Family & Friends

Why does my mother always speak in a harsh tone every time I make a mistake?

She always does that and it makes me feel awful. Even if I were to admit being at fault and apologize, it's not enough for her. She yells, hurls insults and keeps berating you about your mistake nonstoppable. At times even gets in your face while hurling insults. Sometimes this has even turned into a heated argument, where I couldn't take her verbal rantings anymore and yelled back. I don't even feel like apologizing anymore afterwards. Then she expects the person to be calm (when she isn't) and doesn't seem to understand why her tone hurts someone.

Unlike her, I speak differently. My husband made a mistake the day after Christmas. He took his eyes of our then 7 month-old baby boy (now 8 months old) for a second to pick up a nearby cloth to clean a milk spit-up. In that second he rolled off the bed and bumped into the hardwood floor. We took him to the ER to be on the safe side and he's perfectly fine. He's a very active and healthy boy. My husband had forgotten my rule about never leaving him on the bed not even for a second and if you have to do anything, place him on the crib, strapped stroller or playpen. I just told him that accidents happened and explained what can be done next time. I never insulted, yelled at him nor reiterated the same thing over and over.

I imagine that if I was speaking to my husband on that harsh tone my mother speaks to anyone, he would probably already be feeling trapped and the marriage would turn toxic so fast. I think there are ways to communicate if someone makes a mistake (even major ones) and the way my mother does it is wrong. She knows I hate being spoken in that manner and still does it. Why?

Why does my mother always speak in a harsh tone every time I make a mistake?
Post Opinion