Do you think it's rude if your guests tell you to tone down your PDA?

[HedwigInABox]

We celebrated Christmas at my sisters house and her boyfriend was there as well. They kissed and made out so much that me and my other sister were uncomfortable.

We wanted to watch a film so me my sister and her boyfriend were on the sofa (my other sister already went to another room because it was too much for her) and they just made out and whispered to each other the whole time. So I went to bed too.

My sister later came in asked me why I was sleeping already, and I told her the PDA made me uncomfortable. So she now basically thinks I called her a whore. We haven't talked since then.

Do you think it's rude to tell someone to tone down their PDA?

[Ozanne]

If you were at her house and you don't like it, you can leave. It's their house. If they pull that behaviour at your house or someone else's house, then you have every right to let them know that it's not acceptable.

She is also being dramatic about it if she actually used the words "you think I'm a whore', because that's not what PDA means and she should be grown up enough to know the difference between that and being a slut.

If she makes any issue of it, you can just say that you're sensitive to it, and though you're happy she's in love and you like that she's in a good relationship (if that's so), then you can compliment that, but let her know that you too have boundaries and limits of what makes you uncomfortable no matter who it is, and in this particular case, you wish that she understand that. After which, if there is no coming to terms with it while you are at her house, you may want to rethink actually going to her house while he's there if she refuses to acknowledge that it makes you feel uncomfortable.

[lost_girl2000]

No it's not rude at all!!! I've been where you are. Multiple times. PDAing in front of your friend/sibling is insulting to say the least. It's ok if it's just a few kisses, but making out the entire night in front of others, you show them that you don't care if they are present or not. And since it's making you uncomfortable, you have every right to speak up about it. Now if your friend/sibling can't get the point that's definitely not your fault. I had a friend once who actually bit her boyfriend's nipple in front of me! And of course made out the whole time, especially when I was around and trust me it wasn't just a peck on the lips. Once I stopped hanging out with her and she asked why, I told her that her PDA made me highly uncomfortable and her only response to that was that another friend of hers was ok. I'M SORRY B*TCH, I'M NOT OK WITH IT!!!

Anyway I've written a myTake about it, if you're interested.

[hahahmm]

Think you went overboard if all they did was kiss & hold each other. It's not like they were groping each other or trying to have sex right in front of you. When you're in someone else's home it's their space that you were invited into. It would be rude for you to say a peep. In fact, even if a couple is in MY house and kissing I wouldn't say a peep to them. They're not doing anything wrong. I would have just ignored them. But if they were making too much noise to ignore then I would've went to another room.

Maybe tell her, "I don't think you're a whore. You just remind me of one"...

Okay, I kid. I guess you should say, 'I'm not judging you but I felt uncomfortable because I'm not comfortable kissing a guy in front of others." Or something like that.

[rjroy3]

Tell? Yes

Ask? No that's reasonable. But the line matters.

[rjroy3]

If they were just kissing, unless it was a scenario where you wanted to talk but couldn't because she was making out then maybe say something. That you want to spend time with her but can't.

But if it's a party I'd say you overreacted. Because obviously your sister felt you were mad and refused to hang out the rest of the night solely because she madeout with her boyfriend at a party.

Putting myself in her shoes I get it. In general there is a respectful line for pda. In this situation I don't think they crossed it. I think you felt uncomfortable because it was your sister and later on made it a bit of a scene

[sweetvirgocreature]

I don't think it's rude to tell someone to tone down their PDA when it makes you and someone else uncomfortable. As long you approach it nicely and just explain why it made you uncomfortable that's all that matters. I had to tell my cousin to tone down her PDA with her boyfriend during my nephew's first birthday, I just pulled her to the side and explained to her, why I found it uncomfortable and why our family members also find it uncomfortable. And plus, it's not like this is the only time they can display PDA towards each other. It's like that one saying, "There's a time and place for everything." And if your sister still believes you are calling her a whore, then you just need to tell her calmly, that's not what you are trying to say. You just want to be able to spend time with her and if her boyfriend is around comfortably. Because I think it sucks that you guys couldn't enjoy each other's time together. Just talk to her.

[CurlyGirl42]

I think it is fair the way you did it.. essentially they are allowed to make out and so, but you are sure also in your right to act upon it, and ignoring it or taking yourself away from it is a great way to deal with it.
I hope your sister learns to tone it down so you can all be together in the same room without anyone being uncomfortable.

[CakesNCream]

Not at all. It's rude to act that way in front of everyone. I dont care how inlove you think you are, you shouldn't be touching and kissing like that in front of your family and friends.

[CakesNCream]

Just realised its an unpopular opinion. I guess its because I'm south Asian, either way this is my opinion

[iseekpinetrees]

No its more likely they have a kink about being watched or caught. Im all for making out but pda has its limits.

[Anonymous]

PDA is awesome to some limits. I’ve been in a room where a couple were making out as if they were in their bedroom. Me and the other person in the room left because of how uncomfortable it was.

[Newhead]

I think couples who are all over each other in front of other people are very weird and looking for attention, you did nothing wrong.

[douride2]

I think your sister is in the wrong here. Making out while you have guests over is just plain rude I my opinion. They should have retired to their bedroom.

[In_Trance]

Not rude

[taeh_ie2]

No I don’t think that’s rude, someone is just uncomfortable and asking the couple’s to tone it down.

[KrakenAttackin]

Not at all. If they want to have excessive PDA they need to get a fucking room.

[GAGSucksBalls1]

I should not have gone to my cousins for Christmas, during a FUCKING PANDEMIC

but i did ayway

nor should you have

[Twalli]

Not at all. Yet if it's their house you can expect their affection to be slightly more open than in other situations

[Anonymous]

It's your house. I'm pretty sure you determine what is rude.

[Opinion Owner]

I misread. It seems rude to me but I don't know

[Anonymous]

If they're being rude, and they are, then there's nothing wrong with politely asking them to knock it off

[Anonymous]

its totally understandable, shit is awkward people need to respect those aorund them

[fxllenone]

I can see why it made you uncomfortable, I don't think you did anything wrong.

[TraceyByrd]

I'd be like " gtfo already idiots ! " 😒💯

[MDollarBill]

Maybe, but if someone is being that bad, tough!

[COMMODOREII]

What is PDA?

[HedwigInABox]

Public Display of Affection

[COMMODOREII]

Oh. Lol i mean i don't mind it but if we were trying to watch a movie i would have told them to get a room. Lol