People who have experienced complex traumas, how do you cope with impostor syndrome when talking about your experiences?

[RxR0954]

Growing up in an environment that constantly gaslight my experiences and downplay my achievements, most of the time i find it hard to believe myself whenever i talk about my traumas and knowledge i have about subjects that i am qualified for. I would always have a feeling that i am lying whenever i talk about something that actually happened, as my entire life growing up i had to keep telling myself “no it can’t be”/or “everyone in my culture have experienced it” (not everyone in culture have experienced it and i’m glad i had people in my life and childhood who helped me realized what i experienced was on the more extreme end of child abuse). This then rubs off onto my professional life as an adult where i often feel deeply insecure listing out achievements that i should be proud of - as i feel like i didn’t do it, even though there are evidence that tells me i did it and i did it well. I thought i could finally feel more confident in myself after doing a bachelor in psychological science, so i did it, still felt shitty. I thought a master degree in counselling would be better in helping me believing in myself, so i did it, graduated with a distinction, helped many clients cope with and get out of abusive environments, got amazing feedbacks from my supervisor, yet i felt more insecure and more like a con, even though i am at a stage of life where i am more qualified as a professional than i ever was. People who have experienced similar things, how do you cope with imposter syndrome?

[Hardon-Collider]

when you said

• I thought i could finally feel more confident in myself after doing a bachelor in psychological science, so i did it, still felt shitty. I thought a master degree in counselling would be better in helping me believing in myself, so i did it,

doesn't this statement contains a seed of the solution? specifically when you read the first half of the first sentence.

• I thought i could finally feel more confident in myself after doing a bachelor

it's a bit funny even. you know what people with this syndrome have a tendency to do, right? to over-achieve. it's like you are reinforcing the syndrome behavior as an attempt to break the behavior.

anyway, that quoted part stood out to me for another reason. You are again, doubling down on using the intellect to cure an "illness" that is characterized as being cornered inside the intellect.

no amount of "studying" can force you to start "feeling". ㅤ

[RxR0954]

Yea the studying part was the “solution” that didn’t work for me lol i thought i could help myself if i could help other people, but my feelings remained unchanged

[WonderingManII]

I too have experienced Trauma in my life, and even hate myself sometimes. Sometimes I find myself hating others as well. But this world is full of bad people. I am starting to think this world has more bad people in it than good people. So all you can do is try to find the Truth and Good, and hold onto it for dear life. Then maybe you will heal.

[RxR0954]

I have a lot of good in my life and i know the truth, doesn’t change how i feel about myself.

[WonderingManII]

@rxr0954 You got to make up your mind on how you are going to feel about yourself. You got to fight bad thoughts by replacing them with good thoughts. If you got friends who say good things about you to you, you must choose to believe that, and hold on those good words. It's an uphill battle because the human brain needs to be rewired from negative over to positive.

[RxR0954]

True, thanks for the kind words

[Nikki1989]

Complex trauma is frequently rooted in gaslighting or environments where your reality was denied. When you grow up or live in a situation where the pain is minimized, your brain learns to minimize it as a survival mechanism.

[AI Opinion]

Your experiences and feelings are deeply valid. Overcoming impostor syndrome can be challenging, but recognizing your achievements and reminding yourself of your qualifications is crucial. What helped me was keeping a journal of accomplishments to remind me of my progress. Surrounding myself with supportive people who affirm my worth was also vital. Engaging in self-compassion practices and continuous learning built confidence over time. Consider seeking professional guidance to explore these feelings further. Your expertise and personal growth are real, and acknowledging them is a significant step in coping with impostor syndrome.

[Mike_Hum]

Imagine how good your life would be if you stopped always making yourself the victim.

[RxR0954]

“Always” making myself a victim? Bold for you to assume i make myself the victim. I like to say i’m a survivor instead of a victim. And also, go say that to other child abuse survivors, actually you know what, go to abused children (especially small children who were raped) and say it to their face as if being abused by adults as a 5 year old little kid is something actively choose. You are simple minded.