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I have a coworker that is married and just had a second kid. I am also married with kid. But every time I see her, I feel everything toward her. She is beautiful and sexy and everything else. I would like to know if she feels anyway toward me. But for many obvious reasons, this can seriously backfire. How can I approach this.
my coworker (dark hair, 5’4”, petite, B cup, 33 years) me (dark hair, athletic build, 6’4”, 37 years old)
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What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
9Opinion
Don't approach.
That feeling you have is real, but acting on it will cost you everything, your family, her family, your job.
You're both married with kids.
What you're feeling right now is attraction, not love.
Love is what you built at home.
If you keep looking for signs that she feels the same, you will find them, even if they're not there.
That's how people ruin their lives.
Put distance.
Be professional, be polite, and go home to your wife.
If this feeling is still there in 6 months, talk to a therapist, not to her.
go back to work... and do your job
that's what you should do...
You're married, she is married, you're coworkers, there is a whole lot that could go sideways. Best left alone. Put your head down and do your job, sorry best answer that I can give.
You make no advances toward her. If you are unhappy in your marriage, then work on that, but leave her out of it.
What could possibly go wrong? Think of all the people you can hurt by pursuing this. Just dont.
Ask your wife... I'm sure she'll have a good answer for you.
If you need a second opinion, ask her husband
I think you should not approach this in the slightest way. Don't fuck up two families.
You’re both married. You approach it by sticking your own wedding ring in your face to remind yourself.
It’s mainly a fantasy more than anything.
Well as far as I know husbands fool around and wives fool around too separately whether you like it or not. Reality
Stay away... nothing good will come of this, especially if co workers catch wind of this.
Do yourself a big favor and forget this.
So u want an affair?
I think that would be fun.
Do you want to take her place? ;)
You think you're the guy 6'4, athletic, dark hair.
You think every woman should want you.
But look at what you're actually doing.
You're married, you have a kid at home, and you're on the internet measuring a coworker's cup size "petite, B cup, 5'4" and begging strangers to have an affair with you.
That's not confidence.
That's not being an alpha.
That's insecurity screaming.
A real attractive man doesn't need to chase.
He doesn't need to beg.
Women feel safe around him.
Around you, women feel uncomfortable, that's why she never gave you a sign, and that's why you're here.
You are not the man you think you are in the mirror.
You are just a married man who is not happy with himself, so you try to steal happiness from other women.
No one wants to take her place. Because no one wants to be with a man who would do this to his own family.
And if you're about to reply "I'm just joking" or "you're overreacting" that's exactly who you are.
You do something creepy, then you call it a joke when a woman calls you out.
You hurt your family, then you call it "fun".
That's not a joke.
That's how men with no accountability act.
So go ahead. Reply. Deny it.
Everyone reading will see the exact character I'm talking about.
@rose_noire 100 percent true. What’s your take on men who still cheat and leave their families
My take?
Men who cheat and leave their families don't leave because the other woman is better.
They leave because they were never really there in the first place.
They were physically at home, but mentally they were always looking for an exit, looking for someone to make them feel like a man again,
because they don't know how to be a man at home and in the end, they don't get a happier family.
They just get two broken ones and a kid who grows up learning that love is something you leave.
So, it's not about love.
It's about a man who never learned how to stay.
@rose_noire how do I know my boyfriend wants to marry me and has the potential to be a good husband, or he’s just wasting time and being with me because he couldn’t get the woman he actually wants
You know by how he handles hard times, not good times.
Anyone can be sweet when it's fun.
Look at when you're sick, when you're stressed, when you disagree, when you're not looking your best.
A man who wants to marry you: he stays.
He listens even when you're not easy to love.
He includes you in his future plans without you having to ask
"when WE move", "our house".
He protects your peace, not just your body.
A man who's wasting time: you always feel anxious.
You have to ask for reassurance.
You feel like you're auditioning to be chosen.
He loves you when it's convenient, but disappears when you need him most and you know , deep down you know you're his option because he couldn't get who he really wants.
If you have to keep asking "does he want to marry me?", he probably already showed you he doesn't.
@rose_noire what if the guy keeps me around for comfort? What if he flirts with me but never makes it official or actually plans to solidify the relationship? They just flirt and throw mixed signals
He's not confused, he's comfortable.
If he wanted you, it'd be clear plan, effort, title.
What he's doing is just farming your energy.
Hot when he needs you, gone when he doesn't.
Mixed signals, he wants the benefits without choosing you.
Tell him,"I don't do maybe.
Want me, claim me.
Want comfort, leave me alone."
His action after that is your answer.
@rose_noire why do guys farm your energy from a safe distance?
You ignore it