My boyfriend doesn't want to give my mom a ride to the hospital with us during labor for our first child. Is he wrong or am I wrong?

[Anonymous]

I'm pregnant and have an appointment to be induced today. It's my first baby and I really want my mom to be present but she doesn't have transportation. For a few weeks now she has been asking my child's father/boyfriend to take her places and he feels like it's not fair to him because she isn't asking him she is asking me and it's not my car nor am I the one doing the driving so if I say yes he can do it he feels cornered into fulfilling an obligation even though he has been having car trouble or at times has been getting requests to take mom or sisters to important appointments or events without them having any backup plan. I always tell my family that he might not be able to take them or I directly say no and then HE is the one who feels guilty and ends up taking them around. Today he decided that this is too big of a day to focus on anybody else and that his main concern is getting to our appointment and leaving with the baby without exposing her to too many people so he doesn't want to be obligated to pick up/drop off anybody who wants to visit the hospital including my mom. I TOTALLY understand how important this day is to him and the consideration he is expecting on a big day for him but I'm the one who is having to go through labor and I want my mom there for MY peace of mind and support so I feel like he should pick her up today and drop her off at home if needed because it's what's needed for me to be comfortable during labor-even if it means putting his needs second. If it were any other occasion I would have his back but today I really feel like he should be considerate of what I want and just simply pick her up like she asked.

[HollyK21]

Don’t get me wrong, what’s going on with the car situation needs to be addressed because it is a big, unfair mess. Him being your family’s main source of transportation should’ve never turned into a thing, especially when you know he isn’t a fan of doing that and they don’t even ask him directly when they should.


HOWEVER, he needs to recognize that today, of all days, is not the time to put his foot down. It’s not the time to address these issues or cause problems between himself, your mom and you. This day is about YOU, your mental health and doing whatever you need done to assure that baby is brought into the world happy and healthy. For him to blame his bullshit on your mother having germs is absolutely ridiculous and unacceptable because you know it’s bigger than that. When I think about how close I am to my mom and if I were bringing in her first grandchild, or ANY grandchild there’s not a thing my fiancé could ever say to keep her out of that room. I’d never allow it and you shouldn’t either, it’s fcking petty. I would Uber or LYFT her there if he won’t pick her up and let him watch so he can feel like the jackass he is. Make sure your mom is there, you’ll regret if she’s not on his behalf.

[RedInnocent69]

He’s wrong. If it’s an appointment by inducement, absolutely. If it’s an emergency, don’t stop to pick up mom

[FunkyMonkee]

Yes! HE'S wrong!!

[Aldan1609]

He is