I'm married but In love with someone else

[Anonymous]

So I am married and In love with someone else. I have not been in love with my husband for over a year. He knows that but we stay together because of the kids and we get along just fine. He is my bestfriend but emotionally it's just not there between us I love him but I am not in love with him. So we are in a swingers relationship and I found someone else he is fantastic. We have only been talking for about a month but the connection we have is very strong and like no other. I honestly was just in a swingers relationship to find someone for both of us to have fun with and spend some extra time with. I am quite in tuned with my feelings and I am more then capable of weeding out the feelings- love vs lust.

What are your thoughts?

[jaycee777]

Personally, every marriage/relationship loses its passion, you have kids and a husband willing to be with you, I think you need to recognise that you are in it to work on it, maybe you need some councelling. There are many men who walk away from women over and over again, if your husband loves you, I think you should cut all ties with this other guy and be working extra hard to save your marriage. The other guys is a new thing of course it feels better, and maybe you do love him, but you are married with kids. think about how lucky you really are.

[LishaJones]

Its time for a divorce! Whether you have kids or not the situation isn't a good one. For you, your husband, or your kids. Especially if this continues and the kids get old enough to realize what's going on. Not to mention if your not in love with your husband, but your best friends then raising the kids together through and after the divorce will be great! Its not right to stay married if your in love with other man. How is that fair to your husband?

Talk with your husband explain your feelings and suggest a divorce or seperate.

[Shlei3]

My thoughts exactly. Kids will pick up on this and it will affect how they view relationships as they get older.

[depressed-shawti]

well, you should never stay married just for the kids.

be with the one you love but it if you get divorced you need to tell your kids that it isn't there fault because they will think that it is there fault.

also DONT CHEAT.

YOUR MARRIED AND IF YOU CHEAT IT'S AGAINST THE BIBLE.

[Asker]

There are a lot of things against the BIBLE that people don't follow.. and I am not cheating on my husband we are in a open marriage. and have been for some time now.

[depressed-shawti]

Ok kudos to you. but you know what don't call it cheating then, but when it all comes down to it,

the real question is would you like to be with a man you aren't in love with and be married to them or would you liek to be married and with a man you do love?

i would choose love over no love. and hey your kids could think of it as they get two christmas.

but its your chose do what makes you happy.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to do some more talking to the guy you love to make sure he feels the same and then talk to your husband to make surethings are going to beok if do decide to get diviorced and remarried. My advise is don't move too fast have fun and date.

[turkishgirl67]

Been there. I was married for years and fell out of love. I only stayed in the marriage for the "benefit of the children." I even had a 4 year affair. It was miserable, they heard us fighting all the time. I realized that it would be healthier for me and my children to end it. I did. Anyone can tell you that what you are doing is wrong or right. Just think down and deep about what would be best for you and what would make you happy cause we all deserve happiness.

[wally]

worked out for th sake of you'r kids and try not to cheat anymore on you'r husband .

[Asker]

I am not cheating on my husband we are in an open relatonship.. have been for some time now.. he knows about it.. I am not having an affrair

[l-hedoniste]

Seems like you're fine. Keep the lines of communication open, and carry on.