If I told my crush that I just had one date with a guy that looks like him, would that make him jealous, or would it compromise my value to him?

[Bethany22]

There are several variables to consider:

• I would specifically express how excited I was about how that guy looks like him, because I like physical characteristics like his/theirs
  • Would my crush feel the need to distance himself from me, now knowing that I find him attractive, especially when this other guy isn't officially my boyfriend yet?
• My crush may not see the point of being jealous of this guy yet, since we only went out on one date so far?

[RavVid]

Look it is game playing and making guys jealous is an old idea and not a good one. You might equally put him off as you are conveying interests in another guy.

I take it you want him to ask you out with a view to forming a romantic relationship. Doubtless some will tell you to ask him out but that can be equally problematic.

What do you know about him? Is he single? Does he seem to be attracted to you? Is he a work colleague? What are his interests?

Guys get to propose and ask girls out as we are the gatekeepers here.

Girls have asked me out by making it positively ungentlemanly of me to not ask them out to see Movie X they so want to see. I think it is the better way cause they left it with me to do the asking whilst making it obvious if I did ask they would say yes.

If he is a work colleague and you ask him out his immediate response might be against a workplace romance

[AviatorTom]

Do you go out of the way to make your crush not like you? Why would you tell him that?

It's fine to tell him you like his looks, but please don't compare him with other guys. Save that discussion for your close girl friends.

[AviatorTom]

Thanks for MHO

[OlderAndWiser]

Why don't you invite your crush to lunch and tell him that you want to get a male opinion on something. At lunch, you start telling him about this guy you met, you describe him, you tell him that you don't know if the guy is interested in you, and ask him what you could do to find out if the guy likes you without embarrassing yourself. Then, if he says, "Just tell the guy 'cause he'll probably be happy to hear about it," you reply, "Okay. It's you."

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Why do you want to make him jealous?

If he knows your worth, he must be realizing competition is pretty big.

[OfMiceandMen]

Guess it depends on the guy as to whether he's the jealous type. To me it would come of as a little desperate.

Why spend so much time trying to make him see you when you can just be seen. Some guys aren't that quick when it comes to realizing what they have in front of them is their best option. Appeal to his nature by being outgoing, especially in things you know he likes. Take some photos of you doing things you like and you know he will find attractive. You can show him as part of some chit-chat back and forth about what you did on the weekend.

If you show him you are an interesting person then he'll start noticing you more.

[IslaTheWitch]

Why do you want to say it to your crush?

Wouldn't it be better just to tell your crush how you like him?

Answering your question is hard because we don't know your crush. But there could be scenarios you don't take into consideration.

Your crush can distance himself because he can understand your message like - "I have a boyfriend", not important that you express physical similarity.

[RealMarek]

Signaling your interest in another man and that you are dating someone else would be far more apt to put him off than get him to ask you for a date. If you like this guy and want him to date you just be friendly, smile a lot, signal interest. Maybe even ask him to go out with you. Show interest and if he’s interested in you he will reciprocate. If not, you need to move on.

[johnnymoooore]

Hun, maybe it would prove useful to stay in for a few nights instead of eagerly searching out Mr. Right, and spend time figuring out what you want the type of man you hope to find for a partner, pertaining to his character/values, and lifestyle.

You may have an easier time finding what you're looking for if you know what it looks like.

And in light of how you handled that comment you made to him taking to him like he was one of your girlfriends... I would think he's a idiot with little self-worth, or simply not seeking a meaningful relationship if he were to continue pursuing you.

Not that any guy seeking a relationship with you is by default therefore an idiot... lol

just in his circumstance as to all that was conveyed through your comment, about his standing in your world, and your readiness for a meaningful relationship.

[NathanDavis]

that's just a terrible idea... lol

could bring 99 bad consequences... and the possible one way in which this could be fine, won't be any good either

[AimeeKyle]

It would likely devalue whatever thought he has of your relationship (assuming he has a similar thought / crush as you).

It would be better to be honest, direct/straight forward. Life is too short. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

[JesseP1nk]

You try to get him jealous and want to know if he feels hurt? Next you go stab him and ask if he feels hurt while he bleeding to death? You are sick!

So those guys are social experiments for you. So if a guy treat you like a lab rat how would you feel? You are shitty person, honestly

[Holsen]

Actually that’s too tricky, it’s like the case when a girls says “I would love a guy like you” but you are a “the guy like you”, so in this case he would feel bad and not conplimented in my opinion!

[Anonymous]

First rule, when you're interested in a guy.. Dont talk about the men you have dated, or your ex's. Massive red flag. Its best you dont tell him about it if you actually are interested.

[IslaTheWitch]

I don't agree. Why should we keep our past hidden? It is not about if. Just how and when.

I would first tell my crush about my feelings and check if he is interested at all. And then I would know if it even makes any sense to say anything else.

[Opinion Owner]

You may disagree, but from a male point of view it's more like "she's either trying to make me jealous, or she's trying to flex and show I have competition"

For example how would you feel if the man you're interested in started talking about all the women he has been with, or is still interested in.

Both situations are massive turn off. And it's not just me, most good men see it as something that would make us drop interest.

[IslaTheWitch]

I think it's your point of view, as you don't own other men opinions :)

I asked about my partners' previous girlfriends. I don't find it strange. It's good to know.

[Opinion Owner]

I may not own their opinions, but the stats back me.

[IslaTheWitch]

Share stats, please

[Blueeyes81]

@IslaTheWitch I agree with him. It's fine once a relationship has been established or you are dating but to do that with a crush would instantly make me lose interest.

[IslaTheWitch]

This exactly what I wrote in my comment. It's not about if to talk about it. It's about when and how.

[Opinion Owner]

And yet she specifically indicates this is her crush, as in a man she's not in a relationship with. If she wants a relationship with him, mentioning stuff like that to him is an easy way for him to lose all interest. It's a weird flex, one that is very manipulative.

[IslaTheWitch]

Read my opinion. It's precisely what I wrote.

[ProbablyClueless]

Are you trying to make sure that your crush doesn't want anything to do with you? lol Why would you ever tell the guy about other guys that have your attention, if you want him to make a move on you?

[Blink655555]

I get what you’re trying to do but it won’t work:

a) if you harp on how alike they look he may get a little weirded out

b) just the idea of you being into/with someone else may put him off from pursuing you.

You could just casually mention how you try to look for his physical attributes in guys. So e. g. he has black hair you could be like I love guys with dark hair.

[Andres77]

If you have a crush, why didn’t you go on a date with him?
If I was someone’s crush and they told me that I would feel like they were trying to make me jealous and it would piss me off and I wouldn’t have anything to do with them.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

That could do a little of both with him.

[JacobJordan]

if your goal is to make sure her never wants to be in a relationship with you tell him. if on the other hand you want a relationship with him try asking him out. tends to work better

[BourbonAndBacon]

You'd be playing a dangerous game. I wouldn't date someone who is dating someone else. I'd just move on. Especially dating someone who looked like me. That's a bit creepy

[spartan55]

We, you make some really poor decisions sometimes. Was he put off?

[Mike87479]

If he was interested in you I think it would make him jealous

[love_conquers_lust]

I think you should examine why you're not dating your crush instead.

[love_conquers_lust]

@Bethany22 worldscolide blocked me and likely removed my comment in reply to his:
“This is shit advice as it reads.”

[Anonymous]

Why do you look like the girl from Better Call Saul?

[Blueeyes81]

Play stupid games win stupid prizes. He's just going to think you are strange.

[Sparkie460]

Why would you tell him anything about your dating life.

[TallAnon]

Jealousy is not a good thing. I wouldn't mention it to him.

[007kingifrit]

you need to directly say you like him not play games

[Mansearching]

He might not think much of it at all... tbh