Does he just want me for sex?

[Anonymous]

So I recently started talking to a guy from my middle school class (I'm in college now) and we had a good time talking so we hung out. Then after that he asked me to go on a date. I said yes thinking, okay, kinda weird and out of the blue but maybe it'll be good. So on this date we saw a movie, and held hands during it, then afterward we ended up making out in my car. We hung out again today and we got to making out with his shirt off, and just my tank off. He asked if I wanted to go further. I said not yet.

my question is, does he only want sex.

Here's some extra info if you feel you need it to answer:

I asked him why he asked me out and his response was that "you're hot, and easy to talk to". When we are doing things he's pretty respectable and asks if I'm okay, but he didn't really warm up with touch my butt or top half for very long (he was there for like a minute), then he just went straight for feeling my va. But he doesn't push it too much which is good. I"m usually good at picking up if they just want it, or they want a relationship, but I can't tell. He took me to a party had a good time with his friends and he didn't ignore me like most guys would. He waits until the next day to text after we hang out, which I guess is dating etiquette. I just feel like we starting making out and taking our clothes off pretty fast. Specially since it's only our 3rd time hanging out since we have seen each other since middle school. I'm only home for the summer so I don't really see if he want's to date or just have a fling or what.

Updates

+1 y

So this just in, He's gonna be moving this weekend to a place closer to college but he's also gonna be around some of the time where I live. he's a hour and a half to two hours away then, so he's carving the way for "fun" when he's in town?

[MooneyBravo]

You know what a man does if he wants to have sex but he doesn't want a commitment or take the time to get to know someone first? He hires a prostitute. Unless of course he's good enough to pick someone up that will believe his lies.

I'm going to be blunt here ok? Let me be clear about this. I'm not trying to disrespect you in anyway, ok?

When women give up their bodies to men for sex outside a committed relationship which used to be defined as marriage between a man and a woman, they have done nothing more than provided a service to them.

Dr Laura labels them as being unpaid whores. If a man really does love you, why don't you make him prove it by refraining from sex until marriage?

Word from the wise: People that are worth having in your life will stand the test of time.

And let's not confuse love with lust. All that kissy making out stuff is not love at all. Sooner or later, we all come down from the clouds and the reality has set in that this a very real person who is far from perfect. Love is getting ready to take us to the next plateau but most people don't stick around to learn what real love is all about. Instead, we are off on another wild goose chase looking for another victim believing that somehow it will be different this time.

Wake up and look around you. The world is filled with broken families that started off right where you are at. It all started with irresponsible sex, sooner or later someone gets pregnant, out comes baby, bye bye boyfriend and now you no longer matter.

You've been taken advantage of.

Dump him, learn from your mistake and read this FREE E-Book

The Laws Of Dating By Mike Tucker

scribd.com/doc/19065669/Laws-of-Dating-by-Mike-Tucker

Start establishing sexual boundaries in your life and stand by them. If a guy violates them, dump him! If he violates them now, he will violate other boundaries later. Dating is about learning what the other person is made of, not whether they're good in bed.

Peace Sister

[Asker]

uh, well I'm not mad at what you said because you have an opinion but I don't throw sex around like you imply. All we've done is made out and I honestly don't want to have sex with him right now. I'm not comfortable enough for that. I'm trying to figure out if this guy is worth keeping around based on the signals he's sending. If all he's into is sex I don't want him around. I haven't been taking advantage of because I haven't crossed a point of no return here. I'm trying to avoid that.

[MooneyBravo]

You see my dearest, what I'm trying tell you is that if you want to make an honest assesment of his goals, you need to be willing to put him to the test of time. I know that your thinking that it's OK to have sex out of marriage because everyone is doing it but statistics are painting a different picture. I just don't want you to have to learn the hard way like some of us older people have. Poor marriages are a result of poor dating.

Please make the right choice Ok?

[Asker]

i will respect you're comment, but I feel like times are changing, and if you're smart about it you can have a life long marriage even if you have sex before marriage.

[kriskiss]

IDk he seems to be pretty normal and honest dude. he says he asked you out because you are hot and easy to talk to which is true. I mean why does anyone want to go out and be physical with someone? because they think they are attractive and like them.

he may want a relationship. maybe not. just communicate and c where it goes. if it only ends up to be a summer romance then let it be a great summer romance to remember.

and him wanting to feel your va. is not abnormal...girls often go for a guys crotch too.

[Asker]

do you think there is a way that I could get him to relax and slow things down a bit. I know I could always talk to him, but I think it would be better to hint first. He seems to pick up on how act fairly quickly. after we made out he asked me what I was thinking. I knew this was an opening to talk about this, but didn't want to push the situation into something labeled just yet because if we talked it might be labeled to FWB, or boyfriend which I don't want quite yet.

[kriskiss]

it seems like the only thing to do is keep hooking up making out etc and just tell him you don't wanna have sex or are not ready guys often are not either they just think they are. its often a little uneasy sleeping with someone for the first time. but it seems like you do not know what you want for sure which is normal just keep hooking up minus sex or oral I guess. and until you feel he's falling for you then maybe sleep with him.

[Asker]

thank you! this helped a lot, you're right that I really don't know what I want, which I guess is why I'm kinda over analyzing everything he does to figure out what he wants so I have something to go on. I'm just gonna take a chill pill, and relax. ahah. You said to just keep hooking up, but if I don't know what I want isn't that sorta like leading him on?

[kriskiss]

Ok ya I guess it is so don't hook up with him.

[Anonymous]

Dating etiquette? He waited until the next day to text but thought he could stick his hands in your pants? Honey, he doesn't know etiquette - he's might like you but he's thinking with his d***.

[Asker]

i'm sorry I should have been more clear, by touching my va. he did it over the pants. like over my shorts shorts.

[Horizon]

Here's an easy way to establish that: ask yourself why would he be attracted to you? What does he know about you that would make him want to know you as a person, and what did he express interest in or was impressed by when you mentioned it. If you have trouble with coming up with anything - it's probably just sex. If not, you're good.

[kheserthorpe]

He probably doesn't know. He's not doing things to put FWB type boundaries in place. He seems to be just drifting forward seeing where things go.

[Anonymous]

Not good signs going on. He's jumping into things really fast. If he's trying to make you his girl then that's probably not to best way to go about it.

[Raiden]

Easy? Its about sex and you want it too.

[Raiden]

My first comment.