Am I going crazy? Is my mom right?

[zhiiscloud]

I don't know what I'm doing wrong but I can never tell what's going to happen when with my mom. She snaps so easily on me.. She snapped maybe like 3 times today and a few times yesterday.. this happens regularly but I'm failing to understand what I do wrong. Can I talk to some parents and ask if this is normal? Maybe a different perspective would help?

[LicorMortis]

First, you should sit down and talk to your mom calmly. Do not raise your voice. When one person raises their voice the other one (if they aren't trained to not, or have the willpower to resist) will raise their voice as well. Get your thoughts as articulated as you can, even if it means writing them down beforehand. Try to do it on a day when you know she's not in a bad mood.

Second, delete this app. You're not going to get a lot of good help on here. Please. You're thirteen and shouldn't be on an app like this. I don't mean to sound condescending if I do, but please get off this app for your own well-being.

[zhiiscloud]

I guess you're right, I just thought I could get older perspectives from this app.

[Anonymous]

I remember growing up with a father that had many of the same issues. Constant outbursts, feeling unsafe as a child because I could never predict his behaviour or understand what upset him. As a parent now, the rightness or wrongness depends on how severe the problem is or what she's reacting to. Can you give an example of something your mom is angry or upset about?

[Anonymous]

I don’t feel it is anything you are doing wrong My Mum was similar to your Mum it was like walking on eggshells around her at times because you never knew what would set her off just having my door closed would set her off sometimes it got to the point where she would pick something up and throw it towards you she even one time went to cut up some of our family photos

My Mum is no longer alive however I always strongly believed she was battling a mental health disorder something like Bipolar because it just wasn’t normal

[zhiiscloud]

My mom has mental health problems too, she even told me. She also physical health ones, I pray she isn't bipolar but it could be possible. I just don't know, she can be upset one minute then happy or trys to act like nothing happen. One minute she's threatening to change my school or something then the next she starts to relax. She can say something fucked up towards my face then act like nothing just happened.

[Opinion Owner]

My Mum was the same way would say something and the next act like nothing happen and the very next day or 2 days later it was the same repeated cycle

If your Mum does have mental health problem I would say she need to go and see her doctor and ask for help she might need to see a psychologist and possibly even change her medication if she is taking medication because there is a possibility if she is taking medication that that medication is not the right medication for her there is a possibility she could be abusing her medication and that is contributing to her not so normal behaviour

Maybe try and speak with other family members in your family like an aunt or a sibling or even a cousin and see if they can help your Mum get the much needed help it sounds like that she needs

[zhiiscloud]

I been thinking about writing down every time she snaps out on me and I don't do anything much to trigger it. Once I get to a good number I bring it up.

[Opinion Owner]

I used to record my Mum’s outburst on my phone so writing down things I feel is a good idea

[zhiiscloud]

I'm not comfortable recording outbursts 😬... And I might try writing them down but that'd be a lot of writing.

[skyymf_]

girl honestly, i feel the same way. nd im 14, these type of things, nd other shii eventually lead to depression fa me 😭.

[zhiiscloud]

Yeah, it's sorta gotten better but I don't know. She's not a bad mom, we just all have our own issues. Our family has all been through a lot of stuff.

[skyymf_]

yess ik whatchu saying, i wasn't tryna say nun bad. we all been through tough times, i jus sometimes feel like i can't communicate with her without her yk taking it a wrong way. i go through stuff nd shii, but sometimes when i get mad, i start to feel bad cs ik she go through stuff too 😭.

[zhiiscloud]

You're good! I didn't take it in any bad way. But yeah, family can be a little stressful but I'm more then grateful to have her as a mom. She has her moments when things get really bad but I'm probably lucky to have her as a mom rather than someone else.

[skyymf_]

manee fss 😩, my mom da real mvp. she a bottom boy survivor 😭😭. the fact that she would sacrifice her things, jus to make sure that we have what we need is like everything 😩😩. when i get rich, i promise you. imma make sure my momma straight.

[zhiiscloud]

I'm a little stupid and don't know too much slang, just basics. What is a bottom boy survivor?

[skyymf_]

its a rod wave thing 😭😭, you don't listen to him?

[zhiiscloud]

I never heard of him and I'm also not a big rap fan. I only like a few rappers. I prefer regular singing.

[skyymf_]

he do sing tho, he do like both kinda 😭😭.

[zhiiscloud]

I'm just really not a big rap person. Doesn't matter who raps it. Only a few people I tolerate.

[skyymf_]

oh okay 😭

[OlderAndWiser]

How old is your mom?

[zhiiscloud]

My mom is 41.

[OlderAndWiser]

So it's probably not menopause. Maybe she is hiding something from you that is causing her to feel stressed.

[zhiiscloud]

It's more than that, I just want all of this stop in a positive way

[OlderAndWiser]

Have you asked your mom if something is bothering her?