What have I been missing?

[Simslover92]

For the past few days I have been seeing really attractive men in my workplace.

After years of being isolated from the real world, I'm finally seeing attractive people again. And it's like why did I ever think about going on dating apps when there are plenty of options in the real world.

I just have to stop being so awkward and become approachable.

Oh I also have been getting several compliments about my outfits and face. Which I found kind of shocking because I dress like a librarian and my face is meh.

But then this guy today gave me a look and it made me feel so gooey inside. He reminded me of my first. Not my ex-boyfriend but the first guy I slept with.

I wish I could have spoke more to him than what I did but it was in a professional setting so I couldn't plus I'm really shy and awkward.

I think he's a coach so I may have to check out a game lol

[MrOracle]

I'm going to say this with only the best of intentions, that you are able to find a man and be in a relationship.

You mentioned that you dress like a librarian, implying, to some degree, that you expect men only to give attention to women who dress closer to what a stripper might wear. That's because, like most women, you don't understand how men think.

Dressing in a more revealing way WILL get you more attention, yes, but unless you are only looking for casual sex, it will all be the WRONG type of attention. Men love to bang such women (and that's clearly what's on offer), but (most) men don't commit to such women.

(Most) men who are looking for a woman to commit to are looking for more conservative women - women who dress more modestly and are more feminine and family-oriented.

I think you have been giving off those more conservative vibes and you dress more modestly. That's far more attractive to "relationship men" than you seem to realize, and I'm not surprised that you are getting some attention. And it's likely the kind of attention that most women say they want, though clearly some of those women only say that for appearance's sake.

My point is: stop thinking you are doing something wrong when you are really doing it right, despite what your girlfriends and especially TikTok will tell you.

[Veronika_p]

Honestly, I think you’ve been missing real-life exposure more than anything else. Sometimes when you spend years isolated, you forget how different it feels to actually be around people, make eye contact, notice someone’s energy, and realize, “Oh… I’m attracted to people again.” 😅

And the compliments might be telling you something too. Maybe your perception of yourself has been much harsher than the way other people actually see you. You don’t have to suddenly become outgoing or completely change who you are. Being shy doesn’t mean being unapproachable.

As for the coach… 😂 I’d say enjoy the little crush, but don’t build an entire love story around one look. A look can mean attraction, curiosity, or absolutely nothing. If you happen to see him again, just smile, say hello, and let the interaction develop naturally. You don't have to become a different person to be approachable...

[Simslover92]

Thanks and you're so right.

[sage2021]

One of the things that my Patrick said that he liked about me when we first met is that he liked the way that I dress modestly.
Then he added that he can't stand when a woman dresses with her top she's wearing reveals her breasts. He said that it grossed him out when they were at a restaurant and her breasts would be on top of the table. Hehehe 🤭

About dating someone who you work with, well, I made that big mistake!!
You should never get your honey where you get your money. Where you work isn't like an in person dating site.

It probably feels good to get a compliment from a guy, and to be paid some attention to.

I believe that you might be deprived of that kind of attention and it feels good. But because your ex dissed you and made you feel like no matter what you did, you were never good enough to be his girlfriend again.

So, try to keep things in perspective and pump the brakes a little bit at work with the guys.

[Still-alive]

As a trend i think you’re much harder on how you look than you think. ;)

anyway yeah in person is definitely way better than relying on those dating apps where lets face it a lot of not good dating prospects go lol.

go get em girl! 🐅

[Staximus]

Don’t get all twitterpated just because some guy makes googly eyes at you, you’re not a school girl anymore. You have a job to do that doesn’t include fooling around with your coworkers, unless you want to find yourself looking for a new job.

[Iron_Man]

Of course that’s gonna happen every man’s gonna be attractive to you. That’s like a prisoner being in prison for years and then when they get out, their eyes become real big and then they like every girl they see

[Shiprex]

You've been avoiding contact and possible rejection and now you're becoming more receptive to the potential for something happening.

[rgb008]

give him your number the next time you see him

[exitseven]

there are definitely more attractive people around. There was a rash of retirements where I work and lots of new hires, Some are actually pretty good looking.

[NathanDavis]

welcome to the world... lol

[NathanDavis]

I've never tried a dating app before... there's about a million people all around me

[Simslover92]

Lol thanks

[Paige2006]

Wekcome back!

[Simslover92]

Lol thanks!