How can someone deal with a person consistently being bothersome but not intentionally?

[Kayla45]

Allow me to explain, I have several friends in my social circle, a few of them are abnormally loud and draw unwanted attention to us. I'm not sure if they're aware of how loud they are because they always talk proudly with a super upbeat attitude. Is there any way I could kindly ask them to tone it down without sounding mean?

[ChrisMaster69]

The thing with social groups is it’s often made up of all various types.

Some will be naturally boisterous and or loud all the time, some at various other times.

some of my friends are if music is on and dancing, others if it’s other stuff.

We really need to be accepting of people and accept they are as they are and are our friends.

i can come over as the loud one in a group due to my accent being deep n loud lol, it’s easier to pick out from a crowd.

[HopefulGuy94]

No matter what happens we have to be kindly say it , if that continues we must be annoyed if not we could feel bad , as a result he or she is also a human being like us so we use appropriate words to warn him or her kindly.

[Anonymous]

I don't know why you deleted my post on your topic regarding mods. But it makes no difference, his conduct has been again reported to admin, and admin has copies of it.

I also don't know why you defend such a person, but that is your prerogative. But I won't associate with anyone on here who supports a man who asks minors for nudes.

You may delete this as well if you wish, it makes no difference and I won't reply to it. Have a good night.

[Kayla45]

I removed it because I didn't want for it to turn into a heated debate, nothing personal against you. If I had let it stay then I'd basically be promoting something I'm not comfortable with.

You two obviously have your differences, I completely understand that. But all I ask is please don't do it to each other on one of my questions, that's all I ask really. Just be kind or walk away from a situation, again I'm trying to keep things civil.

[Opinion Owner]

I'll break my rule.

He came to MY comment stream to start things with me. Why not remove his comments?

Differences is putting it mildly. He was caught by admins sexually harassing users, and repeatedly asking for nudes from minors. They checked his comments. They checked his DMs and saw it. He can lie and deny all he wants, those are facts.

Being civil is fine. Defending or in any way being friends with a known pedophile and predatory user is unacceptable in my eyes.

[Kayla45]

You're probably right, I should have just removed all the comments below to the original point where I replied to you, absolutely.

Also, it isn't my intention to defend anybody in particular, I just cannot tolerate just general behavior that promotes a negative environment. I hope you understand it wasn't some big vendetta or something like that, if it was I wouldn't go out of my way to kindly explain as to why I removed your original comment on the question.

It's just a matter of being respectful, one human to another. I have zero idea about what sort of things or whatever was said, but it's none of my business.

[Opinion Owner]

I appreciate the explanation, I can respect you even if I abhor the piece of shit you're friends with. But him, he gets no respect.

[Opinion Owner]

But why are you even friends with him? After all he's done to the women and kids on here? Would you abide this behavior offline?

[Kayla45]

I'll give it to you straight, he's personally been very kind and understanding to me, I haven't had any reason to disregard him. Friends though? To be perfectly honest I consider very few people on the internet I'd consider actually my friends, he's moreso an acquaintance that's been nothing but genuinely nice to me.

Again that's the reason, whatever happened behind the scenes, assuming you are a moderator as well? I suppose? I don't have any knowledge of, I've never been in a position where I'd know about anything like that, so... I don't judge people based off of what information I may hear about them without some sort of verification of their wrongdoing. It's really just as simple as that, there's others on GaG who consistently reply and are nice to me in my questions and comments too, not just him.

[Opinion Owner]

No, but I am friends with three of his victims.

But he's actually one of 4 you follow on here, clearly he means more to you than most on here. And it has been verified, if it was not true he'd still be an uber mod and influencer. He lost it precisely because he did it.

So if a guy was nice to you offline, you'd overlook his pedophilia? Because that's the same line of thought you're expressing here.

[Kayla45]

I do truly sympathize if that's what really had been going on behind the scenes, but I just can't take something and just be like "well this individual says it happened so it really and truly must have happened right?"

I don't know to be perfectly honest with you, maybe I give people the benefit of the doubt. If I had jumped to believing what everything someone says is true then I'd imagine life would be much more difficult.

As to why my followers is so small, I had the message option turned on and someone had been consistently bothering me in my DMs, so I unfollowed lots of people, some in which I no longer had a particular interest in their content they made, and that's fine, maybe I should follow other people besides just them sure, it probably looks bad on my end I suppose in your eyes but the very few I currently follow don't bother me.

If I knew without certainty the offline individual was doing something like that I'd probably avoid them, sure. But I'm a Christian, regardless of ones sins it's simply not my place to judge, I don't have to interact with them sure, but being mean solves no issues and only creates a negative environment.

[Opinion Owner]

Except as I said, it was proven. If it wasn't he would still have his status. And yes, it does look pretty bad when one of the few you follow is a known pedophile and sexual harasser. But I digress, it's clear you won't listen to reason, change your mind on being friends with this piece of shit or much of anything else. That's fine, you do you. But just saying, as a final aside, Jesus wouldn't be friends with him, pretty sure none of the apostles were sex offenders.

Have a good night and have a good friendship with it. I hope it's worth it for you.

[Kayla45]

I hope you have a good night as well, I'm sorry we weren't able to come to an understanding but I do really hope for the best. I'm sorry if I had offended you in any way. Have a good night.

[Dinklex3]

I mean depending on the place and situation you can say "shhh (insert reason)" like if they're saying certain things with children around or something.
But otherwise, it's nice to accept friends as they are. I wouldn't lower and change my voice just because a friend thinks i should.

[jshm2]

No.

They probably think they are the life of the party.

As long as they are not shady, or doing things that cause fights among you, just write them off as your crazy friends.

[TallAnon]

Yeah, just tell them, they're friends, right? Should be cool. Just casually mention it at some point, like "Guys , what's going on? You guys are so loud :O"

[ArtemisSilver]

Drink until it ceases to bother you 👍

[mVCyberduVm]

Sounds like crazy friends

[corneliusmotrodisney]

Yes, I was explaining how it was, it was ok