My first ever dog passed away and no one told me. how do I deal with this overwhelming pain and sadness and grief?

Question

My dog passed away because he got hit by a vehicle at the road. Actually, this could've been avoided. What happened was bc my mother is going to the city for work. No one's at home. And the dog will always follow us everywhere. Now my he followed my mother to the highway (street), and he got hit by a car.

I have always told everyone to lock the gate at our patio and leave the dog inside to avoid him from following us to the roads. My cousins will open up the patio anyways afterwards when we are gonna be out of sight. By today, my mother didn't lock the dog inside the patio (our patio is very big by the way, so it's safe for dogs and it has a gate. But there's also another gate outside) and our dog followed her to the roads and he lost his life.

He was my first ever dog. I have always been SOOO afraid of dogs before. And even until now, I don't like dogs except for my dear Spart. He's my love. I give him a bathe every week or when he needs it. I was doing it alone. He is such a crybaby at bath, he barf so much at bath it hurts my ears, but I'm so happy he trust me enough not to bite me even though he doesn't like it. He hides behind me if the shower is pointed at him. He's a sweet dog, I carry him always because he's my baby. I love him so much. I take him with us to travels.

Spart. I could never find any dog like him. He's so good to me, very obedient! Doesn't eat our food even if it's there in front of him. He waits for us to give it to him. Spart. Our dog. We lost him today. THE WORST PART is my entire family even my cousins know this and they did not tell me. My mother asked them to keep it a secret from me because she knew how i love him. Everyone knows but no one told me. NO ONE. I found out about it because i saw my mother crying so hard while texting my father and I thought father was cheating or something so I got furious and opened my mother's messenger account and there, i found out what happened.

Updates

1 y

My mother was there when he got hit. I don't know what to think. I don't know if I should hate my mother. I don't know. I love my dog so much. He's my first ever dog. I can't believe it. Even now, they still didn't told me. Everyone in our town knows, but nobody told me. NOBODY.

Help. I don't know what to do. I keep crying so much. I'm far from our house, I'm in the city. What do i think. Should I hate my mother? I don't know anymore. This could have been prevented if she kept him inside the

Updates

1 y

This could have been prevented if she kept him inside the patio. My dog. MY DOG!! SPART!! 😭

TrueConfection · Accepted Answer

I have 2 dogs and they are family. It's tragic to lose a beloved and loyal family member.

We had a sweet cat that we used to say identified as a dog. He'd walk my kiddos to the bus stop every morning and greet them at the bus stop in the afternoon. He slept on my son's bed. He chose us to be his family when he was a kitten. He was feral and came to our door. We let him in and he refused to leave.

Anyhow, the day before Thanksgiving, my neighbor found him dead in his yard. We think he probably licked some antifreeze off the neighbor's driveway.

We just couldn't bring ourselves to tell the children right away. We waited until after the holiday. It's so, so difficult to see your child in pain. It's even worse than the grief of losing the pet.

Your mom knows she should have closed the gate. She saw it happen and couldn't stop it from happening. She was probably overwhelmed with grief for Spart and worse is to see your grief. I doubt she knew how she could tell you. It's so hard, but I think you should forgive her and grieve together.

I worry that one of our dogs will pass while my kids are away at their universities. I don't know how I'll tell them or if it's during finals if I should wait or tell them right away. I think about this often.

I'm sorry no one told you about Spart. Someone should have stepped up besides your mom. It was probably too hard for her.

I'm sorry you have to go through this loss. The first day is the hardest and the first week is the hardest week and the first month is the hardest month. Eventually, you'll be able to move forward, but it's okay to grieve and cry and be angry. Please don't hate your mom. ❤

Msputiton · Accepted Answer

*big hugs* I wish i had words that could help you

TheSpaceGnome · Accepted Answer

The fact that no one told you is really fucked up. Losing a pet is like losing a child.

Only time will make you feel better unfortunately, that and either another pet, a good friend, or an SO.

Some people think doing that is treating the pet as replaceable, but Its not about replacement, humans just need something in their lives that loves them.

Aiko_E_Lara · Accepted Answer

Well sorry for your loss. I don't think there is an easy way to get over it but it's ok to give yourself time to relieve yourself and release all your tears and drink plenty of fluid to rehydrate yourself. Keep remembering him and time goes on you will get go over it you will learn to accept it. *Hugs* hope you will do well

collie22 · Answer

I'm so sorry hun

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Omg 😰😢😢😢

My first ever dog passed away and no one told me. how do I deal with this overwhelming pain and sadness and grief?

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