Guys, why would he start to talk to me after he rejected me?

[Anonymous]

Okay so i've been checking out this guy for a very long time, (a year) im shy and he's shy too and since the first time he notice me looking at him he has been looking back at me the same way. we always lock eyes and he never avoids it.

i have even cought him staring at me so many times when i wasn't even looking his way, so i know he's just not looking back when i look at him.

The thing is tho i don't understand him at all.. my friend resently told him that i like him and he said that he has a girlfriend and doesn't want to cheat.

after this he started to say "hi" and "goodbye" and stuff like that to me and he has never done that before. it was like he got a rush when he found out that i like him.

I mean does he like me? or would a guy do all this if he didn't? what do you guys think?
and also, do guys keep looking at girls they aren't attarcted to?

[FreshOutaIdeas]

Funny, as a fella who's in fairly recent times experienced the same/very similar, maybe I can help you out...

For me, I was (am) the confident one, found myself attracted to a girl that seemed shy, lots of her eyeing me without me noticing, awkward convos here and there, her getting all embarrassed when I complimented her etc etc... It was all pretty obvious. I eventually got round to calling her out, and she was clearly happy about it... Smiling, feeling the sexual tension, she then says she can't as she was in a long distance relationship... So I left it there. But months went by and she would become even more flirty (aa far as a "shy" gal can take it anyway). I've actually been ignoring it, shrugging it off, and she got upset when she found out I've been taking out lots of other girls...

Again its still pretty obvious that she likes me, and as a girl you can tell me u think I'm wrong! But take from my little story this: this little dude eyeing you after finding out you liked him, most likely means he does indeed find you attractive, full stop.

It's up to you to take just a little more initiative if you think he's potentially worth it, you'll never fully know until you find out. Just flirt a LITTLE BIT, see if he reciprocates, if you two hit it off tell him to get rid of the other gal ASAP. You (and more so him) don't wanna create a circle jirk of hate and awkwardness...

[Asker]

thanks, he was actually eyeing me long before he knew i liked him, he has been doing it since i've started checking him out like a year ago.

[FreshOutaIdeas]

Np girl! Hate to see someone get duped (discouraged) by other beta-ass comments!

Wow, lol does sound similar to my story! I think you've answered your own question there! Like I say, nobody will ever know until one of you finds out what the others even remotely like. He may well be hitched up, and genuinely unhappy, but a decent guy. Or its a "shy" defence mechanism (as I've experienced as a defense mechanism/jealousy tool from you birdies). Anynow good luck if you persue it.

[Max1410]

There can be two explanation, as I understand this. One that he is telling the truth. He has a girlfriend and he doesn't want to cheat on her. It may sound odd to you, but majority of the guys tell truth when it comes to relationship status. But he is also attracted to you, aa you said. He is feeling bad of having turned down a girl who is attracted to him. Afterall he is happy inside that there is a girl who loves him. That's why he is probably checking you out of you are checking him out or not.
Second possibility is that he is lying. He might have been lying to his friends, or is secretly liking somebody else and suddenly your prospect popped up. He couldn't assemble his thoughts and responded in a normal defensive way. Now he understands that you love him and it is a good thing. He is checking you out and he will soon approach you. If this is the case, you will progressive approach from his side. If so, sit back and relax, hebis coming to you.
If he is not coming to you, then that would mean that you'll have to approach him and talk face to face about his feelings.
It's my opinion, I am not an expert. All the best.

[Splithead]

He's shy. A shy guy is used to likeing girls he never speaks to. He's empathizing with you and doing what he wished his unrequited loves would have done for him. Also it is a rush for people in general to know you're liked, more so if it doesn't happen often. People will often feel secure when someone is into them and feel stressed when they move on. Also from the moment he found out You liked him, he's probably been trying to build you up in his mind and see your good sides, he may have succeeded.

Bottom line is, people who don't have others fawning after them respond to positive attention with positive attention, not aloofness.

[Asker]

but do you think he's into me? or why else keep looking at me? he didn't know that i liked him before he just found out and he has been locking eyes with me and staring at me when i wasn't even looking. and also everytime i cought him staring he would turn away really fast lol

[Asker]

I mean that he has been looking at me and all that way before he knew i liked him

[Splithead]

I told you why. Even if he's not into you he will want you to still be into him. It's the same as the feeling you get when you walk past a store window while wearing a new outfit, that urge to look at your reflection. He's hyper aware of you now and more importantly of how you see him. It's a positive way that you see him so he's either trying to see you in that way or trying to reassure himself that you still see him that way. He probably won't talk to you until after you're over him. Guaranteed.

[Asker]

so if i act like im over him you think he will come talk to me? i mean if i stop looking at him and pay no attention to him he will se a difference in my behavior

[Asker]

cause since the first time i saw him there has not been one day that i haven't checked him out at least once a day, and im gonna stop giving him that kind of attention

[Splithead]

Depends on him. It may make him approach you or it may just make him feel bad, like he let you down. Depends on how rare it is that someone likes him

[LouisKereopa]

Well he knows you have a crush on him. So you he focuses on you more. He has 2 main choices. To ignore you completely so he doesn't get tempted away from his G/f. Or to at least get to know you a little. Before deciding if he'd prefer to be with you over his current girlfriend.

You have given him a confidence boost. If you think he is worth trying to take. Just talk to him, but this could cause trouble.

[Asker]

but do you think a guy would keep looking at a girl if he wasn't attracted to her? even if the girl was the one who started this?

[LouisKereopa]

I think he thinks about you because he is curious about you. The only reason he would be curious is because he has interest in you. And guys are usually interested in girls they find attractive. He said he doesn't want to cheat, which kind of suggests he wanted to fuck you. The only thing stopling him was his commitment to his girlfriend. The only way not to cheat is for him to break up with her

[Asker]

you think so? cause since he rejected me i've been thinking that maybe i have just been making shit up in my head, and that he was never into me.

[Asker]

and by the way, he is not at all ignoring me, he looks at me even more that he did before

[LouisKereopa]

You can't count him being faithful/not instantly dropping his girlfriend his has known a lot longer than you as rejection. Unless he lied. about having a girlfriend. although I doubt he did

[Asker]

I know, i haven't seen him for 3 weeks cause he has been on vacation, and he found out that i liked him only two days before he was leaving so he didn't have much time to think i guess. but i doubt he will do anything different when he sees me again...

[Asker]

but he at least knows now that i like him so it's up to him now.

[LouisKereopa]

You are young, if you feel like he is worth going after. Just add him on social media and be like hey. If you are able to get him to like you enough to leave his current girlfriend. Then they weren't really going to last anyway.

[LouisKereopa]

No, he is shy. Shy people are usually more kind. He probably won't want to hurt her unless he knows you are very keen on him.

[Asker]

i know but i feel like if he wants anything from me he has to be the one doing something, im not gonna try more than i alredy have.. i feel like a fool. and also he's gonna think that im totally desperate because i know now that he has a girlfriend.

[Asker]

but i've been locking eyes with him for months and told him that i really like him, what more can i do?

[Asker]

and also i get really insecure about if he even likes me

[LouisKereopa]

Don't, just add him. If he accepts your friend request. He accepts it knowing you have a crush on him. You are only human it is not like they are married. and 18-24 is still young. He approached you and said hey knowing you liked him. So it seems like he at least showed something. I wouldn't have talked to a girl that had a crush on me if I was with someone I wanted to be with for a very long time

[LouisKereopa]

you aren't going to find out if he really likes you by never talking to him properly. And if you haven't talked it is pretty hard to judge if you like someones personality

[Asker]

he is actually 29 and his girlfriend is 25, and i am 24. but they have only been together for 2 years.
Well would you make constant deep prolonged eye contact with another girl? cause that is what we have been doing for months.
im just really confused about this whole thing..

[LouisKereopa]

Maybe just ask how serious he is about his current relationship. ask him why he keeps looking at you and if he likes what he sees. etc You seem to have a lot of interest in him. you may as well ask a few questions about it. To know if you should move on.

[havfodore]

shy guys belong to the nice guys category, so most probably even though he rejected you because of his girlfriend, it is obvious that he would be happy to be your good friend. he is just curious about you (so he stares). this happens to girls too, they never accept proposals for the 1st time but still try to be good to the guy whom they rejected. it is just a decent way of making a person feel okay even though he/ she is being rejected.
be his good friend or may be get to know his girl.

[Asker]

so you don't think he was ever attracted to me?

[havfodore]

may be he thinks you are creepy and "why the heck she even stares at me?"

OR you are his plan B ! incase his 1st one turns out to be a bitch who left him for some other dude. He will want you to enter his life.

if a guy has a ferrari and someone offers him a bmw why wouldn't he take it? he would at least stare at it 😋

[havfodore]

if his girlfriend gets angry or irritated when y'all both make an eye contact ! you better not break their relationship by involving with him, it would be great if you would move on and find someone else.

[Asker]

but shouldn't he be avoiding me then? and not return eye contact

[t_maq]

if a guy see he is definitely attracted to you. the thing is in which way for one nigt stand to long relationship. now this depends if he started looking to you after he or his friends noticed u seeing (in this case one night stand) or if he just saw u and felt the need to of staring at you and go in deep thoughts (long relationship) or. in between

[jasonstav]

No no he's just being friendly as he doesn't want to be awkward I promise you

[Asker]

but he has been looking at me for months before he even knew that i liked him..

[DrMouse]

He probably likes you. But since he has a girlfriend he's not really doing anything.

[DaddyBear]

as for the last question, it depends. I had quite a similar situation, but my friends told a shy girl that a shy myself likes her. after that I did not say to much to her and even almost did not say a word... but gratings cold mean nothing

[Jayson101]

probably just doesn't know what to do or how to approach you. You KNOW it's the girlfriend factor and is being careful. Deep down you know this

[xharve]

nope, guys definetly dont sare at girls they did'nt find attractive. He said he doesn't want to cheat but i think he doesn't want to continue relationahip with her either.

[beetle2]

maybe they see what they are missing or think maybe they be happier