What to do when when an older family member has dementia?

[Anonymous]

Where we are going through a difficult stage in my grandmother’s life right now where she is coming down with dementia or sundown when the sun goes down. She’s hallucinating and it’s hard she’s anxious. She doesn’t seem coherent sometimes. What can we do besides putting her in a home

[Anonymous]

Well first of all you already know that you can’t argue w her. While it may not be reality to you it is to her. A lot of times patients will think they’re at home, so they may say I would like to go to the living room to watch tv. You can’t argue w her about that. Really impossible to convince her otherwise that she’s not at home. So you try to redirect her. You could suggest maybe well let’s watch tv in here, we have a tv here that’s bigger. Than I can make your lunch, to which you can take a nap after. But it’s good to try to redirect her train of thought. Sometimes we may tell a patient your daughter said it’s ok for you to watch tv in here. She may say oh ok. We’ve had patients try to go to other rooms because they thought it was their bed. You could tell them well there’s a bed in here. This is a much bigger, more comfortable bed. Sometimes it can be hard. I remember sitting w a patient one night who woke up. He started yelling at me. He thought I broke into his house. He was yelling for his son to call the cops. So sometimes it may be necessary for a change of face. Meaning I went out of the room, had one of the female staff come in. He calmed down, expressed his feelings to her but she was able to redirect his attention. Sometimes they just have to give them medication to help them sleep which really is a last resort.

[OtterMan68]

Be very, very patient. They are going to repeat themselves a lot and ask the same question over and over.

Remember, they are not doing it on purpose,

[rosemilk]

actually, a home is the safest place for her. before we put my grandma in a home, she one day got out of the house and started walking around the neighborhood. this is very very common with dementia and Alzheimer's. they can be like toddlers again. if you don't watch them, they will leave or harm themselves accidentally. they can get ran over by a car because they don't really know what's going on. it's seriously safer to be around trained professionals if it is getting this bad.

[laly520]

patience is key also they need special care at such stage

[Bety23]

I going throght it with my dad it so hard my dad stay up all night it not easy

[boggboss]

Getting her constant care apart from that not much

[Agape93]

Take em out back.

[Agape93]

For fresh air, to clarify. Less cars in the back, less noise and still able to get fresh air.