I was discussing to my mom about what happened between my boyfriend and I. Hoping to get words of wisdom and motherly advice. Which turned into a argument 🤦🏻♀️. Mom:I don’t understand why someone would want to be with you, with the way you act? What makes this boy any different from all the other guys?
Me: He is still there for me and still fighting for me. All the other guys in the past would throw in the towel and walk away cause of my emotions and insecurities.
Mom: The thing with you is, you always want things done right away. Since the day you were born. Always crying kicking and screaming! Now your roommate brother is carrying that cross.
Me: 🙄🤦🏻♀️ You’re right mom. I’m such a horrible person, that all my family members are carrying a cross because of me. Including people who come into my life. You should’ve aborted me since I’m such a horrible person.
Mom: No, you just need help. I’m tired of my children blaming your father and I of your guys emotions and relationships!
Do your parents help you or make matters worse when asking them for relationship advice?
My parents don't have the best rack record when it comes to helping me out with my relationships. I mean, I love them and all, because they're usually pretty awesome, but not when it comes to this topic.
You see, when I met my girlfriend, she was already and adult, and I was still a minor. She was a student at the university that my dad works at. It was an international university, and there where a lot of foreign teachers. However, these teachers where all seriously religious, and if they knew that a student and I where (sort of) together, it would be bad. And at one point, my parents found out about what was going on between me and my girlfriend. They told to lay low and back off a bit, which, considering the situation was probably a good idea. But, their definition of "back off" was completely forget about my girlfriend and never talk to her again. I mean, what the actual f*ck? Sure, I was taking a big risk, which usually isn't a good idea, but still, I'd at least expect parents to be a little bit sympathetic. You know, something like, "This isn't the best idea, but since you seem to really love her, we'll help you out a bit. But for the most part, try to lay low and make sure no one finds out." That would have been the ideal reaction. And you might say, "But they wouldn't know that you really loved each other." Sure, under other circumstances, probably not, but my girlfriend and I had already talked to my parents and told them how we both felt. But no, their solution was still to completely cut her out of my life.
They have since then realized that our love is true, and are much more accepting. But they're still not the best at relationship advice... My little brother, who's in middle school, still asks me for advice rather than my parents.
Sounds like a gas lighting mother so in your case no. But she has a point you need to work on yourself. No guy can ever fix you, you are the only one that can do that. Face your fears an release that they are making things come true. It's not the guy it's you reflecting your insecurities on them.
I gave up on asking them for any kind of advice when they just threw their own bias into the mix rather than anything useful so I ask my friends who do listen and will give me usable advice
Asking my mom for relationship advice would be the same as asking a politician to be honest.. Never a good idea. My mom has been married and divorced 7 times.. Just about every single time, her fault.
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