How can I help my mom and grandma get along with each other? They are always fighting and I can never get them stop?

[Anonymous]

What's worse is I have to listen to my grandma talk Sh! T about my mom behind her back, What can I do to stop this?

[WindAtMyBack]

There is nothing you can do about the fighting, except maybe try to guilt trip them because it negatively affects you (which probably won't work and may backfire).

If they are trying to draw you in, or get you to take sides, make it perfectly clear (no sugar coating) that you will NOT take sides or get drawn into the fight.

This is something that you could potentially make both of them enemies. Tread carefully and distance yourself from both of them in necessary.

Try not to let this affect you too negatively. This sort of thing can really take a toll on you and lead to problems of your own - like drinking or whatever. There are times when it's OK to be selfish and look out for yourself first. This is one of them.

[Zestyassmf1997]

Your best shot to reconcile two parties is to physically sit them down across from each other and firmly arbitrate their interaction. Avoid taking sides. Seek to encourage compromise. Encourage them to seek common ground. Try your best, but be mindful that you can’t get oil and water to mix.

[strateguy632]

so naive. people do not want to talk. grow up.

[rosemilk]

it's not your problem and shouldn't be your problem to fix. just change the subject

[Cutegirl06]

Tell your grandmother you don't like it when she talks about your mother to you.

[NYCQuestions1976]

I know it sucks, but it's not your battle to fight or referee. The most you'll be able to do if they're fighting around you and disturbing you is to generically yell, "Knock it off!" at both of them and then walk away without getting directly involved. Other than that, it's up to them to figure it out.

[strateguy632]

or stay and repeat. "enough is enough" to both of them.

[nawtee_me]

Are the mother and daughter or grandmother for the other side of the family? If it is a mother daughter thing you probably can’t, and if it is an in-law thing your probably can’t either. That is something they will have to do for themselves. You can voice you opinion and let them know how it hurts you to see that.

[Anonymous]

It's not worth it getting involved. I know you think because you're 18-24 you're and adult, and you are. But I promise you even when you're 60 your mother and probably grandma to will still consider you a child.

It's best just to stay out of it altogether. And walk away when they're arguing.

[strateguy632]

too risky. tell each one you are neutral and not against either one. but do not interfere nor take a side even when one is clearly right.

[strateguy632]

for example when one says bad about ma say "i am neutral not against ma" and same for gramma.

[sheikalana]

Every family has its conflicts. I understand you love both of them but I advise you not to interfere in their issue.

[XXblack88]

I don't know if you can stop it. but you can tell your grandma that you don't want to hear her talk badly about your mom.

[Todd9612]

Give them a bottle of wine, and lock them in a room together, they’ll work it out, or beat the crap out of each other. Either way it’ll be resolved.

[deus_ex_sisyphus]

If you enter into a fight eventually you will have to pick a side, so your best bet is to stay out of family drama

[noohair]

You can tell tthem that you want to move out because of the stress. I don't thing it will help. Their issues are solid and deep.

[BarryLiverstone]

You can’t. Best thing you can attempt is when she vents try to change the subject

[boggboss]

You can't do anything about this

[Danny_dan92]

Tell them to duke it out, let it all out or stfu

[KrakenAttackin]

You can't, stay out of it.

[Staximus]

Move out