Do you think you were easy on your parents’ ? Just imagine what your kid is going to put you through lol All I can say is kids’ are easiest when they are babies and toddlers when they can’t really talk back to you , but the second they can , be prepared lol But No matter what, your love for your child is the best love you will ever receive in your lifetime , if you love them and and care for them and be there for them , your child will more than likely love you as well for being there for them. I’m sorry to hear the father is a dead beat and took off on you and the baby , but definitely go after his ass for child support. I am happy to hear your father took you back in , but understand your father loves you , he is just scared and nervous for you for having a baby and the responsibility of having a baby to soon in your life. before you were established and settled and being capable of living on your own. So your father is just worried for you and thinks you made a mistake by getting pregnant before being on your own and being established. But once your baby is born , your Dad will more than likely love the baby and you won’t have to worry about him being unsupportive whatsoever , hopefully that is the case. Now that you have family support , you are best to focus on getting your shit together so you can financially take care of your child on your own and do yourself a favor and stay away from guys’ until you are established and capable of taking care of yourself and your child. Don’t depend on any guy to do that for you whatsoever. Guys’ your age are only thinking with their dicks over anything else. So be wise and stay clear of them as much as possible lol
Being a single parent, whether male or female, is one of the hardest things. While women have to carry the baby during pregnancy, men are responsible for taking care of the baby's needs after birth. Raising a child alone is very challenging. One reason is that you can't do what you want when you want to do it. You have to take care of your little one, hoping they play for at least 30 minutes to an hour so you can get some housework done. If you have a remote job, don't expect to avoid interruptions.
Ideally, two people—a male and a female—create a baby and support each other throughout the child's life. However, life can be complicated, and sometimes people enter relationships hastily without considering the long-term implications. When two consenting adults have a baby out of lust rather than love, the child may face a more difficult life. Not because the parent is mean or abusive, but because the parent might struggle to provide everything that's needed or to advance in their own life and career. He or she is duty-bound to provide for that child and may not be able to focus on getting promotions or starting a business unless there is a support system of people who will love and take care of the child.
As the saying goes, it takes a village to raise a child. So, it's important to be thoughtful about whom you choose to be intimate with. Choose a partner who is committed and trustworthy. I'm not saying you shouldn't have sex before marriage, but it's wise to be engaged or in a serious, committed relationship with the person. That way, there's a smaller chance they will leave when things get tough.
Parenting isn't easy but it's so worth it. It's amazing how they can make you mad drive you crazy and have you fall in love all over again within seconds.
It's frightening and it's exciting. It's very endearing. Despite where your mental state is positive or negative I suggest a good counselor or therapist you can create a bond with. It's always helpful to talk to someone who isn't just a friend or family member someone who wouldn't be biased to help you guide you through those ups and downs with parenting.
There will be much on your plate deciding whether you're going to formula feed or breastfeed will you use disposable diapers to follow the trend of those cute little button cloth ones (they saved me money especially when the baby daddy refused to help me". You'll have to face decisions such as where you're going to live because that will determine what school system your kids will go to. You'll face other things such as having to tighten your wallet you might find things go less towards you and more towards your kids but in the end it's worth it.
Also I suggest finding a job that's very flexible, and will suit your parenting schedule. I got lucky I was able to get a CDL license and drive school buses which allowed me to take my children with me so I didn't need daycare and I was making the equivalent of a full time job while working on a part-time.
I know the feeling all too well. I was a single teen mom too; however, I lived alone and rented a room for my son and me while trying to escape my abusive ex. I worked, went to school, would arrive home around 10pm. It did get better. It's amazing that you have the support of family; that at least gives you some financial stability. Take advantage of that help, you just need to have a plan, please continue going to school. If you need more specific advice, you can always send me a message. Best of luck, and congrats! I'm sure you'll be an amazing mother.
I like that your Dad took you back in. could never understand why a parent would do that. A woman friend of my aunt had kicked out her daughter when it happened to her--of a family of 6 siblings. This woman is an every Sunday churchgoer and the hypocrisy just kills me. The daughter was about 17 or 18 at the time. And--she also had asked my aunt for money to help with son, who had gotten a girl pregnant--for an abortion. It was ok for her son--but her daughter got kicked out. Never liked her after I heard about this.
And I'm sorry to rant about that--but as for your question--it gets easier with time as long as your put forward the work it takes to get organized and make sure you have everything your child needs. Quality time is important. I was a single mom of two girls after I divorced their father--who left without warning nor monetary help when I asked for a divorce. It was a sick to e and the girls and they are hurting from that today. Court ordered him to pay for child support, against his will. I will spare the details which were not good, but in the end I did okay, but I remember it was kind of hectic to hold a job and to raise them too. I had help from my mother until she became sick with Alzheimers. Good luck!
Being a new parent, ( mother or father - single or together ) can be overwhelming. A newborn relies on you for EVERYTHING. They can do absolutely nothing for themselves. They also have to be watched constantly if they are not in a safe place like a crib. You can't even go check the mail for a minute without making them safe first.
As they grow, you not only get more used to it, they can do more for themselves. But it will never be easy, just easier than it was. Plus, if someone your age has a baby, you are growing yourself. You will be a different and more mature person in five years than you are now.
What really works well in life... having some plans and goals, taking steps to get there... appreciating those hard steps and celebrating them as you overcome, because that is the life. I know someone that went back to school (nursing) to get degree so could support family because the dad of 3 kids... was a total addict that spent all the savings. Family is essential sometimes. So a path forward you are working towards that will be successful, that will feel good.
caring for a child... be tough at first being new, but get hang of and gets routing. get used to less sleep.
This cycle has played out so many times before, you can get through it... and your dad has some experience.
But it's time to maybe... do some repair work too so don't repeat. ain't the last child...
Thank you for keeping the baby, thank you for loving a small life that has let to enter the world. I can understand life outside a marriage is hard. Since the baby daddy left, I would expect it to be much harder cause having the dad there or another male figure his role is to protect and care for you since. He is the one that put you in this position in the first place. Not say its all his fault but he was the one that (***) well you know. I love talking about life. I have 2 kids of my own. If you need a person that does not judge and listens to how you fell. (by the way not hitting on you just want to show you) I am here for you and your little one. People need people to understand and someone to talk to even if its a stranger it still helps. I know I have to rely on a few close friends from foreign country's sometimes when it rough for me. There are kind and really lift me up. I want to pass that along to people like yourself
It gets harder over time until your kid becomes an adult, then it gets easier.
But only for you.
Your child's life is going to be very difficult and will only improve if they do something to get out of the hole you and your ex put them in.
I don't know what happened, but If you can salvage the relationship into something loving, you should. People sometimes breakup over the dumbest shit, if its one of those kinds of breakups, try to fix it. If he's a dangerous asshole though. then don't.
Well life is hard but you’re really beautiful and I’m sorry you’ve been through a lot. Maybe you made some poor choices in life but so do a lot of people as long as you’re taking responsibility and accountability what matters the most is your baby.
Im sorry that the dad refuses to be in his kids life and you may have long court battles. As well as your dad kicking you out because it’s not only about you at thuan point. He has a grad baby too and maybe he realized that
Realistically if we compare from the start, yes it will get easier, everything is bumpy until your memorize the road. you'll be okay, you look tough, it'll be time consuming but you got this 💪🏼🙏🏼. I give you props for keeping it, not all woman have the character to do that.
Lol. I would LOVE to tell you it does... Perhaps a little when they're in their 20s and out of your house. But raising kids right isn't easy. Just stick with it and know that many of us made it through the endless tough days. Don't let anyone give you shit about your parenting abilities. Hold a united front between yourself and your kids out in public, then if you have to scold them a bit at home you can do so...
No, it does not get easier. That decision can set the path of the rest of your life. It's a huge amount of responsibility to take on alone. A lot of guys will not want to take on that responsibility for another man's child. And a baby daddy who runs away is not going to be a positive resource in your life or the child's. Likely you'll need to chase him in court for child support. Just as likely, he won't have much money as he makes poor life decisions and runs away from responsibility.
If you’re living at home and you’re bringing up baby I’m sure you’ll be fine because you’ll have support. It’s hard work with a newborn but it’ll get easier the more they get older and start school.
It absolutely does get more manageable and less overwhelming over time. You develop coping mechanisms, learn to manage your time more effectively, and build a strong support system.
I hope God protects you. You are a very beautiful woman. You may have made the wrong choices, but I think you can stand strong.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
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Yes, it can get easier being a single mom. You'll learn to manage your time and resources, build a support network, and find joy in your children. But it's also okay if it doesn't always feel easy. You're strong, and you've got this!
it's definitely very difficult... lots of problems and mostly in this situation as single mom... woman have grown their children better than man as just father alone...
. there woman are in higher place after motherhood
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