His eyes sparkle when he looks at me.

[songbirdkittymeow]

This guy and I have never officially dated, but I'm pretty sure he was interested in me at least at some point in time. I have been interested in him for about two years now and I have no idea why he has captured my heart. Anyways, I don't get to see him very often, but every time he looks at me his eyes have so much intensity and they sparkle. It is almost like his eyes say what his lips won't or are afraid to say. I swear he looks at me like when a guy sees his first Lamborghini. He is very shy though. He has also done and said some tell-tale things in the past that gives me clues that he very much has been paying attention to my likes, dislikes and remembers a lot of things I have said in the past. I would love to go after him myself and pursue him, but I pointed out the pink elephant a year ago and that didn't go as I had hoped. He said he wasn't looking for anything at that time and we were just friends, but admitted he had considered there being more between us as well. He avoided me for awhile after that, but now things are back to normal. And the way he looks at me... his eyes say everything, but nothing happens. What in the world is going on?!

[torog]

Hi Lamborghini,

It is very possible that he said he wasn't looking for anything at that time because he is inexperienced and doesn't know how to handle a relationship. He is afraid. You might try to make this relationship grow more subtly, without words. Just set a situation where you will eventually kiss and your relationship will get going.

This might be over simplistic but that's my guess as I don't know him or have enough details about your relationship.

[songbirdkittymeow]

Thanks for the advice! I guess what stumps me is that in my mind, he shouldn't be afraid of rejection because I put my cards out on the table and if that wasn't enough to make him figure out that I was interested in him, then I don't know what else it would take. I know he is probably afraid, but I am a genuine woman and he knows that... wouldn't that be enough for him to give me a chance? You'd think... I"m not a widow spider...lol

[torog]

He isn't afraid of being rejected. He knows you are interested in him. But he is afraid of losing your interest once you'll know more about him. He probably believes that you won't be understanding of his lack of experience and that he will lose all his chances with you if he doesn't do interesting stuffs while you'll be together in the long run. Stuffs couples do.

That's what usually happen but I may be wrong about him.

[songbirdkittymeow]

I know this is purely speculation on your part, but that actually makes a lot of sense! Thank you so much! I'm not really sure how to bring up the topic with him, but if it ever comes up, I will try to drop clues that I don't care about his lack of experience or that I don't mind a guy with kindof a clean slate. Actually, I find it a bit refreshing... I'm interested in him because of who he is which is someone with character. I'm also very patient, if they give me something to work with

[torog]

Thank you for the best answer :)

What do you do when you are together? Mostly casual friendly stuffs? Where do you go and how often do you see each other?

[TheUglyOne]

He's not ready, for what ever reason, don't know him so I couldn't say why, to make the step to be in a relationship. But he definitely likes more than friend, and wants to "hold" on to you.

[songbirdkittymeow]

Thanks for your input! Do men like this ever get up the nerve to pursue the woman? I never know how to act around him... usually I am myself (which is goofy, playful, and laugh a lot), but so many times I want to make more of the time we have together, but he never seems to catch the drift. Grr...lol

[TheUglyOne]

lol "men" do, but boys usually don't. Maybe just surprise kiss him on the lips. Nah, just kidding, but you could try light touching, and maybe bring up directly lol.

[songbirdkittymeow]

Lol, that's an idea... and believe me, I've thought about kissing him... lol... many times...lol I guess a big part of me is sick of being the aggressor and wants to be pursued. I don't want it to be a situation where he likes me because I've conveniently fallen into his lap. Yay me...Not! Thanks for all of your input! :)