40 Things Every Woman Should Know...

[Enchanted_x3]

I found this article online and I tweaked quite a few of the statements. I believe that a lot of these truths can be applied to both girls and guys. I didn't have room to post this all in my profile, so I figured I'd just make it an article.


Love is greater than all of us. So with that said, I hope you find this article to be a good read. :)

1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.

2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.

3. If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man's character, forget him.

4. Always trust your intuition.

5. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship.

6. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

7. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve, then hell no, you can't "be friends." Friends don't mistreat friends.

8. Have faith in God/etc. regarding your relationship, but don't let faith make you stupid.

9. Don't settle.

10. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for when nothing changes.

11. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

12. There's only 1 'reason' a man dumps you; he doesn't want you.

"If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man's character, forget him."

13. Always put yourself and your happiness first.

14. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

15. Like from the show Sex and the City, if he doesn't call, he just isn't that interested.

16. Know when to cut the cord, don't be strung along.

17. Don't fall for the "I'm confused role". Remove yourself from the situation to let him figure things out (but don't wait for him, move on).

18. If you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).

19. Do not make him into a God. He is a man and nothing more, nothing less.



20. Actions always speak louder than words.

21. Never let a man define who you are.

22. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

23. Just because he says he loves you, doesn't mean that he won't hurt you.

24. Know that you deserve to be the number 1 person in the life of the #1 person in your life.

25. Love is a verb.

26. Learn to give up your lifelong task of trying to make someone unavailable-available, someone ungiving-giving, and someone unloving-loving. You'll never succeed.

27. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

28. If you don't love yourself, you can't love anyone else.

29. You cannot mend someone else's broken heart.

"A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you."

30. You need time to heal between relationships. Baggage isn't cute. Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

31. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you. A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. Look for someone complimentary, not supplementary.

32. NEVER give more in a relationship than what you are getting out of it.

33. When actions and words conflict, believe the actions.

34. Don't fall for the "I'm not the loving type". When a man loves you, there is nothing in this world, within reason, that he wouldn't do for you.

35. Make him miss you sometimes. When a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him, he takes it for granted.

36. When it's time to let go; let go.

37. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.

38. Never believe a man that tells you he want to be with you, while he's with someone else.

39. Don't be a man's doormat, make him open the door for you.

40. There is someone out there worthy to be in your life. Don't lose hope.

[Belgie]

A mass of conflicting so-called "rules", which bear little or no relation to reality.

e.g.

"27. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. "

Translation - If a man physically abuses you, it's your fault. You let him do it.

3. If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man's character, forget him.

Translation : Date Jesus. Or Abraham Lincoln.

10. Don't stay because you think "it will get better."

Translation: Relationships require no work. They should be effortless.

etc

[heavenonearth]

These are great :) I can see why some of the guys take issue with some of them, but of course you shouldn't read too much into these. I think strong words and phrases were used to emphasize certain points, like the doormat one. You don't literally make him open the door for you, just make sure he doesn't treat you poorly. Nice list.

[bersaba]

I disagree with:

1 Nothing?

3 Could your doubts be wrong?

4 How many times have peoplejumped to conclusions and been wrong?

8 Atheists?

12 Could be many, external pressures. Moving for work for one.

15 Or he's busy, or lost the number, or you could call.

18 What if the women in his family are different to you? Perhaps his mother beat him?

22 Completely false.

26 People can change, not always, but can

28 Ever met a depressed person? They can be loving to others.

35 Not true

39 Or not?

[Enchanted_x3]

Belgie - Your interpretations aren't very reasonable.

#27- I mean that if you allow yourself to be disrespected it is your fault. You don't have to tolerate any lack of respect on his part. You can walk. You need to be strong enough to know your limits and standards and when the line is crossed, you don't stick around.

#3- Someone's character is pretty apparent after you spend some time with him/her. Is/she generally nice? Cynical? etc...

#10- If there's a deal breaker, you split. Don't prolong.

[Darkfaith]

18. is wrong, my mum and I joke around all the time, we tell each other to f*ck off, and order each other around e.g Me: " MUM! where is my food! make me food!" ... Mum: "Make it yourself you lazy bastard" and then we get into a pretend yelling match and then laugh about it after, my sister is an abusive piece of work who doesn't do anything all day, doesn't work, is fat, shallow and treats me like crap, and my nan is a racist and derogatory lunatic,but it doesn't mean ill mistreat my girlfriend.

[Yeahhbro]

27) This is again sort of selfish, this sort of telling girls to "tame" their boyfriend so he doesn't get put of "undesired" behavior. Obviously don't let yourself get beat up or used by some guy, but it doesn't mean that you have to control him either.

31) Not true either, you should look for both things not just one. However you should look for somebody who helps you better yourself on the things that you do bad, that is how the best relationships work, there is something worth to fight for..

[theacefospades]

22. He might not but trust isn't the reason...

26. They can change but YOU cannot change them you can support them But cannot change them

28. I agree with you here. Loving yourself is not a good way to live life.

35. Yes it is. I knew a girl for 13 years. I dated others and she was always there. I took it for granted. Not anymore. I love ya jules.

39. It's his job. Expecting him to do it ain't wrong.

[theacefospades]

To bersaba.

1. absolutely nothing "Abide these faith hope love. but the greatest of these is love"

3. If it's not clear it's not worth pursuing

4. Many but second guessing yourself is worse

8. she said etc. Whatever you have faith in be it the Evolution cycle or God Almighty

12. Then it's not dumping. It's leaving.

15. Nobody will ever be too busy. If you care you will find time. If you care you will guard the number with your life.

18. A man respects a woman even when she acts like a dog

[DocClassic]

12 13 and 39 are f***ed up but most of them are pretty good. 12 is so extremely untrue and is entirely contradicted by number 13. so if I'm with a chick and I feel the need to move across the nation for my own happiness but for some reason she is obligated to stay here, its not that I don't want her, its that I need to move away for my own happiness. however, if everyone really took 13 to heart, the world would be horrible.

[candlewax]

The first four great examples of the most common mistakes women make for men in relationships. If you notice that in most relationship forums, you hear the women ignoring her intuition/ the signs, making excuses for the guy, and accepting crumbs of attention and being strung along because they do NOT pay attention to the signs that he's not really into her. It's sad that a lot of women settle and cling on to a guy who they have to struggle to keep around. So a list like this is a must for many

[candlewax]

As jacksparrow55 has proven, a guy wouldn't really understand this list and view it in the skewed manner like he has because he's not under the same influences and pressures in society that women are under. Generally, this list is basically saying to expect more respect for yourself. Too many women are guilty of doing the opposite of this list and a lot has to do with outside societal factors and upbringing. Tons of conflicting ideas and women just tend to go with it and it's mostly wrong.

[kandy_canelane]

31.You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you. A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. Look for someone complimentary, not supplementary.

I say this to my friends all the time! Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels that way. How can you give of yourself to the other person, if your not a complete individual with something to give?

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Totally agree Enchanted, you need to be able to stand on your own two feet in this world and it's good to have others to hang out with and whatnot. But ya, doesn't mean the girl/guy you end up with can't just make you feel truly complete and matter most :P

[Enchanted_x3]

Atrager - I don't know that I agree with such a pessimistic outlook.

TheGodEmpererLeto - I can see your point, but I'm just trying to stress that you need a support system other than your signifcant other, so that God forbid, s/he leaves, you can pick up the pieces.

[aster]

oh god 31 - THANK YOU. I don't understand why people can't get this. life is so much easier when you face it as a TEAM. To think that someone is going to fix you or complete you is absurd. If you can't even do a little bit for yourself why should anyone else?

[Enchanted_x3]

panjanna - I can see why you think #3 is a bit harsh but what I'm getting at is that if you can tell someone is unkind, disrespectful or rude by how they interact with people (strangers, waiters, even family and friends) you need to recognize he'll treat you the same way.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Aw, wanted to give a nice long commentary to the 5 or so points I don't entirely agree with :( stupid article comments only being 500 characters long. Wish it'd be 5000 like when answering a question.

Well boo. Ah well, just ask if you want to know my comments on the 5 I disagree with (anyone). I'll send a message cause I am curious what others think about it.

[Enchanted_x3]

Because you can't truly love someone in a romantic capacity until you love yourself. Because you aren't complete to begin with. And I still think 15 is right. It doesn't have to mean call in the literal sense, but if he's not making an effort he's not interested...

[Enchanted_x3]

I worried 39 would come off too literal. I think you know I'm very big on respect and not being a doormat, so the opening the door thing is more of a metaphor for him showing you respect. Not necessarily a woman standing there, waiting for the guy to open the door for her. I don't believe in that kind of prissy attitude at all.

[ArtistBboy]

30-32, 35, 40 are all great.. 39 is highly debatable. If a woman says to me: "Get the door" I'll tell her to get her bags.. If she flirtatiously suggests that men are supposed to open the door for a lady, then I may comply.. But if she just stands there expecting me to open the door, I'll wait.. So you have to be careful in how you use your words.

Great article, loved the read.

[cameltoe]

Certainly #35 works for you and many other ladies also. Playing the coquette successfully requires talent and experience. Unfortunately, most of us don't possess those skills. My posts are meant as alternative advice and caveats for less experienced girls and women. Sorry!

[lovely_girl]

Loooooooved it! Very helpful to me personally. You seem really great with advice I was hoping you would give me some...its a long story but its posted on here called Playing Around or Serious has three parts and a lot of updates...(Anyone else that can give me advice is free to too) thanx:)