I got drunk and made a bad impression, do I still apologize?

[Anonymous]

My parents wanted a better life for me long ago, bringing me to Maine. I was 3 years old at the time. These people we're friends with have known us for the longest. They have/had (they probably think something differently now) a good impression of me.

I've been exhausted with exams lately and got drunk with a couple new college female friends. They've been trying to convince me for the longest to not take things too serious, relax and enjoy life. I finally gave in, went to their party and we (including me) got all drunk. This isn't the first time drinking but I've never drank a lot before; not like that.

I obviously came home very drunk, walking sloppy, suddenly saying a bunch of nonsense (mocking god and other things) and starting vomiting. I think they were shocked that was coming from me. I've just made the one of the worst impression aobut me. Do I apologize though?

[Wsx2wsx2ws]

STILL apologize? What do you mean still. Why would you not. If you do something out of character that affects others then you should show your truer nature by apologizing.
We all make very stupid mistakes. I know and everyone here knows the deep truth of that. Mistakes are not who we are. ... As long as you don't keep doing it that is.

So OBVIOUSLY you should apologize. No go do it already.

[guy_123]

That is sad. I would try to apologize

[Asker]

I will. I'm still the same girl they've known.

[guy_123]

Of course you are. You weren't acting how they expected because you were drunk, and they should understand that. Especially if it was only once and after all the stress from the exams. You had no experience and now you regret doing it, which is ok, so they shouldn't judge you based on your actions while in that condition, they were talking to another person. Show them the girl you really are and everything will be ok. Good luck :)

[guy_123]

Thanks for the MHO! 😉

[guy_123]

How did it go?

[Asker]

It went ok.

[alderoth]

That's actually up to you. I'm sure a solid yes, or no, is what you are looking for, but you have to judge the situation for yourself and determine if an apology is the right things to do, or if just ignoring it is the best option.

Now, with that said, what do you do if one of them, or your parents bring it up? Well, you have recognized that it wasn't how you normally act. You were stressed out and let loose for the night with some friends, and got a little out of hand. No biggy. So, if they do bring it up, just explain the situation. If you want, you can include something like, "I'm so sorry you saw me like that. It definitely wasn't normal, and I said some terrible things. I genuinely feel bad for it, and I hope it doesn't change your impression of me. I was just letting off steam from a stressful time, and trying somthing new. I apologize."

To me, like, if I was those people, that right there would be enough. I would think, "well, she has been in school the past year. It could've gotten to her for a little bit. She's just doing her best and trying to relax some. No big deal. I forgive her." It would make it all easier to digest.

Anyway, I hope you get to feeling better about all of this soon. It's not that big of a deal, but I commend you for having a conscience about it. Not many people do, I know I didn't when I was young lol. Got me in a lot of trouble. Take care, and be safe!!

[SteveSmith1985]

You sound like a very very sweet and generally innocent girl. I'm sorry you went through this.

My college days were filled with all kinds of super-drunk shenanigans. I have absolutely done my share of vomiting, and having people see me at less-than "my best"

I feel badly for you, because you clearly care deeply about the opinion these people have of you. I do think you apologize. Just to 'clear the air' and to acknowledge-out loud--something you ALL know happened.

But you know what? I don't think that this is going to fundamentally change their image of you (no matter how little-miss-perfect they believe you to be). I don't know you, or the family friends in question. But if I imagine the most uptight, ultrareligious, conservative people I can think of... they are still human.

They have been drunk before. They may or may not have been to college before. They cannot possibly think that someone being drunk (even really drunk) is all that shocking. I mean, you're in college. And on top of that, they have a lifetime of evidence that you're a good person. Now, you're still a good person... just one who happened to get really drunk that one time. But I guarantee you, that these upstanding family friends have, at some point, done something less-than-perfect.

Although... I absolutely appreciate that this is super embarrassing. I think you should apologize. And I do not think this will change the good-opinion these family friends have always had of you.

P. s. If it makes me a bad person, so be it... but I laughed quite hard (out loud) at:

"I obviously came home very drunk, walking sloppy, suddenly saying a bunch of nonsense (mocking god and other things) and starting vomiting."

This... is maybe my favorite single-sentence-description a drunken time, that I've ever heard in my life. 🙂

[SamIam96]

Such a painful story. I feel for you.

You sound like a good person who made a mistake. Everyone makes mistakes. The important thing is how we correct them. You should make a special effort to apologize to your family friends as soon as possible. Tell them about your stress at school new friends, etc. They will understand, see your remorse and will surely forgive you. It wouldn't be surprising if they made similar mistakes when they were younger. If they lecture, accept their advice graciously.

[RACSKC0B]

You know how you can tell apologizing is the right thing to do?
Because it's the last you want to do, right?
You'd probably rather just avoid them until they died.
Nothing in life worth having, come easy.

Also, don't beat yourself up too much, it's Maine. If those people don't drink, it's because weed is legal there now.
We're probably related, I'm not kidding.

[Asker]

I think I'll owe up to it. I really do feel awful the way I acted.

[Onceuponoflove]

You're in your early 20s and still a baby I am sure they understand. As for your friends you should ditch them. This is why I don't talk to people that drink and do drugs they always want you to have a shitty life like them. You're better than them don't go down to their level. You don't want to become a drug addict or alcoholic depended on the government.

[Asker]

Hopefully they'll understand that was really out of my character. I was raised differently than those girls I was hanging around with lately.

[Onceuponoflove]

Yes stay away from them. I never hang out with druggies because they are usually poor and miserable and they want you to be the same. Misery loves company. They are usually poor with their hand out asking you for money so they can get high or drunk.

[zagor]

Were they visiting when you got home? From what you said I would assume so, but you should have included that in your post.

So next time you see them, apologize, tell them you were stressed about exams and someone talked you into going for drinks and you overdid it because you weren't used to drinking like that.

[zagor]

I did something like that when I was 21; around Christmas while home on break I came home hammered and a long-time neighbor was over visiting (she also happened to be a pastor).

[erandal]

Apologise for your behavior and say you won't drink that much again. I am sure they did that themselves at least once and if they are good parents, and as long as you really mean it, then they should both accept it and forgive you.

[Panzer21]

Its not a big deal, i doubt a serious apology is needed. Maybe a quick "sorry for being such a mess that night."

Dont make that a habit though, for your own good more than anyone elses.

But its not trashy behavior, its youth. Its trashy behavior if it happens twice a week.

[ChicanaChick]

You're nicer than me. I suppose you can apologize if you want to and tell them to start all over.
I've gotten drunk before and nope, I didn't apologize.

[courtney06]

You can apologize and own up to what you did, but there's no guarantee they will forgive you. I've done something similar years ago.

[FilmGuy93]

Of course you apologize? You stepped wrong, and now you have to own up to it. You being drunk wasn't their fault lol

[Asker]

They had the concept of me as the sweet, family-oriented girl that would never do white trash (that's the name they call that) behaviors, that maintain her heritage, manners and family roots. The worst part is one of those people had a son my age who wanted to meet me. That guy had bad luck with girls like that and he thought I was different. He heard nice things about me and instead got the surprise of seeing me acting like that.

I guess I've ruined my image. They probably now think I've copied the trashy girls' behaviors and become like them. I'm still the same girl. That was really out of my character.

[FilmGuy93]

You can always ask them for a do-over. Apologizing to them will go a long way to showing them that you aren't some average girl

[Asker]

Thanks. Will do that.

[Birdlegs]

I want to get that drunk someday I never have gotten sloppy drunk and I’ve only puked once

[Asker]

It's not fun at all. In the end you make a fool out of yourself.

[Sparkie460]

You made a bad decision. Everyone does that some time in their life. Just apologize

[Adronicus]

I wouldn't apologize, I'd own it. I may regret it but thats part of the mistakes of youth. The main thing is to learn from bad experiences & not repeat them.

[driven159]

yes, and tell them you learned your lesson and tell them you won't do it again

[Anonymous]

Because you made a bad decision and made a bad impression on everybody. You still need to apologize for your stupidity.

[SiberFox]

Apologize for what? Having a good time?

[Asker]

It was trashy behavior. I acted like a total idiot and feel bad about it.

[KrakenAttackin]

Absolutely you should apologize.

[Liuz02]

Maybe not apologise, just recognise it, own it.

[Fuentes]

You got drunk it happens lol

[Anonymous]

Apologizing is the right thing to do.

[Asker]

Yes. It feels awful. They don't like the white party girls. They had a good impression about me before. Now they probably think I'm converting into them because one of them said ''I knew it. She's not the same girl we knew long ago.''
Oh dear what have I done!!! I'm afraid that bad image will stay with them now.

[Opinion Owner]

Try not to overthink the situation.

[Talkingtotheone]

they don't know

[Asker]

They do. When I came back home, they were there and saw me acting like that.

[Asker]

They saw that whole episode.