stop giving them the time of day. I wouldn’t give him any more opportunities to lead me on or disappoint me if I were you.
Yes of course, he was a casual friend at the most. I wasn't interested in dating, was a little curious. That's why im usually friends with men first, because if they can't even be a decent friend they won't be a good partner long term. Maybe booze was involved, pre gamed etc.. either way, it doesn't matter because no answer is an answer. I dont center men in my life. The door is closed, im not gonna block him on social media or his #. Starving stupid connections such as this is the only way. Thanks
I could’ve sworn that my original comment said he would most likely reach out either the day before or day-of, because I had a strong feeling that’s when he would reach out! Smh, this happened to me in the past. You made the right choice by ignoring him, I feel like those sort of men want you to chase, they enjoy the attention but have no intention of doing anything with it. He can’t be the full ghosting a-hole he is at the core without risking ruffling feathers within the friend group, so he avoids that. But it’s evident what sort of man he is based off this behavior alone, and that is one who’s best avoided. This is most likely why he’s single in the first place, bullshit mind games and being too grown for them.
lol so you just assumed w out asking him if things were ok that he was a jerk, an asshole or something like that. Now you’re going to play games when you aren’t even sure if that’s what he was doing. Now I see why you’re still single at that age. Grow up. Your clock is running out. You don’t have time to be playing games. It’s possible yes he was playing games, but you doing the same doesn’t make you any better. If you find out he was then you walk cause you don’t have time for the nonsense.