We're playing phone tag and she wants me to leave her a message?

[Anonymous]

So this girl I'm trying to ask out, we both work at the same place, I've been calling her but she isn't there (people are often away), left a message to call me back. She called me but I was away. So I called her back and left a message to call my cell number. She called but it went straight to voice mail saying that I should call her and just leave a message.

I want to ask her out. Should I keep calling or wait until tomorrow or ask her out via message?

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Well----hrm..--did you find out she's single?

ask her if she has time after she picks her mom up, met up with her if she has time and I say (do the confession) Tell her "you are interested in being more then friends" "tell her you don't want to scare her because it's like so soon but its just that you are leaving "tomorrow" and I want to see if there would be a chance. (I mean that's just want I'm recommending )

Or if you feel like ---it's not really worth it ---(b/c it will eventually turn into a "long distance thing" if it works out ...so I mean is that something? ...and semi long distance can have a lot more problems. like not having enough time to see each other, sometimes trust, etc...

so I'm just saying, ...how much do you like her and if you really like her...go for it and confess and see where it took you, you did get her to talk to you so it's a good sign but ...i mean if you do confess, don't like freak her out tho. ..and I recommend in person to confess, doing it on line or like texting or like talking to her is kinda like "impersonal" but that's just me tho... ..good luck! Hope everything goes well. ...i mean you did say she's leaving tomorrow so don't miss the chance!

[Asker]

She's leaving today (Friday). She couldn't come last night, so oh well. But she said she'll see about lunch today. She texted me that she thinks her coworkers are taking her out to lunch so she doesn't think she can sorry. I texted back to Have fun with them and enjoy her last day. I just don't want to come off too pushy. I thought about asking "So when are you free in the short term?" or maybe "Keep in touch" or something to that effect.

[Asker]

She did text just now that if she was in the area before she goes to school next week, she'll let me know.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Eh-well its kinda up to you-------

I've had people that I liked--but they weren't being "persistent" enough and held back a lot and it kinda bugged me because I didn't know what they wanted. ..(and I didn't want to ask them if they had a thing for me or not)

but I had guys that were the exact opposite and I ended up dated them instead. Because I could tell and if I liked them I accept if I didn't I reject. So---yeah....maybe you just text her and tell her how you feel? or ..whatever floats your boat :)

[Asker]

She replied to me that she'd let me know when she is around, hopefully next week. I replied with, sure, and some stupid math thing, "remember that pi day is not sponsored by the bakery". Its a math major thing.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Lol-your "pi" reply is funny :)

anyways- ..hope this can blossom for you...and don't think to much...if it happens it will happen...

u already told her how you feel...and ...if she likes you she will show some signs or something and when she does take action and don't let go okay? hehhe

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Do you guys have text? maybe you can text her instead?

You can keep calling but--phone tag is a tad bit annoying after awhile

You should ask her out in person- (or in your words "tomorrow" when you see her @ work.)

[Asker]

No, I don't have her personal phone number just work number. I don't know where she is. We met at a guy's office, and I saw her at lunch one day, and at a picnic. So I asked the guy if he had her number and that's how I called her. The big problem is she's going back to school soon (days maybe weeks). So I have this it needs to be done today mentality!

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Hrm -well you are in a very sticky situation.

if its a work number- didn't think it's a good idea to leave a message..it it her extension only for herself? -if so Leave a message. If not then NO

if all fails and you don't see her today or tomorrow and you keep calling you can't find her.....

try looking her up on Facebook or MySpace-

[Asker]

She isn't on Facebook or MySpace, or at least I can't find. The company directory has her personal email and I think personal phone number but I'd rather get those right from her instead. We met at this guys office, I saw her in there and introduced myself. I saw her at lunch eating by herself so I invited her to eat with us. And saw her at this picnic and she told me the name of the guy I couldn't remember. I asked the guy (whose office we were in and met) if he had her number. She's like a sec

[Asker]

He found her through the guy she works for (that he knows). She also works as like a office admin and the number.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

I know you want to ask her personal number and e-mail from her- but if all other fails you don't see her now until whenever then maybe you can try looking up her e-mail (it doesn't hurt to try) and then ask her out or ask her her personal number afterward. it can be a bit creepy but if you are all out of ideas then that's my best advice

or you can ask around and see if anyone might know that girl.

[Asker]

Her school is like 3 hours away from here. So she'll be "leaving" basically. That's why I'm in such a rush but I don't know if I should make it like its the only thing.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Okay ask yourself this-

say you ask her out- you guys date everything seems right but she leaves for school- are you willing to have a semi long distance relationship? 3 hrs is kind of far when it comes to driving.

you know nothing about her what if she looks pretty but she's nothing of what you expected?.. ...

And are you thinking long term short term? just date for fun? ....b/c those are things you should consider ..especially - if its like 3 hrs away.

[Asker]

I just want to know her a little bit. Even if its for a short bit of time and even if nothing comes out of it. I've talked to her a bit and she's really nice, friendly and polite.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Then I say look her email up and see where it takes you-

e-mail her tonight and see what she says--plan a date to met ether @ work or outside of work-- and start from there...

say " hi my name is ----" ...I work with you--I introduce myself to you--- remember? and then say ...I hope I don't come off as being creepy but ...and then go from there.

i had someone do that to me-- I had class with him and we did a group project together and after like a year he found MySpace and he jogged my memory of

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Who he was --we talked--he never mad a move so we stayed friends--but its pretty similar- because I was like "wow" creepy but flattered. ...so it's something you can try.

[Asker]

Yes, I kinda feel like I did that with her phone number, asking the guy, who asked her boss. The guy then asked her if it was okay that he give me her work number. He trumped it up like she really wanted me to call but who knows. Otherwise she would of left a message to me to give me her personal phone number.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Yeah- she would have given you her "personal phone number" ----maybe it's not worth your time?....

and sorry btw I have a question too---in need of some urgent advice....do you mind reading it and see if you can give me some suggestions?

[Asker]

Yes, I'll check your question out. Should I just call and leave a message, be like "Hey, I was wondering when you were leaving for school because I'd like to take you out to this Sushi resteraunt..." I really thought she might be into me, she was laughing at all my jokes, smiling, playing with her earring. But I am usually wrong about this sort of thing.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

...you have nothing to loose --give it a try and see where it takes u--it you don't try you will never know :)

and thanks

[Asker]

Sometimes I feel like it has to be done "right" and I want to ask her directly and not through some message. But that may be the only way?

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Well I mean- you call- she doesn't pick up

she call back and you miss her call.

...she has no real contact for u

u have to get her number and e-mail with other sources

so you are really out of options

unless you wait for her...unless she has a place she hangs out..

is she even single tho?

[Asker]

I don't know, I really don't know her. I actually saw her go into the other building, so I followed her and introduced myself. She seemed really nice and cordial and someone I wanted to know (I don't do this often). At lunch, she was all by herself. I had to break the ice, so asked if she remembered the guys name at the office (where I met her). She said she couldn't remember but I made her laugh and she came over to join me. She was laughing at my corny jokes.

[Asker]

At the picnic she was with some other girls, but kept looking in my direction (we were standing in line and I was with a girl from my office). I went over to her and said that our line was moving faster and we beat her to the food. She laughed and said she remembered that guys name. She looked really sweet, but I had to go because I was with another group.

I saw her at lunch by herself but she was on the phone, I waved Hi and that was it. So I have no idea but it felt like she was available

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Shoot her an e-mail or leave her a message-- and see where it takes u. ...like I said--you have nothing to lose and ...if it fails take it as a learning experience and if it doesn't then kudos to u.. :)

[Asker]

Thanks. What would be my learning experience? The girl doesn't like me?

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Your learning experience- is knowing what to do and what not to do if you encounter the same situation.

ie if you like another girl and something similar happens you can be like "ah huh" I know what to do.

and thaxs to you back. hope everything go as planned.

[Asker]

So I left her a message. I had to write out what I was going to say first. I called and asked when she was going back and that I'd like to go out with her before she goes. If she was available to give me a call back at my cell number, and if not, good luck to her with school. I didn't think she'd call.

So she called me and left a message (go figure). She told me she is done this Friday but goes back next week. She said we should work out a time for lunch. I'm going to call back and say dinner

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Awesome!-- I'm glad to hear -:)

[Asker]

We finally talked on the phone and it was great. I couldn't talk long, she left work and I was still at work. But she is such a sweetie, she was so laughy and giggly. She went to her friends tonight, I asked what she was doing. I guess she's got a going away party Friday night, her mom is coming back from the airport and Thursday something is going on, and she's going away this weekend. I said if she was done at her friends to maybe give me a call tonight to see about doing something. Well see

[swtlostchingrl82587]

sounds like a good beginning :)

keep it up ..:)

[Asker]

I hope so. She's leaving for school so I won't get to see her. She told me she's coming back in December... I would like to keep in touch. Should I call her tomorrow?

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Hahha- it's up to u-

I think you should--if you guys have a "click" I say go for it (but take it slow tho) (that's probably my only suggestion

[Asker]

Well, I want to see if we can do something. I don't know if I should seem too eager? Call too much? I kinda threw the ball in her court to call me.

[swtlostchingrl82587]

Well-- what is is that you want to do? -- I say take it slow --don't like push it too much if you do you might just end up scaring her.

Just ask if she wants to hang out and .....if you guys do ---just like go step by step don't ask her to hang out to much in one week ---by experience-- because then you would be moving to fast and if she likes you--she'll ask you to hang out if she has time.

[Asker]

Well, she is leaving tomorrow and going back to school. She says we can meet up in December? So I called her tonight to see if she wanted to go to this party. She said she would except her mom is coming in and she has to pick her up from the airport. So I texted her that its basically on the way to the airport.

I'm throwing a hail marry because I might not see or talk to her more. I want to take things slow and easy but we won't get to hang out if I don't push to do something once. I think?