Guys: Why would you ignore a girl's message?

[Anonymous]

I added a guy on Facebook 4 days ago (he's a friend of an old friend of mine. Different school, but not far from mine. We've never met btw) and messaged (inbox-ed) him first the same day cause I thought he was really cute and seemed nice. We started having a good conversation (asking & answering each other questions) and he even said "you look really pretty by the way just putting that out there :)" all of a sudden. After that he was talking about his future plans, and asked about mine. I replied (it was almost twice as long as his previous reply) but didn't ask him any question in that particular message. He has been online but hasn't replied and it's been 3 days...?

[StringofFate]

Guys respond better to questions than statements. If it's still possible, ask him what he thought about your message, there. We're also not as good communicators as women are and it's possible he feels shy after that message, or doesn't know how to respond.

To sum it up- ask him how he feels and what he's thinking. If you don't get an answer, your guess is as good as mine.

[Asker]

Since I was the one who added him first, messaged him first, and all that, I just think I'll come off as desperate, like most of the girls who added him and said "hey thanks for the add ;)" on his wall and all he replies is, "you're welcome." I don't wanna come off as like, "hey I like you," cus I don't. I just wanna get to know him better...

[StringofFate]

If you're interested, then you're interested. It won't work if you're interested but you want to show you're uninterested in order to save your image while you learn more about him and decide if he's interested or not.

If you want this relationship to continue, tell him you're a bit disappointed that he didn't respond because you thought there was a connection there.

Due to genetics guys aren't as concerned with that stuff as gals are, but they respond well to honesty and forwardness.

[Asker]

Wouldn't a guy want to get to know the girl better though? I was the one who initiated the conversation in the first place - why won't he? :S

[StringofFate]

We make up our minds pretty quickly compared to you about whether we like someone or not. I like to get to know the girl better, but I've usually already decided what I think of her before I know much, and anything else I hear afterward just reaffirms what I decided. Maybe that's just me, but.

Idk what your guy is thinking, may be shy, or not be thinking much. I've met some good girls and then just forgotten about it, though that doesn't seem to be this case.

He'll be the best one to answer

[muthaka]

Us girls should just forget about boys they are useless, they don't deserve us girls.

[VeritablePlethora]

Don't obsess. It's Facebook. Either he doesn't have a reply or he is thinking of a good way to respond. Either way, just leave it be. Too many messages in a row without a reply looks really bad and is a major warning flag

[Asker]

Yea, it's true. I definitely wouldn't send him another message. Just wondering if he will ever reply :s

[VeritablePlethora]

I think there is a good chance he will. He did tell you he thought you were pretty so he probably has some interest. Let it marinate for a few more days before talking to him via Facebook again... unless he messages back of course

[Asker]

Hate how some guys are so confusing sometimes. Our messages were only about an hour apart and suddenly bam, no reply even though he has been online so many times - he could comment on his friend's status, updated his, etc. but he couldn't be bothered to reply my message. It was only 8 lines long after all :/

[VeritablePlethora]

It happens. All you can do is either be patient or look crazy lol

[Asker]

I can be patient, but I was just wondering... What if he never replies? I just wanna know, from the details I've given, if he really is interested and just delaying the reply, or should I just not bother with this guy and not expect a reply because he will never respond to my message? I just don't wanna waste my time waiting for something that will never happen.

[VeritablePlethora]

Well first of all keep in mind you only friended him four days ago. never can tell from that little amount of time. Also, if you do really want to talk to him, give it a few more days, and start a completely different conversation topic without alluding to the earlier topic at all. It will show that you are interested in him but not upset that he didn't respond earlier (even if you actually are... it doesn't matter). Keep your neuroticisms to yourself until you know him better.

[TheGoodTheBadTheHOT]

Just going to say, Facebook chat is sh*t. I wouldn't be surprised if he's just missed the message.

[Asker]

It's not Facebook chat though :/

[TheGoodTheBadTheHOT]

Facebook messages and Facebook chat now operate on the same engine, just with a different skin.

You could always try messaging him again.

[Asker]

Well, yea but he uses Facebook mobile all the time though, which explains why he never goes on Facebook chat. It doesn't work on Facebook mobile.

I just don't get it. He seems so interested in getting to know me, and suddenly he completely ignores me after my quite-lengthy-message about my future plans and the fact that I didn't ask him any question only once.

[StringofFate]

haha, that's possible. I don't know much about Facebook to be honest, never liked it.