How to make my mom stop "living vicariously through me"?

[Anonymous]

She even told me that she is... She's always in my business and always wants to know where I am or what I'm doing. I am a functioning adult... I really wish she wouldn't have gotten divorced when I was younger. Maybe it would have been easier to let me go because she'd have her own life and her own marriage to focus on. She has a boyfriend now. And is retired. Why doesn't she focus on herself and do her own thing? I don't know how to get away from this. And I will be gaslit...

Updates

+1 y

It really brings on the guilt and also makes me feel like I can't move on with my life

[RoseySaraah]

Your so in the right but really she has no life even with a boyfriend!

My mom did this till I moved off and cut contact and she came and loved next to me!

You won't get her away no matter how hard you try.

What is she pushing for? Either be so boring she finds someone else, get her into TV shows romcoms for Americans, or find her a less boring boyfriend!

My mom backed off after I over shared tmi a few times. Like in detail about our romance making her miss having any real romance before the bedroom

Feel for you girl! #trapped

[provokeesmokee]

My mother did this to me, too, on top of being emotionally and mentally abusive.

I solved it by cutting her out of my life.

I did try making boundaries first, but she never respected them. So, I removed her from my life and began healing.