Women, do you find self pity attractive?

[Anonymous]

If you find him physically attractive but he puts off a huge self pity vibe. Would you still find him attractive? Or would the self pity be a complete turn off?

Updates

+1 y

Ladies, keep the opinions coming. The more the better to get the point across. I'm really hoping he sees this.

[riskygal]

Self pitty for manipulation is so fucked up... But, what you do if the person low self esteem is true, and you wanna be there. What if a person has depression issues and look to you to be there? Besides how would you be able to tell the difference? Between a real case of depression or manipulation?

[Kingsfan05]

Well this post is about me and im diagnosed with depression

[riskygal]

And I figured so, what makes you believe negative insults will help? You think the more people say a situation is needy and desperate it's gonna magically dissappear, and you're cured. I feel like this if you've found someone to care then let them. Doesn't matter how outrageous a scenario is. What's more pathetic is a lack of empathy towards another human if the person deserves it.

[Asker]

Not insults, reality. If you don't want to be overweight, do something about it. So on and so forth. What you speak of is enabling. There is nothing wrong with being there for someone. However, if a person refuses to do anything to better their situation, how are you helping by encouraging them to stay stuck. No one can fix another, only they themselves can make an improvement.

[enigmatta]

Nope. I don't like guys who brag about themselves and have an inflated ego, but I also don't think having a self pity vibe is any positive to the image others get of you. I'd say be confident in your body language and that's the most attractive you can get.

[Anonymous]

uhh no.. if you feel bad for yourself, get up and do something about it... be a man. in my opinion its not attractive.

[Anonymous]

You are 30 and asking this...

I am severely disappointed in whoever taught you about courtship.

[Asker]

It's to prove a point to an incredible stubborn individual.

[CasaNorba]

i know a few women that dont. and i dont blame them

[shewolf16]

complete turn off. so turned off i die inside a little.

[Lyndsielee666]

Definitely a turn off.
Good thing my boyfriend knows he's cute

[Kingsfan05]

How arrogant of him

[Lyndsielee666]

It's not arrogant if it's true (;

[FireInMyHead]

Self pity is fucked up and a 100% turn off.

[LAD323]

Not manly at all... Rather emasculating.

[Kingsfan05]

Whats wrong with a man having feelings

[Asker]

Nothing, as long as he doesn't use them all on himself.

[LAD323]

It's not about not having feelings, it's about being resilient and being a man.

[Kingsfan05]

Why would you post this about me? Very cruel

[Asker]

I never said it was about you. It's about how self pity will ruin anything good you have going.

[Kingsfan05]

Yes it is about me. You sent me the link..

[Kingsfan05]

And by the way I have nothing good going

[Asker]

That's pity again. Listen to people on here. You automatically get defensive and block out what others say. Pity will keep you locked in. Drop it, realize that bad shit happens to others as well, you are not unique in your dating problems. But if all you want to do is sit there and whine and throw a pity party. Then NOTHING will change. Only you can improve your life. Buck up.

[Anonymous]

Not at all