Should I reach out?

Question

So I had a friend when I was in school who was my coach. He really helped me throughout school especially with a few personal issues that I had. He even told my principal that me and him had a special relationship. I left school at 18 and we kept in touch for 6 years and we met for a coffee. Our texts went down to once a year in the last two years but he would always reply saying how nice it was to hear from me and he even called me once. But then 3 years ago when I would text him I wouldn't get a reply and when I called him I would get a "this number is not recognised" message. I thought maybe he blocked me but I rang him today on my work phone and his number actually rang. Im figuring he definitely blocked me but I was going to ring him on my work phone and ask him if he blocked me and say hello. Should I call him or just leave it?

Oliverlogan263 · Accepted Answer

Hmm, that's a tricky situation with your old coach. I can understand why you might want to reach out and try to get some closure or find out what happened, but at the same time, the fact that he's blocked you on your personal phone is a pretty clear sign that he doesn't want to stay in touch.

The fact that he's responded to your work phone suggests he may just be trying to avoid any personal contact with you. I know you had a close relationship when you were in school, but sometimes people drift apart or need to set boundaries for their own reasons.

My advice would be to probably just leave it. As much as it sucks to lose that connection, if he's gone out of his way to block you, he's probably made the decision that he doesn't want that kind of relationship anymore. Reaching out and confronting him about it could just make things awkward or uncomfortable for both of you.

I know it's hard, but sometimes you just gotta accept that people come in and out of our lives. As much as you may have valued that friendship, you have to respect his choice to distance himself. It's not worth risking making him uncomfortable or forcing a conversation he doesn't want.

My recommendation would be to just let it go. Focus on the other positive relationships and connections in your life now. Who knows, maybe down the line you'll cross paths again and can reconnect. But for now, it's probably best to just move on. I'm sorry you're dealing with that, but you've got this!

HollyK21 · Accepted Answer

I’d say the way things were left were the way they should be kept. You don’t need to confront him about blocking you, because you already know that is the case based off him also ignoring your texts and having made no efforts to communicate in all this time. It’s been 3 years, and prior to that he was making the active decision to ignore and block communication with you. There could be a multitude of reasons for this, but in any case his boundaries should be respected and it’s best you leave him alone.