Have you ever had to end a difficult friendship, and what was it like?

Question

What is difficult? How was your experience

bobalife · Accepted Answer

Maybe just two… it’s hard bc when you’re so close for so long… like decade of friendship types really hurt… because you really care about them & never saw it coming.

Female friendship.
I was one of her bridesmaids and we were college friends. She even told me I’m like a bestie to her and I love her family & vice versa. Sadly she’s an alcoholic and it plays a huge role of her divorced in 2024… and some of her bad behaviors… which most I put on the side bc I really loved her as a friend. End of 2024 to early 2025, I was on winter break from graduate school and she was officially divorced.. we went out.. we met some guys and I was hitting off with this really cute guy… we went off on our own for abit, but when we came back… my friend was just super drunk… she said a lot of weird things, got really loud, whispering to the guy I like’s ear, and even initiated holding hands with the guy I was hitting off with… just weird stuff, but that’s cutting girl code. She wouldn’t stop sayin how cute he was after we left them. If anything, I told her I would believe what she say over him. But she denied recalling much that night and why she did it. I know that’s not true… I asked her many times why she did it and what she said, but denial after denial. I told her it really shocks me and hurts me she would do that when I clearly was into him and we were hitting it off. She couldn’t acknowledge my feelings and the fact she hurt me. She has very poor accountability even when she hurts the people she loves including myself and I didn’t think she would ever do things like that. We got into an argument about it, and she told me she even told her bffs/fam about it who said I shouldn’t need to feel how I feel. It’s so uncomfortable she told them all the details and continuing to dismissed me. she said we should take a “break” If I wanna be friends, I should reach out to her. Lmao. Like girl, what? It should be the opposite. I didn’t block her but I did removed her and her family/bffs from my social media because it just felt like invasion of privacy after she told them really personal things. I was super busy, stress out, and got no time to think about what happened while being in an accelerated program in graduate school. But now that I’m finally done and got time to really think about it… I still have love for her, miss her and our friendship, but I know better that true friendships don’t do that to you… they don’t hurt you, betray you and break girl code, dismissed your feelings, they would acknowledge their mistakes and grow with you… I realized this friendship is no longer serving me, my values, and where I’m at in life. Also, I just can’t trust her anymore after what happened.

Male friendship is another long story. But at the end of the day, sometimes, these friendships are just seasons despite the length of friendships, no longer serving you, and aligns with your value of genuine friendships. Are you going through a rough patch with friendships or do you have any stories?

Cutegirl06 · Accepted Answer

I had a friend in high school who turned out not to be a friend at all. One day she came over my little brother was outside playing, I heard him screaming! I went outside and she was dragging my brother by his hair. I grabbed her hair and asked her how she liked it. From that day on we were never friends again. I don't know what she was thinking when she dragged him by his hair, she never did it again!! She has since moved away thank God 😊

Maybe_Maybe_not · Accepted Answer

It was difficult, as difficult as ending a relationship, maybe even more because I never imagined I would have to end a friendship before I actually had to.

It was a strange thing to me because I thought friendships were eternal connections, that they were low intensity and chill so there was no reason to get to the point of ending one.

I ended it because I realized, one day, that this friendship wasn't doing me any good anymore. I realized that a friendship is a relationship, in the sense that you can feel wrong in it. Like really wrong.

Telekinetic-Potato · Accepted Answer

Ya, he just slowly became disrespectful. This was back in the 7th or 8th grade. I gave him too many chances because he did so much for me I felt like I owed him extra patience and we had an argument he said "fuck respect, I don't need to respect anything"

And I said "that's fair, but I don't need to stop myself from bashing your head in"

And I slapped him in the face with my WII he smashed and Sparta kicked him onto my porch and then I told him he better not break anything on the way out. Which he tried to.

I got Chinese food after that

ChasingSophie · Answer

Ended one about three years ago. I'd been quietly doing the maths on it for ages, noticing how I always left her place feeling vaguely worse about myself, but she was one of those friendships that felt load-bearing. We'd been close since first year of uni and I think I confused length with depth for a really long time.

The actual ending was anticlimactic. No confrontation, just... I stopped initiating and she didn't either and eventually we just weren't in each other's lives anymore. I thought that would feel cleaner than having a conversation about it. It didn't, really.

Anonymous · Answer

i wouldn't say that i ended it myself rather these kinds of friendships seem to end over something at some point it seems

can recall this really difficult friend i had decades ago , not sure what his problem was but he never did well in school and went on a disability when he turned of age. i'd sort of like drive him around and we'd go places but it was like awkward and i didn't really like him much , sometimes he'd even roll down the window and yell at people on the streets it was like crazy

its not like we broke up but eventually at some point we stopped hanging out and he moved to another city a couple hours away so i don't see him anymore.

Levin · Answer

Exactly like the anon below.

There was a female friend I had. We'd talk for hours a day, but whenever I wanted to do anything in person, she was like, nah. She had a boyfriend and I guess I was some kind of emotional dumping ground. But yeah, we got on stupidly well. If we met at 12pm we'd still be chatting and flowing, without any awkwardness, for 12 hours after.

I fucked it off out of some basic self respect.

Master_Debator · Answer

I've had to do it a lot actually. I just do the same thing I do to chicks that I want to go away so I can bang her friends... I become so annoying and judgmental that they make themselves go away. If they try to come back, ignore them, until they go away again.

Anonymous · Answer

I had a guy best friend, we could tell each other anything, really deep stuff about ourselves we had never told anyone else (he's been married for 12 years and told me stuff he could never in a million years tell her) but we got feelings for each other because of all the venting we did about life to each other and had to end things. It totally gutted me. I'll never have another friend I can talk to like that. I may never totally get over not being able to talk to him.

tiredandgrumpy · Answer

i have the problem of people saying we are friends and we aren't. Their lifestyle is not that i would ever want to be associated with. We are not friends and they are always saying we are, makes my skin crawl

KostasKouvalis · Answer

I HAVE, but if it's "difficult", it means it wasn't really a "friendship" to begin with.

Sweetdreams1950 · Answer

I was happy that the excess had been removed from my life.

NathanDavis · Answer

fortunately... no

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