Crush on a underage girl, what do I do to get over it?

[Anonymous]

I had a crush on a girl at work and when I asked her out she said sure. I thought she was 18-20 I'm 24 so I figured 4-6 years age difference isn't too much.

I was talking with her online later that week and she asked me how old I was I said 24 and asked her and she said she was 14 and that she doesn't think we should be seeing each other with 10years age difference. I agreed with her but was very embarrassed because I thought she was almost 20.

she said she understands that I thought she was older witch made me feel more at ease but I see her a few times a week at work and I think I still have a crush on her even though I now know how old she is. what do I do to get over the crush and how do I talk to her or even act around her?

PS: I'm not a pedophile so I wouldn't do anything to her now that I know how old she is.

Updates

+1 y

girls can answer too and anyone that has had a crush on someone only to find out later that they are underage

[iwbym]

i had the same problem I was 19, she was 15, of course 4 years isn't much difference, but when its illegal, it kinda is, haha

i basically just moved on, there's a girl there, whos 19, I'm now 20, that I like, so yeah, blue is right about just moving on, until you do though, just try to avoid her as much as possible, after all the more you see her, the more you think about her (remember us guys are visually turned on)

[sadnddepressed]

ok when I was 18 I dated a girl who was 15. I didn't know she was 15 but she was extremely immature even though her first impression led me to believe otherwise. I guess my advice is...there int any. point blank she's 14 and that should be a turn off alone. Seriouly just forget about it.There's nothing to have a crush on. You said it yourself. Start thinking of her as a little sister if anything.

[Asker]

Makes scene to think of her as a little sister. that way I won't be thinking of her in any other ways.

thanks

[sadnddepressed]

No problem. To this day I still talk to that girl and I protect her like a sister. You'll be alright.

[Asker]

Thanks. I guess I never knew how important asking someone there age before you ask them out was tell now.

[scnbabe89]

Shes not underage if she's 18 or over that's what the law says anyway so just ask her out if she's 18 or over.

[SSLAG]

He said she turned out to be 14. D:

[blueyedgrll]

first off where do you work where a 14 year old is legally allowed to be employed?

[Asker]

Alberta canada. there are soo many jobs here they had to lower the working age so there will be more workers. in other provences ligal working age is normal thow and jobs are harder to find.

[blueyedgrll]

Gotya. well the best thing to do to spoil a crush is to find a new one. You're really just going to have to slowly change how you two act around eachother. Just treat her as if she were only a friend. After you speak to her that way for so long it will only begin to feel natural. Due to her being underage you know legally you can't have her, so it will only make you want her more. (wanting what you can't have). Give it time and talk to some new girls, things will change in a couple weeks.

[Asker]

Thanks. :) I think I know what you mean by wanting what you can't have. I'll try to find someone else to crush on.

[Marrryyyyy]

try to think of yourself as a brother figure with her

[WaitingAtTheDoor]

Here's how you accomplish this.

You remember the number "14," every time you see her. Everytime you think of her, you say to yourself "14."

Then, you do something like go to a bar, and hit on women in the bar. Even if it doesn't go anywhere, it will get you to stop thinking about underage girls, and get you to go after women your age.

And stay away from her. That's another key point.

[Asker]

I'm not into underage girls like I said I'm not a pedophile it's just this one girl. I'll try the method of thinking 14 every time I think of her and hopefully my mind will realize it should stop thinking of her.

also I don't like bars (drunks are annoying)

[WaitingAtTheDoor]

The point of the bars is to get you to focus on finding a woman anywhere else but work. If you don't like bars, seek out a speed dating service in your area.

Ask your friends to set you up on blind dates, anything to get this really bad idea out of your head.

[Asker]

Bad idea? I'm not thinking about being with her or doing anything perverted. just the feeling of the crush I had before I knew her age is still LINGERING behind. I'm sure it'll go away eventually.

[WaitingAtTheDoor]

Yea, a crush on an underage girl is a bad idea, because it's a feeling associated with a thought created in your brain.

By definition, it's a BAD idea. And I'm not saying you're going to do anything, but you better start thinking about it on those terms.

And it will go away the more you occupy your brain with thoughts about other, of age women.

[Asker]

I know it'll go away. I've had crushes on of aged women before that went away when I realized they had a boyfriend or something like that just takes me some time because I'm one of those weard guys that put a lot of emotion into a crush.

[kinetochore714]

It's illegal, but technically it's not pedophilia just to clarify. It's lecherous. Pedophiles are sexually attracted to children while lechers are attracted to young (to very young) teenagers. By law someone is a "child" till 18 most places but biologically one isn't a child anymore after coming out of puberty. Just thought I'd throw that out there. Still very illegal, and ya little sister idea is good. Though knowing how young girls work she might eventually be the one coming on to you.