Why do girls only go for outgoing guys?

[Anonymous]

It seems like girls only look for the really outgoing guys while guys don't care if they're outgoing or quiet.

It doesn't seem fair.

[Anonymous]

-Outgoing guys are typically fun to be around which is a positive.

-They come across as happy and exciting which are more positives.

-If the girl is shy he can kind of draw her out of her shell and make her feel more outgoing or included.

-Outgoing guys project an outward confidence because they aren't sitting back worrying if "this is OK?" "does this sound silly?" they just don't worry about it, they say it and live in the moment.

Dont worry about fairness in the difference between male and female attraction. Do you really think us girls are sitting around comparing what guys like in girls and trying to match up our preferences and saying "Oh well this isn't fair because guys don't care about that quality so we shouldn't either"? No. All is fair in love and war. Guys don't care if a girl is outgoing or quiet because you guys just want her to be attractive. A pretty shy girl > ugly outgoing girl. Either way, that has nothing to do with what we girls care about so I don't care if its fair or not.

[Asker]

So I guess quiet confidence is out of the question.

[Opinion Owner]

No that's not out of the question at all. More mature people respond to quiet confidence, but even then, you as a man still have the unsaid expectation to take the lead and initiate things with a girl. It's cool to have quiet confidence but you still have to break out of that quietness and engage her first otherwise she probably won't notice you

[xRossariox]

Listen, it's not unfair. It may seem like it from your perspective but it isn't. Girls like out going guys because they are easier to talk to when getting to know. Quieter guys, though cute wait on the girls to come to them. That's what pushes some away, because it feels much better when a guy who likes us starts a conversation.

Not saying to through yourself out there like superman coming in for a landing, just try approaching in a reasonable manner. It shows us your taking the time to really get to know us.

[blahblahblah43]

i like quiet guys they have more to them then people realize (:

[EvanNassau]

Hey, good question.

Women are looking for guys who are going to show them a good time, who are going to enhance their life in some way. They also want guys who are going to ask them out, who are confident, etc.

As such, they will go for the outgoing guys. Many women want men to approach them and it's the outgoing guys who are going to do that.

In contrast, most guys just want a girl who is nice. They don't care necessarily if she's outgoing or not. In fact, they might not want her to be too outgoing (i.e. flirting, dancing, talking with other guys). Men are comforted knowing that their girl is theirs and theirs alone and if she is shy then so be it. This is of course based on social conditioning where men have traditionally been out-going, while women remained in the home.

Best

- Evan

Avoiding the “Friend Zone” by Making a Move! -> link

[Asker]

For me I can be outgoing, just not consistently. I'll have spurts where I am and talk a lot, then just choose not to talk as much.

[EvanNassau]

I think that's the way a lot of guys are.

[ArtistBboy]

Tip 1) Women do not "generally" like making the first move

Tip 2) Most women can't figure out if a man likes them; similar to how we can't tell if they like us.

Tip 3) It's a hell of a lot easier to be outgoing and get what you want; than it is to try and get things to change over a population of 6.4billion and climbing.

Tip 4) It's definately not fair, but your a man. You'll get over it.

~ ArtistBBoy

[JohnGPL]

It's not so much that girls go for outgoing guys. It's more like outgoing guys tend to go for girls more often. Most women are waiting for a guy to approach them, not looking for a guy they can approach.

[Estro-Winner]

100% true.

[Anonymous]

Because a guy who is outgoing is more fun to be with. Basically, when it comes to girls you either have to have personality, money or looks. If you don't have any of those you are screwed.

[brii1299]

Why'd you put Anonymous? I personally don't care about money, but you definitely want personality. I mean who wants ,basically, a vegetable?

[cutekid]

Simply nt all girls luk 4 outgoing guys and probably there are guys who care if they are outgoing or quiet...

[foolycooly1001]

outgoing men ask women out. naturally more of them are dating women

[gtex1991]

because they need someone to get them out of their routine boring lives

[Anonymous]

because we like it when the guy is easy to talk to and makes the first move. ;)

[socalgamehater2006]

because girls have higher standards