Do guys find it annoying when their girlfriend cries a lot?

[Anonymous]

I get kinda emotional easily and cry often. I find it hard to control and it's at times like when I fight with my mum, hating stuff in life, finding uni frustrating, scared that people will leave me and things like that.

I chat with a guy who recently became my first boyfriend, but we haven't met often. He didn't notice but once when I was messaging him, and yesterday when I was talking with him on the phone I was crying but trying to keep my voice even. But he noticed that my nose was blocked but thought I had a cold.
I am also not good at explaining my emotions so sometimes when I am upset, people think why I am so upset over a little thing and my mum also thinks I overreact.

I was wondering, will an emotional girl or someone who cries often put a guy off if they find out? He know that I don't have much confidence and am an insecure person, but I am scared that I will annoy him or if I will put him off.

Thanks for reading.

[Anonymous]

Everyone gets sad or upset and cries. Some more than others and that's ok. But personally I'm kind of turned off by this. More important than what I think is what your boyfriend thinks. Ultimately he is the one dating you. Next time you find yourself in a fit take a step back and gauge how he is feeling.

[Asker]

Thank you. I'll keep that in mind.

[SüßeJäger]

If he really cares for you it won't annoy him. If it does annoy him, he's just shallow and you don't want him anyway :)

[Asker]

Thank you :) I was worried I would do it too much haha.

[SüßeJäger]

Little things like that shouldn't matter. Talk to him about it :)

[SsethzZ]

Thats just not true. You can be annoyed by constantly having to comfort your girlfriend ALL THE TIME and stilk care for her. doesn't make you shallow

[Zendrya]

I cry all the time. Almost once a day probably. I have a boyfriend and he knows. He is the one that gets me through it. He probably gets a bit annoyed sometimes but he loves me know less and supports me endlessly. If he is worth it than he will be okay with you and help you.

[Asker]

aww he seems like a really nice boyfriend.
Thank you for your advice :)

[Angst-Of-One]

It will largely depend on the guy. Some will some won't. Personally I have particular difficulty with this... I don't find it a turn of or anything persay, I actually get angry... I grew up in a very mentally/emotionally abusive household and my Stepmother used crying as a ploy to manipulate my father and sometimes myself into taking her side in situations that she herself caused... she was a bit of a sociopath... unfortunately this has left me with an innate largely negative reaction to people crying... genuine or not... I always assume that I am being manipulated and as such I respond in ways that are really NOT going to help the situation if it's genuine... the best I have managed to compromise with this is to remove myself from the situation (aka go somewhere else, for a walk or similar)... however when my fiance is genuinely upset this obviously doesn't help either... as I know she wants a hug or the like... but I just can't bring myself to do it... there is a part of my mind that just won't let me... she does understand this and knows what my childhood was like... but every day I wish I had the ability to act as normal people do, and just comfort the person I love more than anything when they are upset... but that behaviour is so ingrained it's so hard to overcome... people have told me in the past to act how I would like to be treated if the roles were reversed... but technically I am... I would want to be left the hell alone... and really dislike being comforted... it all feels very patronising to me...

Anyway, I would be quite surprised if many guys felt the way I do about "girls who cry a lot"... I know I am very much in the minority... but just be aware, we DO exist, most of us are high functioning and you likely wouldn't even realize until that moment where you have had a bad day and start crying etc... and you notice your guy become more and more distant... retreating into himself... all I will say is if that does occur, DO NOT go on the offensive (which you may be tempted to, as you will be feeling extra hurt by this)... if you do, get ready for this to last DAYS rather than one evening...

[Wesj89]

The best thing you can do, is be yourself. If he is put off by you crying, that's fine because it wouldn't work.
I didn't realise my fiance cried as much as she did until about 3 months ago. Sure, sometimes I've got annoyed about it, but I haven't gone anywhere because I love her and will stand by her regardless. It's just take some time for me to understand how best to respond to her that is
helpful to her and how she's feelings and also protects me emotionally to. Because as I care about her, her strong emotional reactions have, or I should say bad, a affect on me too. I know realise I need to try to understand more, say very little and sometimes just let her ride it out. If there is anything ever said out of emotion that I do disagree with, I try to react calmly but also pay attention to how she feels and me to. For example, crying over something that's not my fault and beibg blamed for it - not cool. That's just looking for something to blame.
My point is, there's lots of nice people who will give you, including your emotions, the time of day. Don't pretend to be someone your not, life is too short.

[lonerider]

Crying once or twice is fine. Incessant crying puts me off. Its the girl who have 'i-am-always-the-victim.-everyone-hates-me' kind of mentality.. They sure can't handle themselves and the relationship always goes down.

[Asker]

Ah I see. Thank you for your advice. I will try to be careful about that.

[lonerider]

:) great.

[DodgersGM]

Crying doesn't annoy me at all if it's justified. But if a girl cried over stupid meaningless stuff then it would get annoying.

[Asker]

I see. Would study, stress and family fights be a bit meaningless in your opinion? Thank you for your opinion.

[DodgersGM]

No, those are all issues that carry valid emotional weight.

I'm talking more like crying over childish things. Like if the supermarket ran out of your favorite ice cream flavor. Stuff like that. Haha.

[Asker]

oh, wow. I didn't know people cry over things like that. haha. Thank you for your reply.

[lonerider]

yeah dude seriously even i didn't know people cry over that :P the stupidest thing i have seen a girl cry over is her ex who she herself dumped for flirting with other girls and sexting her best friend :D lolzz

[SsethzZ]

A lot of weird comments here. Here's as truthful as its gonna get:

Its fine if you cry a lot, its actually pretty common for most women.

Men aren't usually emotional, or at least to the extent women can be. We're not as in tuned with our emotions like women are.

Notice this: Women who see other women cry are usually very sympathetic. Men, on the other hand, dont understand it as well. So, we naturally are confused, and people handle confusion differently.

[Anonymous]

Humans are always adverse to people who cry for no reason specifically because humans are geared towards reading as crying as a sign of genuine distress.

[Asker]

Thank you for your opinion :)

[Anonymous]

Not necessarily.

If you're angry or bitter, that would turn me off.

If you're simlpy soft-hearted, but you're also kind-hearted and sweet, that wouldn't bother me.

[Asker]

I see. Thank you for your opinion :)

[tiredofwaiting]

If he supports you and loves you it should not bother him. Women are extremely emotional beings and a majority of them wear their heart on the sleeve.

[Asker]

Ah I see. Thank you :)

[tiredofwaiting]

Yup I have a hormonal imbalance so I am way too emotional!

[KhaysunDei]

yes i find it annoying if she does it wwaaaaayyyy too much because i would think that she's a spoiled brat

[Jbgurl20]

No it's not annoying unless you cry for no reason.