How to tell my family and boyfriend that I'm leaving for the military within the next few months?

[Anonymous]

So my family and boyfriend know that I am planning to join the military. However they think that it'll be at least 2 years away after I get my 4 year degree. I have been looking into joining sooner and have been thinking about it a lot. Even with only having my associates degree i can join and be either an E2 or E3 and already be making more, I will also be able to obtain my bachelor's degree while I'm enlisted so i'll still be getting education. The only thing is lately my boyfriend has had some medical issues going on and it does scare me to not be there for him when he needs me. As well as my dads having health problems and there is talk about having a few surgeries in the near future. One thing that I do know is that if I left I would be able to have my dad and on my military insurance and at some point my boyfriend as well as we have talked about getting married some time down the road. any advice on how to tell them that I am thinking about going at the end of the year or at the start of next year.

[libsaretards]

I served so take some advice: The moment your mind is 100% made up is the moment you need to tell them. This is a huge adjustment for your family so they will need time to cope. You would be wise to join sooner rather than later so you can maximize your time should you make it a full career.

Start talking to your boyfriend now. Also, do not let his or your dad's health concerns delay your decision. The sooner you join, the sooner you can knock out Basic Training and AIT/A-School/Tech School (same training just different name depending on branch of service), get established at your first command and get started on setting benefits up. Also if you join now most of the branches are giving hefty sign-on bonuses.

You serving enlisted first then making the transition to officer later will earn you more respect. You will be what is called a Mustang. Your troops will trust your leadership more because you will have practical military experience vs. just being fresh from college and outranking half the military from the jump. Your pay as an officer will be boosted at each rank as well to reflect your enlisted time. Just make sure you make the jump to officer before you reach E6. At E6 and higher the military is less likely to want to make you an officer because they will expect you to go up the enlisted trajectory. Also you will have so much time in service that the military would fear you making the jump to officer just to retire not too long after. When I was in you could not make the jump to Commissioned officer after you served 16 years enlisted but you could become a warrant officer.

If you have aspirations to become an officer, your best bet is to serve 4-8 years (aka 1-2 terms) enlisted then make the jump to officer. If your chain of command refuses to put in your packet, leave the service and go back as an officer. Many people think once you leave the service it is over. That is not true. As long as you have an Honorable Discharge and RE-1 reenlistment code you can re-up. So let's say you do one 4-year term, put in the packet for officer but do not get picked even with your bachelor's degree. You can ETS out, wait one day then immediately commission with a brand new contract as an officer. It is ideal to make the jump to officer while still actively enlisted, but your chain of command can make or break that decision.

[BCA6010]

^This.

[Miristheiss]

Just tell them. The sooner the better.
Do not worry about the boyfriend situation... you leaving for the military is a "break up" situation so any worries there will go away because you will no longer be a couple.
He'll be sleeping with new girls after you leave and you'll be hooking up with some of the endless male soldiers you'll be around 24/7.

Telling the parents is your main agenda. Just tell everyone... the longer you wait the worse it will be.

It is up to you and the boyfriend if you want to just break up now and move on or try and have a 2 month "last hurrah" or not.

[Anonymous]

It’s been a known fact men with military gfs have little or no patience their girlfriend being away and they end up cheating.

[Vendela]

"Mom, Dad, I'm leaving a lot sooner than you expected." There you go.

[RationalMale]

As a guy with a military family member:
1. Are you willing to sacrifice your relationship with your boyfriend? You two will most likely break up, whether it's you sleeping with other people which you almost definitely will, him finding a new girl while you're gone, or both.
2. The military will stamp the independent thought out of you. Creativity and independence are anathema to them.
3. Are you willing to put life and limb on the line for a political conflict somewhere that has nothing to do with the USA or defending your homeland/countrymen?

[Desire-for-Greatness]

Is there a reason why you'd join the military? Is your country getting invaded? Is your family in danger? No?

Are you bloodthirsty and want to murder people in poor countries?

I really don't understand why a woman would choose to join the military in a stable country.

[Asker]

Yes I have many reason on why I want to join but I don’t put them out there publicly. Also I’d rather work one job and be able to provide for my family even and give back to those sun danger even if that means making sacrifices than work 4 jobs and still barley make ends meet. Nowhere did I say I want to murder people. As the jobs I’m qualified for aren’t combat related.

[Desire-for-Greatness]

Well, I'm from Iraq and I've lost more than you know and I'm still considered lucky because I wasn't one of the 1 million innocent people who were killed by the American invasion.

I fucking hate war.

[whiskeyontherocks]

Just tell them and stick to what is best for you.
Side note: whatever the recruiter told you expect to be a lie until proven otherwise.
Best and worst decision you will ever make and never regret.
But you’ll definitely regret not doing it.

[jshm2]

Tell them you're off to kill and steal for the state within the next few months.

That you're not bright enough to get into the CIA to do it stealthily. But will just be a glorified gang member of the military, instead.

[Moose304]

I would suggest talking to the family first and laying it all out. Listen to the family. This is the largest hurdle in my mind. The boyfriend will either accept it or move on.

[20yearsolder]

What I just read sounds perfect, tell them the reasons that you're wanting to enlist. You think that the benefits outweigh the negative

[bamesjond0069]

Well your relationship is probably over but im sure you knew that already.

[Anonymous]

You could present it as a question to them.
Like…. How would or what would you think it I were to go earlier than stated?

[jimmy2]

We'll be sure that what you want to do then tell him

[Anonymous]

You just want to smash the dudes there. Stop capping

[Opinion Owner]

Women don't make good soldiers anyway

[Iron_Man]

Sleep on it follow your heart

[TrillXHippy]

Here is what you do. Tell them

[TrillXHippy]

all at once by explaining to them that you’ve been thinking about this for along time and it’s something that you really want to do