How to know when a girl wants you to approach them?

Question

How to know when a girl wants you to approach them?

Yoda

Ladies, what are the subtle hints that us guys might be missing?

Often times, we pick up the wrong cues, and choose the skank over the cute shy girl in the corner that doesn't have it in her to approach us first.

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Most Helpful Girls

notluckywithlove
Xper 4

+1 y

Well a few signs that the shy girl wants you to approach her could be

1) She glances up at you, and looks away quickly when you catch her looking.

2) Kinda in the same as one but you notice that she keeps glancing your way.

3) She smiles at you

The thing is most shy girls don't mind being approached as long as you don't come up to us yelling and screaming...a nice smile and a hello is always a good way to start. Now one of the main mistakes that people make when talking to a shy girl is that her lack of conversation means that she's not interested..not true at all. When talking to someone they don't really know or even sometimes people they know well shy girls find it hard to hold a conversation...much in the way it's hard to hold eye contact. If she's smiling glancing up at you and she seems content with the conversation going chances are she's interested..were not that hard to figure out were just a lot quieter =P

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- DocClassic
  
  +1 y
  no one wants to be with someone who can't hold a conversation...
- notluckywithlove
  
  +1 y
  Hmm no disrespect to you at all but unless you interveiw everyone in the world you can't really say that...there's lots of patient people who don't mind waiting until the person is comfortable enough that they can..just saying though =)
- Blankname1
  
  +1 y
  When noting comes to mind I normally ask questions about them or interesting questions in till the conversation seems to be flowing without me saying much.
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- candlewax
  
  +1 y
  If by "no one" you mean you, then yes, you would be correct. :p
- DishLady
  
  +1 y
  Love this answer. It's right on!
ananyme
Xper 2

+1 y

i'm sorry but I'm not sure that kind of signs exist, honestly.

PLus, any sort of signs that some girl coulmd give you could be misinterpreted and mislead you, if you feel like approaching a girl don't wait for some signs ! just go for it :)

most of us don't consider ouselves like extremely attractive so whenever someones find the courage to go talk to us we are flattered unless you're a totally creep, thus are friendly towards you (not necesarily flirty though).

seriously if agirl is really shy and discrete there's little chances she gives you hints, and what's the worth thingthat could happen ? rejection ? you can get over it and as I've said she'll probably just be nice to you anyway.

good luck

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- DocClassic
  
  +1 y
  rejection is a pretty big deal. what's the number one reason girls don't approach guys? they are afraid...same with guys actually
- AdamThomas
  
  +1 y
  It's not a big deal when you go through it a few times. I agree that guys should just approach anyway without looking for signals. Shy girls won't give any signals at all, they'll be afraid of even doing that. And anyway, who cares if girls are afraid? We're the ones with the balls, don't be a girly-man and use that as an excuse :p
- ananyme
  
  +1 y
  life is about taking risks. seriously even if rejection was that big of a deal what's your plan then ? just sit there and wait for some mysterious sign that would erradicate every single doubt in your mind ? its not only about dating, you cannot not do something only cause you're afraid.
  
  and come on how rejection can be that awful ? OK there's 1 minute of total awkwardness, lets say even a couple of days if she's a close friend, but nothing more

Most Helpful Guys

Rashad | 102 opinions shared on Flirting topic.
Xper 7

+1 y

If you're a guy that has the confidence to approach a girl you shouldn't really look for any types of signs. You just do it, the most you can expect is an eye contact which could also be misleading at times.

We are talking about ordinary girls most of them are really shy, they might be interested in you but not have the courage to stare at a random guy in hopes that he might approach her. The best thing really is knowing the instinct actions girls tend to do naturally such as touching their hairs etc.. But again looking for signs is ridiculous in my opinion.

I could tell you a short story...

When I was young maybe 16 or 17 I went on my first date with a girl that I didn't know a thing about except her name, age, and in which city she live in. We had a great time, enjoyed ourselves very well. While we were on a date that lasted 6 or 7 hours, the whole time I was looking for signs from her to kiss her. I read few articles online that explained the signs from girls when they want to be kissed the signs included direct eye contact (that lasted 20-30 seconds) or when a girl bites her lip etc.. All of those signs were BS because I never got them from her so I didn't end up kissing her even though I liked her a lot.

After the date I talked to her, she was pretty straight forward and asked me 'did you not enjoy the date? I told her I did then she asked why didn't I attempt to kiss her? That I couldn't answer...

Basically humans are not all the same and there is no signs. You have to go by your own insticts.

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moviedude714 | 1.9K opinions shared on Flirting topic.
Master

+1 y

eye contact, smile, but girls do not make this obvious

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What Girls & Guys Said

70

pr3ttybr0wn
Influencer

+1 y

If we make eye contact, smile at you and keeps looking at you then that's your green light

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- Prof_Don
  
  +1 y
  Simply sweet answer here. Nothing to add to this. Thumb-up #6 for you. :)
upood | 410 opinions shared on Flirting topic.
Yoda

+1 y

She'll put herself in your line of view. May be by walking by you a lot to go get something or just standing in a distance but in front of you/in your sight. She may not look at you but will be near you or in your line of view. Glances, quick ones, usually mean she's shy. Notice if she fidgets with her hair or clothes or her nose... if she touches her nose she may very well be nervous and like you. But the best way to tell is if you smile at her, when she's passing by... if she's shy she may need encouragement to show you she likes you.

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- curiouschica
  
  +1 y
  Yes, agree about the smiling maneuver!
candlewax | 76 opinions shared on Flirting topic.
Explorer

+1 y

Not choosing the skank over the shy girl? Avoid the hobag in the middle of the bar, screaming while taking shots and making an ass out of herself? Or maybe avoid the chick who falls over herself to flirt with any penis she sees? ;) Sorry, this may not be you, but I've seen too many guys who go for this girl and then whine about what a ho she is.

Like what has been mentioned before, eye contact is a huge indicator. I think too many people think "OMG STALKER," anymore, but it's a pretty big indicator as far as body language goes. Approaching and making casual small talk isn't too bad either. Too many guys try that stupid pick up line bs and it kind of gives off the impression of you wanting one thing only. To a shy person, that can be really off putting.

Generally, go for the girl who isn't out there making an ass out of herself.

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phil2
Guru

+1 y

you might want to try to ask her best friend if she likes you.

she might drop off a letter giving you her phone number.

she will look at you a lot.

I know because I was the cute shy girl and that's what I did but nothing happened and all the hot guys I liked didn't talk to me or ask me out :(

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jazzie
Xper 4

+1 y

Girls may make eye contact, but may not want you to knw that she is looking an checkin you out.. So tht could be a sign..

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christinasmiles
Xper 4

+1 y

She looks at you a couple times. Smiles at you while looking at you.

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Anonymous

+1 y

BA, "notluckywithlove"!

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JanJan | 64 opinions shared on Flirting topic. Xper 7 · Accepted Answer

I feel like this comment was made for me. I've been on both sides of the coin here. I was VERY shy for most of my life, and I'm just starting to come out of my shell. But I remember what it's like wishing that the hot guy across the room would walk over. And now you can be that guy for someone!

When approaching shy women, it helps to be friendly. Don't try and be a stud. Just be casual and strike up a conversation, and if it goes well you can always show interest after a bit. A compliment is always a nice touch, but try not to make it sexual. Comment on her jacket, or her bracelet, etc. Women who don't try to be bombshells want to be appreciated for their personalities, so that's what you make her feel good about. "That's a cool coat" is much more appealing than "Wow, you're beautiful" when you first meet someone, because it implies that you like her TASTE, not just her BODY. Talk about whatever comes to mind, something nearby, or ask her about her week, whatever. Then introduce yourself. "Oh, by the way, I'm so and so." If you segway into the conversation this way, it's a little more subtle than "Hey, I'm so and so. Can I buy you a drink?" If you decide then that you want to make a move on her, do it after you've been talking for at least a few minutes. "Hey, would you like a refil?" Etc. A shy girl might not give you any clues from across the room, but she'll be more receptive if you make the first move. If she is giving you clues, the other comments have given you some good ideas. Good luck!

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