How do I stand on my own feet at age 29?

[Anonymous]

I am turning 29 next month, and I am growing increasingly concerned because I am still financially, mentally, and emotionally dependant on my parents. I still live at home and haven't lived on my own more than a few months. I also haven't held a job for at least a year. The longest I have held a job is 8 months I think. I have had 20 something different jobs ever since I was 16.

Right now, I am on social security disability (SSDI), so I am restricted on the additional income I can receive without it affecting my benefits. I can only make an additional $1400 a month on top of my benefits.

I am realizing the only people keeping me from being homeless is my parents. That is a scary thought.

I am on the Autistic Spectrum by the way and have mental illness.

[ManofHistory]

That is a hard situation, but people have to live with their parents more and more as cost of living keeps increasing. I imagine that you have a hard time keeping a job, at least in part, due to your mental illness and being on the spectrum?

If you can find a job that you can keep, try to do it; however, don't beat yourself up to hard.

How do your parents feel about you living at home?

[Asker]

My mom said I can live here for the rest of my life. And I agree, the economy is making it incredibly difficult to afford even rent. I think it is more difficult for single people because they don't have a spouse or partner to help contribute.

[ManofHistory]

You're 100% right, it is harder for a single person because a couple living together has two incomes. Even if each person makes just $18/hour working 30 hours/week in a partnership, they will be making more together than a single person earning 25/hour that works 40 hours a week. However, certain things will also increase like groceries and gas.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Plenty of places rent for under $500/month. It isn't expensive to rent. It's expensive to rent THERE, which you don't have a right to live in if you can't afford, so you move to Toledo Ohio or some other place you'd consider "fly over" area and get a job just like everybody else has to do to "stand on their own feet" when they don't have a trust fund set up for them. Will it decrease your SSI? Yep... but that doesn't matter because you don't turn down 4k/month to save 1400/month (or whatever you would lose), because it's only net income that matters. Would you be able to just sit around all day and play video games? Nope. Would that be nice? Yeah probably. You know who else can't do it? Everybody else standing on their own feet. Hate to be harsh, but if that's what you want, that's what you have to do. There are plenty of autistic people in Toledo who manage to get by. You're AT LEAST as good as they are.

[Asker]

@BoopBoopBeep I don't play video games at all. I am a software dev and normally spend a lot of time writing code. Also, I live in East Tennessee and where I live, the is a huge demand for housing right now with less supply. Rent is at least $1,300 a month here.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Gotcha, then you move like the rest of us have to if we can't afford where we are. East Tn is beautiful country though... save up and go back eventually if you want, but you may like the cheaper life elsewhere.

That said, rent should be no more than a third of income. At 50k you should be able to afford that. Surely as a software developer you're making more than that.

[Asker]

@BoopBoopBeep I have not been able to land another role in my industry. I am on disability right now.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Then you pick a new industry like the rest of us have to do. There's excuses, and there's results. You just gotta pick which one you want to perfect.

[jahaims]

Talk to your parents about your goals. Therapy would be a good start. If you go to betterhelp. com they have financial assistance for their Therapy sessions. You can also Google promo codes to get a bigger discount

[Spongebobssocks]

Start applying for jobs and dont tell them you have autism. Download linkedin and have a good profile photo and remove 10 of your jobs and make the ones you keep longer. The only real one you need to keep is the most previous one cause thats the one they are gonna want refrence from! Post a decent photo to your linkedin profile and match with reqruiters. Goodluck!

[Asker]

I have a LinkedIn I am very active on. Sadly, I have had very little luck these past several months.

[Spongebobssocks]

Okay have you done what I stated above within LinkedIn?

[In_Trance]

The same way you did for the previous 28 years

[msc545]

You need to get treated for the depression.