My mom won't help me out and I am upset, am I being unreasonable?

[Anonymous]

I own a Jeep which did not past inspection because of tires. I had to go buy 2 brand news tires which cost $180. My tags are now dead for my car. I cannot drive the car for fear of receiving a ticket. I still have insurance on it.

I live with my mom who is disabled and in a wheelchair. She got a car which she physically cannot drive. I never drive her car, but she will let everyone else drive it. Anyways, she let me drive the past couple days to take my daughter to school. I have always driven my daughter to school. Her school bus was not picking her up in the mornings even though I went to the school to complain it did not help. So, I said fuck it, I will drive my daughter to school every morning. Her school is only about four miles down the street.

My mother knows my tags are dead on my car and I had to take what money I did have to get tires on my car for it to pass inspection. I help tend to my mom. My mom cannot walk or stand so I have to lift under her to put her on the potty, on the bed. I have to empty her buckets when she makes a bowel movement, everything. I am glad she let me stay in her house, but I go above and beyond because I was homeless living in my car. I will be getting new tags for my car next week so I will not have to ask to drive her car. I don't see why she will not let me use her car for 15 minutes to drop my daughter off at school. I am not a careless or reckless driver. I have driven my car plenty of times to go to the store to get her things she needed or wanted and never asked for a dime for gas. When mom had her surgery, I went to town every day to get her food, medicine or whatever she needed using may car and gas and I was happy to do it. But now that my back is up against the wall, she leaves me hanging.

She will not let me use her car for 15 minutes out the day to take my daughter to school, yet I clean after her bowel movements. I feel so used. Again, I am not a careless driver I do not understand.

[Oliverlogan263]

Dang girl, that sounds like a really tough situation. I can totally understand why you're feeling so frustrated and upset with your mom right now. It doesn't seem fair at all that she won't let you use her car for just 15 minutes to take your daughter to school, especially when you've been going above and beyond to help take care of her.

The fact that you had to spend all that money on new tires for your Jeep just so it could pass inspection, and now you can't even drive it because your tags are expired - that's gotta be so stressful. And then your mom is letting other people use her car, but not you? That's just not right.

You're definitely not being unreasonable here. You've been doing so much to support your mom and help out, and now when you really need a little bit of help from her, she's leaving you hanging. That's got to feel like a real slap in the face.

I know you said you'll be getting new tags next week, but in the meantime, it's completely understandable that you'd want to use your mom's car to get your daughter to school. You're not asking to go on some wild joy ride - it's just a quick trip to school and back. Seems like the least she could do, especially considering all you do for her.

I really hope your mom comes around and lets you use her car for those 15 minutes. You deserve a little bit of help, especially when you're already doing so much. Hang in there, girl. Hopefully this is just a temporary situation and your mom will come to her senses. In the meantime, don't beat yourself up. You're doing the best you can in a tough spot.

[LionBrasa]

She lets everyone use the car, but she doesn't let you use the car to take your daughter to school? She probably doesn't trust you, maybe you did something that she thought was immature. But you have every reason to be upset about this, after all, it's as if you feel excluded too?

[Asker]

I am almost 50 years old. I have been driving since my early 20's. I drive my own car to run errands for her and never ask for nothing in return. I even empty her potty when she uses the bathroom. I don't get paid just a roof over my head. I am so tired and I have to care for her since she can't care for herself.

[LionBrasa]

And where is your husband to help you?

[Asker]

I do not have a husband, never been married.

[David318578]

Did you ask her why?

[Asker]

She just don't want me driving her car. There's no reasoning to it. She let everyone elsr drive it though. I would never have asked if I had the money to buy the stickers for my car. My mothervhates me, she really does.

[David318578]

It's her car, not much you can do about it. Risk driving your own until it's legal or risk just taking hers and hope she doesn't kick you out or call the police.
Or walk your kid to school

[Asker]

I would never take her car. My daughter made it to school.