How do you deal with trust issues you have?

[Anonymous]

(Clarify what it’s about)

[dustybiker]

Confront it or ignore it (if nothing can be done about it)

One situation came to mind where one of my childhood friends wanted into a girls pants. The girl lived in the neighborhood and most everyone had already claimed to have slept with her.
At some point my friend told this girl I had spread something around about this fact.
I hadn’t.
She sees me outside one day and gathers a group of girls (who I knew longer than her lol) and comes at me without telling them why.
As the story unfolds and everyone learns the lie the other girls answered her before I had the chance, saying that I wasn’t that type of person.
She didn’t know how to react to that.
So we all head to my buddy’s house at my suggestion.
Asked him wtf?
He was squirming and turning red. Tried to tell the girl she took his words out of context. He finally admitted to fluffing a lie.
That hurt me incredibly. I still forgave him even though it still hurts. He never did it again. I trust he won’t.

[dustybiker]

Thanks for mhg.

[ch15hann]

depends on the person but i observe people a lot and one little thing can make me question them. if it continues and i don’t really know the person, i don’t say anything and i don’t keep contact with the person. but if i know them well, i usually confront and if they continue i block all contact

[ch15hann]

thanks for the mho

[SenileOldMan]

I don't think I've ever been susceptible to trust issues. That might sound far-fetched but my thinking patterns might be a bit unusual. It's not that I've lived a life free from deceit and betrayal -- far from it -- or naively think everyone is trustworthy. It's because I don't see what I did wrong if I'm betrayed.

I also don't dwell on questions I find lots of people asking on here, like how do I know if my SO loves me? As odd as it sounds, my thinking is that I don't need to know. My wife acts like someone who loves me. She's been there for me when I'm at my worst. I can't read her mind and it's not important to me to know for sure that she loves me. If somehow she has been acting like she loves me all along and doesn't, it makes no difference to the way she has treated me.

So I think with the way I think, I'm not susceptible much at all to trust issues. Trying to think like this also might be something of a cure for people who suffer them.

[SenileOldMan]

The impression I get sometimes from people with trust issues is that they have this overwhelming urge to know things, especially things that could hurt them if they're wrong in their assumptions. But I always found it comfortable enough to say, "I don't know" to many such questions. I think taking comfort in "I don't know" is part of a way to overcome the temptation to develop trust issues.

[SenileOldMan]

There's also that saying that "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger". I don't really think that's true in all cases. Sometimes I think what doesn't kill us makes us weaker if we become paranoid and afraid of the same thing happening to us again. I think the saying is true if, instead of growing more afraid of the thing happening again, you become less afraid because you already experienced it and survived it. It's like if we try a new sport and fall on our ass, we get stronger if we get back up again with twice the determination and half the fear, but not if we start becoming so afraid that we don't want to get back up.

[AdithyaR]

I take my time before trusting people until I'm actually sure they're worthy of it.

[Citizenkirk]

I try to be honest and lay it out there from the very beginning.

[exitseven]

I do not trust many people and that is how I deal with it.

[moonpie89]

Haha I so relate to that. Unfortunately I trust people easily 😕 😪 😔 😞

[Anonymous]

I don’t. I just leave the issue of trusting something or someone there and I won’t address it unless I really must.

[TrillXHippy]

Usually if I’m looking for chocolate chip cookies it says chocolate chip cookies on the label

[Nazorella]

I can’t deal with it.

[Hangry06]

You don't.
Just leave it at that

[Subarugirl]

Simple I just don’t blindly trust people

[AnthonyJ01]

I keep from letting anyone close.