Do you find competitiveness to be attractive?

Question

i don't like competitive people cause it seems like they're not happy if they're not the best.

competitiveness seems to come out of insecurity from where I see it.

and I hate when I catch myself being too competitive.

but I do have fun with my friends when we compete with each other for fun.

and I would like a girl that wants to kick my ass at COD, that would be hot.

GoodManDave · Accepted Answer

Depends how competitive and on what they're competitive about.

Like, in Euchre one of my friends gets NASTY about it. One time he really berated a friend for putting down a card and would not shut up about the "stupid" move he made (And yet in that same game, we won every single hand). It's really not fun playing him because he's really disrespectful. He goes WAY beyond kidding around or trash talking (for fun). It's a card game. Come on, people. This wasn't a televised match, a large amount of people weren't watching, you aren't being sponsored or paid like in professional Poker, just... keep your priorities. It was a group of friends.

If a girlfriend or wife was just play acting at trash talking, and it was clearly done as a joke, then that's fine. Crying because you lost (when you're over 30, aren't playing professionally, and have not really lost anything of importance) or not speaking to someone because they lost a game is ridiculous, and yes, I know people who do this.

I know a couple of forty somethings that scream profanities and will rip anyone apart who doesn't play volleyball as competitively as they do, and this is at church sponsored games. "Oh, ::chuckle::... I'm just so competitive!" Grow up, you know? They may not say anything, but I've known new people who don't want anything to do with church because of them.

I've seen little fake "boxing matches" turn into huge serious brawls because someone got too competitive and got knocked someone else into a chair or something. One time a dude took a chair to my back because I was (CLEARLY) play fighting with a friend and another so called friend thought it'd be funny to smack me across the back with a chair.

That kind of competitiveness is, of course, unattractive. However, when it inspires you to work at something, and train, that can be good. Playful competitiveness, or when it inspires you to be a better brand or a better person, hey, that's great. Getting good grades, wanting to be the top of your class, all good. When you feel it ruins your life because you're Salutatorian and not valedictorian, then it's too far.

TheGodEmperorLeto · Accepted Answer

Depends, In general I don't really, but a little bit at some points can be fun.

Cool-Relax · Accepted Answer

I'm competitive, and you're right, it stems from insecurity on my part. Although, in most cases I strive to outdo myself, not someone else. My boyfriend isn't competitive at all though, except when it comes to COD and Battlefield. Unfortunately, I'm better at watching him play lol. I wouldn't mind him being just a little more competitive, but I don't think we would work together if he were very competitive.

ManaX · Accepted Answer

Competitiveness within reason to me can be attractive, shows he would fight for something. But if he takes losses to personally (e.g. crying/anger/grudge) then I'd be thinking he's getting to emotionally involved. That's when it becomes unattractive. e.g. can't understand men's obsession with (British) football. Would prefer it if the guy didn't like it/had no interest.

Catie101 · Accepted Answer

being a bit competitive is good and fun because who wants to play games where no one even cares to win?, but some people are overtly competitive and I find it just to be stressful, unattractive and unnecessary.

WhiteSky · Answer

Competitiveness is attractive. However, if it gets to the point where it is all that matter to them, then it is certainly a turn-off.

In addition, they must not be sore losers! :( Good sportsmanship goes a long way!

Morningglory3 · Answer

It's more attractive when a person can take a little losing with a smile but tries harder the next round. I agree with everyone else that only good natured competition is fun. I don't want any holes in the wall.

MeridiansAAngel · Answer

being too competitive is unattractive. a little bit makes it fun and happy and keeps you joking around but if its like they really need to win, then its a problem. -A

calialltheway1993 · Answer

Only if he's competing for my affection, I find it to be attractive because he wants to win me over. I'd be more than happy to kick your ass at COD.

LonelyandInTheDark · Answer

Competitiveness is attractive in certain situations, like in the work arena and dating scene...

I think it pushes people to be on their best behavior and full potential and that's certainly a good thing.

Sorry for the trite answer, I feel lazy :p

Kearra · Answer

I like drive and motivation that's attractive ...there is a difference with that and true competitiveness

Anonymous · Answer

i don't think competitiveness directly comes out of insecurity

to me, competitiveness has more to do with drive & ambition...its not necessarily to be "the best" but more about pushing yourself towards a goal. drive & ambition is an attractive quality.

however, some people take it to an extreme and honestly desire to be the best and get upset when they're not...that might in fact come out of insecurity.

ForeverYours39 · Answer

I think intense competitiveness would be annoying. A little is tolerable though.

Anonymous5124 · Answer

If a girl isn't competitive, I don't know how it would work out.

Lj236 · Answer

if its a fun competitive then yeah but if they are too serious I don't care for it

Anonymous · Answer

a certian amount can be attractive but it can be easily over done...

Do you find competitiveness to be attractive?

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