I'm dating a really shy, inexperienced guy. How to make it work?

[Anonymous]

He's older than me (he's 24 and I'm 19) but whereas I've had quite a few boyfriends and dated a lot already and got all that experience etc. I know that he's never had a girlfriend before and never been intimate or anything with anyone. I've been seeing him for over a month now- he was really honest when I asked him about this. He even apologized for it.

He's a really nice guy- smart, funny, successful- but he's too nervous or shy to even hold my hand a lot of the time unless I take his first- I get the feeling he's scared to touch me. I want things to go further but I don't want to scare him off or make him uncomfortable either. I don't think he's been around a girl in any way before.

But he's so different and interesting and sweet. Hoe can I develop things between us?

[wbwass]

Honestly it sounds just like me when I went out with my first girlfriend. If you want to go further I'd recomend one of these two options: 1) Talk to him about it and let him know that you wanna go further in the relationship and physical aspect and ask him if he is scared of doing the wrong thing to get you to think differently about him(because that would explain why he doesn't wanna hold your hand because he's nervous of how you will react or feel about him if you do)... or 2) Be agressive with him physically and possibly mentally and prove to him and show him that your ready to take the relationship to the next level(this is what my ex did and it worked for me) But ether way prove/show/tell him that you really love him(or like him depending on how much he matters to you and your view on love) and that your ready to go to the next level/ stage of the relationship :-)

[kurozogo]

Well I guess that he may be kind of scared of offending you or something , I think that either initialising it or just letting him know that you want to go forth will be alright .. He is not a girl , he should want to have you , but may feel that his lack of experience may make him turn you off or something .

[blossom7409]

be patient and be the gentle leader. I think with so much media available he surely knows something about dating and courting a woman. My guess is he told you all this so you be tolerant and patient because this is new to him. The other thing might be to tell him what you want or need as you better get to know one another since he may not pick up on things and will need some help. sounds like a cool guy have fun!

[defytraditiongirl]

you should take the lead in the beginning mostly to let him know how comfortable he is, teach him

[moviedude714]

i can definetley relate to him, I'm guessing he is scared to touch you because some girls out there accuse guys of assault or attempted rape

[Anonymous]

The guy you described is 95 % me ... I have been told that by lots of girls .

[ihatetakingcharge]

i'm surprissed you gave him a chance