Why is he hiding his committed relationship and joking about it at work?

[sadrose]

A guy in our office is denying he is in a committed relationship in front of me. Rather he is going on making jokes about his current relationship status. He is even telling others that they should make fun of his current relationship status in front of me. Why is that?

[HollyK21]

It’s definitely confusing if he denies a reality that people already know about. While he isn't successfully keeping it a secret, his joking shows he wants to project a single persona at work. I think people sometimes do this to flirt, seek attention, or compartmentalize their lives — even if they suck at it. I people who do this, in my opinion, is because they’re mentally trying to detach from a person or relationship before having the courage to actually do it. In any case, if his behavior makes you uncomfortable, confused, mislead, whatever, then the best solution is distance. Keep things super neutral, short and solely work-related, leaving no room/opportunity for him to pretend he’s single. You don’t need him flirting, giving excess attention or anything you believe he shouldn’t be doing as a taken man.

[sadrose]

So basically he is trying to get rid of the girl, he is in relationship with. Got you.
And thank you so much for your suggestion. Yes, he is confusing as weird.

[bowenw]

That is very odd behavior. Perhaps he is trying to convince you that his current relationship means nothing to him in an attempt to win you over.

[sadrose]

And others are getting involved in it?

[sadrose]

So basically he is interested in me?

[bowenw]

That is my best guess, but I could be totally wrong. I am guessing this because everything he is doing appears to be directed at you.

[sadrose]

No no... you are right maybe... i need to be alert.

[bowenw]

I suggest trying to find out the truth about his current relationship status rather than taking his word for it. Please feel free to DM anytime if you wish.

[sadrose]

Sure. Thank you so much