Two loners make a couple?

I've notice something random about my boyfriend. This summer would be two years, my longest relationship and him likewise. Over the time getting to know him I've noticed that he is really independent, Marches to the beat of his own drum..floats around if you get me. He is very outgoing, social and has many casual friends but few real, deep friendships. He seems to float from cloud to cloud so to speak.

With me he said that he is a loner, didn't get attached every often to people but with me he feels there this is invisible, strong bond he has never had with anyone, there is just such a strong attraction/bond there.

Is hard sometimes being with him as he is so independent I wish he was more involved in my life life and vice versa. Mind you I am considered a loner to, I'm really independent and go by my own path. Is hard because I don't want to get to attached to and him me, just because I've never really dependent on someone this much before.

Not sure what I'm asking but any advice on opening up, spending time, being involved more?


Most Helpful Guy

  • This is a great question and I would love to know the answer as well :)

    • Its been two years and I'm still trying to figure it out haha. Its like he is searching for something, just floating along where ever live takes him.

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    • I just wish he was move involved in my life, to him its okay if we go 2 weeks without hanging out despite the fact he lives 5 houses down. I just feel like I'm doing all the work haha

    • Have you talked to him about how you feel?

      And how involved are you in his life?

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What Guys Said 2

  • If we all weren't afraid of losing someone or didn't have someone to care for, then we could all be Darth Vader and go off blowing up the galaxy or whatever we please. He had already lost everything anyway and nobody could put a gun to his mother's head to make him stop.

    The example is extreme, but hopefully you get the point: Attachments are shackles - people's well-being to care for and fear for, etc..

    The fiercely independent will feel the chafe.

    He now has to factor in how you will be effected by any decisions he makes, and vice versa.

    Remember that these bonds not only make us more vulnerable, but they are also the epicenter from which true happiness can spring if that vulnerability is not exploited (another words, try to refrain from hurting each other or destroying one another's love and trust). For the record, this answer really isn't about Star Wars :)

  • Wow this guy sounds like a spitting image of me. Can I ask how did you guys meet?

    I'm not sure what you want advice on... If you guys as close as you say you are, perhaps you can talk to him about it? Sorry if I'm being simplistic


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