Guys, Would you be discouraged if you saw many men flirting and approaching your crush and checking her out?

[Anonymous]

Considering you have never talked to her and she doesn’t respond positively to the Advances of others.

Yeah kinda

No not really

[Anonymous]

If you don't respond positively to your crush and give him signs of interest, he will avoid advancing because you haven't gestured your consent for him to do so. I would be discouraged too if my crush has the attention of other men, but doesn't acknowledge me in a way she hasn't to them.

Simple things like touching your hair, shaking a foot, looking at him, letting your hair down around him; this gestures that you are available for him.

I get crushed on by shy women; they look great, and some even dress up, but because they don't initiate conversations and expect to just me approached - I'm not going to without clear signs of availability: Like, yesterday there was this really nicely dressed woman who followed me in town and kept trying to stand where I was passing whilst looking me in the eyes - slim sandstone pants, and red[?] blazer[?] - but because she said nothing I just smiled and walked past every time (I definitely should have asked her if she wanted a coffee, but I'm oblivious to subtlety, and guys are under immense pressure not to approach nowadays). You need to communicate your consent to him.

[Asker]

I only acknowledge them differently because these men talk to me while he only glances at me though

[Opinion Owner]

That there is why he was discouraged. You invested more of your attention in them than him. It doesn't matter who starts the conversation. If you talk to them and not him that shows you are more available to other guys than him.

If you have a crush on HIM you need to correct this through gesturing specifically at him and only him; such as touching your hair, crossing legs, letting down hair, saying Hi [etc; something you only do in his presence]. Otherwise he will feel like you view other men above him, and this will make him withdraw.

[Yannae]

That depends. I don't look at the men approaching her. I look at her and at how she handles the situation, how she receives the flirting. If she loves the attention, that crushing will go away really quick. But if she doesn't care about it and keeps everybody at arm's length, I'll be more motivated to approach her.

[Asker]

Hmm ok. My crush used to always glance at me but after he saw a guy flirting with me he completely stopped looking my way. I remained polite but I didn’t flirt back

[DannyUk2017]

Ofcourse, that prooves i'm not your league so is no point in approaching you, and then to get an "aproval" that i made a mistake, that would be like a Full confirmation that approaching you was a big mistake, which will make me to shut down even more than before.

[XXTruthfulOgrexx]

Absolutely, If she is farming that much attention, then it will be highly likely she will seek out that attention if we are in a relationship. This would make it highly possible she has no idea how to pair bond. Not worth the chance.

[Asker]

But I don’t seek out attention, people just come up and talk to me and I don’t even flirt back, I remain as short as possible without being impolite

[XXTruthfulOgrexx]

Sorry wouldn't change my mind. You are doing something that is giving these guys the idea you want to be approached. Guys, especially given today's social climate have stopped approaching most women unless there is some behavior, look, or way your carrying yourself that is giving them the idea you want to be approached. Again I wouldn't even take the chance.

[Tiger288]

No really have crush on them it means nothing to me cuz crush can go fade really quickly

[strateguy632]

1st,.