I’m supposed to meet up with someone I haven’t seen in long time but I got 😷 two days ago & im still shaky — feeling guilty but is it ok to not go?

Question

Likely they will be passing through in a few weeks so we can meet up then. Also they promised promised not to make it last minute and they switched the timing from further to closer last minute.. well last minute for me which is less than a two week warning.

So not only am I just getting over being sick but I was caught off guard and I’m not up to it. Literally, I don’t want to throw up on them.

They keep checking to see if I’m going to change my mind.. giving me up to the last minute which is so stressful like I wish they’d just say ok we’ll see you next time.

Anyhow, how terrible on a scale of 1-10 is it for me to not go? I already have them a heads up so it’s not out of no where but I feel bad. But also sick. Plus it’s only been 72 hours- I can still be contagious I don’t even see why they’d want to risk it 🤷🏻‍♀️

Thing is we almost met up several times but didn’t bc of miscalculation on both our parts so I feel like I’m more tipping the scale of fault now— which is not useful but hey that’s where I’m at.

Select gender and age to cast your vote:

Updates

+1 y

Thanks to everyone who answered.

I went it went fine and I’m glad I did. I’d have stayed home otherwise but it’s ok I’m just a bit dizzy. Good to see them! 💕

ChiTown33 · Accepted Answer

Well since this is resolved I guess there's no point in me responding. But I'm going to answer for future reference. And sorry, but my response is situational. Only YOU can truly understand how you feel. And if they TRULY CARE about you they'll understand.

I'm not sure if I mentioned to you before the issues I've been having with my back since my accident. I finally got it looked into and found i have a number of things wrong. I won't go into it. But I've been having trouble standing or even sitting for more than 30 minutes at a time. This makes things like the 4th of July get together (we celebrate on the 3rd) hard for me. My family wants me there but they can't understand how painful it is for me. I tolerate it as long as I can. And I hurt for a day or 2 after because of it. So it's a balancing act. I do it because I probably can't make it worse. And the movement is probably good for it in the long run.

So I guess what i'm saying is, if they care about you they WILL understand if you can't that doesn't mean they won't be disappointed or they won't miss you, they will!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

You are free to do or not do anything you like (providing you aren't harming others etc) for any or even no reason.

So do or not what ever you want.

That's the short answer.

The longer answer is that you aren't sick, you stopped being sick 3 days ago and you presumably didn't have someone that anyone cares about, i. e. you had the common cold, not ebola.

You are already keenly aware that you are a fucking crazy person and have some how failed to understand that they are giving you completely free choice to meet them or not, they probably don't even care about being notified about whether you are going to meet them or not beyond what is logistically necessary for them to function.

You should literally do whatever you want, if you want to see this person then you should state your terms, conditions and time frame etc.

If you don't want to see them then either tell them that or just stop talking to them.

If you are not capable of making a choice then roll a dice or flip a coin.

amazingallegra1 · Accepted Answer

Are you sick enough that if you were on vacation you would end all your plans and go home? Depending on your answer what I will say...

Sevenpointfive · Answer

if you don't want to go then don't. but if you're looking for an excuse not to go then you don't have one. you sound over your sickness and it's up to them to decide whether to risk it. i don't get sick so i'd hate for someone to pull that excuse on me, but i'd take the hint and not keep bugging them about it.

GreatBigCircles · Answer

If you're not feeling well, you're not feeling well. But at the same time, it might just be your nerves telling you you're feeling worse than you actually are. 99% when I feel under the weather and stressed about meeting up with someone, when I actually get to it the stress and the sick feelings go away.

And there's other ways to hang out with people now days thanks to the magic of the internet!

glennos89 · Answer

If you don't feel healthy enough then your should communicate that honestly. It's okay to cancel something if you are really not feeling well.

But if you feel healthy enough but try to avoid this person because you feel nervous, then it's not okay to cancel this meet up! In this case just scrape your courage back together and just go to the meet up anyways. It won't hurt you and it's not going to hurt the other person aswell so try to enjoy the ride 🤷‍♂️

Aakash_Hangargi · Answer

Its ok not to go , you don't want them to feel guilty.

But the problem with you is you never look sick so they won't believe you haha.

But yeah tell that you have that is something infectious so you would like to meet someother time and make sure you do

SnowedIn · Answer

You're totally good! Just be honest and simple with them: "hey, I am so sorry -- I got really sick and I don't want to give this bug to you. Let's get together the next time you pass through". And let it go at that.

Lliam · Answer

I voted "It’s not tragic it’s not even bad its simply you got sick & do not feel well. See them in the re run. " But I'm glad it went well. Yay!

ZXCwWRQWz · Answer

Just do it but tell them if you aren't feeling well and adjust to a comfortable environment. Tough it up, soldier! And risk infecting them with the disease.

RealMarek · Answer

If you’re sick, just tell the person that unfortunately you got sick and don’t feel well enough to meet. You can ask to meet when the person passes through town again.

nolabels · Answer

There's no need to worry about a situation like that.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

From time to time things do happen & it saddens me to hear you are sick & I wish you a speedy recovery as well. As for your meet up just be open & honest with the person or people you are meeting up with & simply ask for a raincheck at this time.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

They're coming back in a few weeks. So what's the issue? They can wait.

humanearth · Answer

I guess the best answer I can give is 50/50 So is this person someone you like in a special way

loveslongnails · Answer

Do a video call with them on WhatsApp, or Skype or Zoom, if you're even interested in talking to them. It doesn't sound like you are?

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Voted to see them in the re-run

Philyouup · Answer

Honesty is the best policy. be up front. i think an old friend would be ok to see, but also deserves to be brought on to a level playing field

ChefPapiChulo · Answer

Do what’s best for you. Learn to say no.

ManHater · Answer

Just do it out of respect.

Dreamclouds · Answer

Never feel sorry for what you feel, it is your soul speaking through emotions so do what you feel there is nothing to feel bad about.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

That's okay shit happens just make it up to them

Jerre · Answer

Just tell them you are sick and can’t make it. Don’t feel bad about it, happens to many of us

MysticDevice · Answer

If you're sick you're sick. They'll understand.

noohair · Answer

You need a paychiatrist.

I’m supposed to meet up with someone I haven’t seen in long time but I got 😷 two days ago & im still shaky — feeling guilty but is it ok to not go?

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