I’m (32F), growing up I was never allowed to date, I was often told it was a sin to date before marriage unless if she (59F) were to pick out someone for me (?). I wasn’t allowed to go to college either, only my brother was. My mother use to say college was only for men, it would be a sin if I were to do something masculine. It wasn’t until I was 22 that I was able to hide enough money to move out.
Every time something good happens to me, naturally I want to share it with my mother.. only, to have my self esteem and heart torn every time. I was recently promoted at work, my mother said “when I was a child, I used her, by having her raise me, to get a head in life”.. I didn’t ask to be born, heck, she would’ve done me a favor if she aborted me or left me for adoption..
I give her money, pay her bills.. she is never happy. She could never love me the same as she does for my brother. She once said in the past that I was her “biggest mistake”, she wanted all sons.
I never tell my mother about my dating life because she will start fights over it (slamming doors, hanging up on me, throwing rocks at my apartment, security caught her once pouring a bag of sugar in my truck). A few days ago, she caught me out and about with the man I’ve been dating. She made such a huge public scene called me a whore and started screaming that I’m going to hell.
She is the only parent I have, but she refuses to go to family therapy, and I just can’t mentally take being treated like this anymore.
Advice? :(
Every time something good happens to me, naturally I want to share it with my mother.. only, to have my self esteem and heart torn every time. I was recently promoted at work, my mother said “when I was a child, I used her, by having her raise me, to get a head in life”.. I didn’t ask to be born, heck, she would’ve done me a favor if she aborted me or left me for adoption..
I give her money, pay her bills.. she is never happy. She could never love me the same as she does for my brother. She once said in the past that I was her “biggest mistake”, she wanted all sons.
I never tell my mother about my dating life because she will start fights over it (slamming doors, hanging up on me, throwing rocks at my apartment, security caught her once pouring a bag of sugar in my truck). A few days ago, she caught me out and about with the man I’ve been dating. She made such a huge public scene called me a whore and started screaming that I’m going to hell.
She is the only parent I have, but she refuses to go to family therapy, and I just can’t mentally take being treated like this anymore.
Advice? :(
