Do girls get turned off because the guy she is dating has a low number? Yes, previous sex encounter numbers?

[Anonymous]

I'm turning 29, I have a decent amount of girlfriends or dates, like 7-8? However only the last 2 are serious relationship material. Everyone before that, we did everything but sex.

I am just not that kind, if I do not think she is worth it, or if I do not like her enough to know that we will last the long run, I do not wana get myself into a situation where there is a possibility that I may get her pregnant...

My number is low, like 3. 2 with the serious relationship ladies, and 1 with an exotic fling. She was Black-Japanese, lip ring, tattoos.

So my question is , do Girl feel like that they want to date a guy that have had "done" many other girls like 20-100 by the time he is 30?

My current gf knows of my low number, and it almost seems like she's alittle disappointed... and she talks about her other female friend's bf who is 30 and has done 100 over girls.

Is it something like girls like a "ex-bad boy" and she finally found the guy that she thinks that he has done and tasted all the fishes in the sea, and now he finally knows what he wants and decides to settle down with you? Does that make you feel like you are more treasured and valuable? Like a sex / girl expert has finally found the most desirable woman, and she is You?

Are nice guys no longer desirable anymore?

It really seems so, and its not like a conscious thought, almost like a primitive mind reflex.

Updates

+1 y

I need more girls to respond to this...

[lostparadisex]

The more girls before me the more turned off. I don't think you need to have slept with anyone at all to be more desirable, you can be a virgin and still be desirable to me. I accept that some people choose the sleep around and if I really like a guy I'd probably look past, ensuring he has a clean bill of health etc. but I'd certainly be wary of the fact he's had lots of sex.. some girls might like experienced guys but I think there's a difference between experience and having sex with over 100 girls.

[MissChickMia]

I think your worth it. I think it's more of a turn off rather than a turn off. It's stating your not a man whore and doesn't have sex with everything with walking legs and boobs. If this girl you like brags a lot then maybe she should find a guy like that, instead of complaining and don't know what she has in front of her

[VampyreYukina14]

The only thing I see wrong with dating a guy that has had a lot of sexual partners is the risk that he has a STD. I would rather be with a man who has had fewer sexual partners. My fiancee was only with 3 before me and it makes me, personally feel more comfortable.

[Asker]

I'm more concerned to find out the effects on girl's mindset. Let's just assume he has no STDs, total clean bill of health, and you know it for sure, because he loves you, tells you the truth, and he went to the doctor's with you, and the doctor gave him the thumbs up.

Let's just say if your Man had been with 50 other girls before you, but he clearly is really in love with you, how would you feel or think? Refer to the main post on the details :) Thanks, it will help me a lot if you can provide me with your feedback... cheers

[VampyreYukina14]

As far as mindset, the more girls a guy has been with, even if he is clearly in love with you, it kind of makes us feel a little awkward, especially if he's been with more people than she has. The emotional center of our brain compares us to all of the previous women and makes us feel a bit inadequate. The thoughts "what did all they have that I didn't, why did he have to sleep with so many of them before me." Women's minds are strange.
Though reverse the rolls here. If she had been with more people then him, he would feel a bit insecure about her sexuality, and probably do the same thing.
Its true that we shouldn't think like that, and that we need to think about it in terms of "I have more than all the other girls because he's with me now and he loves me." instead, but we don't and it tends to bring out the jealous side of us more.

[Asker]

Trust me. I think the same too. My number is 3, hers is 7, and she once did it with a guy that already has a girlfriend... and she still considers him a friend even after they broke off... guess how this makes me feel... a huge part of me wants me to tell her to sever all relations with this guy, if not I will not be comfortable ever even if we continue...

However, I am afraid she will lose confidence in our relationship if I resort to such drastic measures. i feel that if I do ask that of her, the cons and repercussions will outweigh the pros...

[Supertriston]

I'm 17, still a Virgin, but some girl's DO get turned off by you never having a girlfriend... But the girl's I would go for, personally, are the girl's where that doesn't matter it's just the you inside that matters to them they are the ones that last longer. Some girl's like "Bad Boy's" but MOST GIRL'S LIKE THAT are really sl*tty.

[jakemiller1230]

I've never had a gf and am a virgin. I'm 20 and my female friends awlays say they wish appreciate me not talking with my d*ck all of the time and want to find a guy like me to marry. Were just friends so I mean I take it as a compliment and go with the flow but

[Asker]

I hope that is true, but getting married is one thing. I want to be desirable, even if to a partner that deem fit for me to be marriageable quality. I hope your lady friends are not only saying that to be nice to you...

[jakemiller1230]

But it sorta give you the friendzoned for life feeling so it has its advantages and disadvantages.

[jakemiller1230]

They could be I don't know but it's not likely I'll get married any time soon or ever for that matter so its whatever.

[Asker]

Yea dude. unless you are fine with your situation, I think its always better to teeter on the fence that they are secretly thinking of getting to know you better and into your pants... you need that XP before you hit the real streets

[jakemiller1230]

I am not the type of guy to approach a girl so they take me as no threat. Plus unless I really like a girl I don't plan on even considering anything besides talking cause I have trust issues.

[Asker]

Word. You handle your stuff in your own terms, its all cool.

I am definitely not the most attractive guy there, and I am a big guy, 6" 1, >240lb at least.

However, all the ladies I've ever dated, all wants to get into bed with me so bad, and sometimes it baffles me. But then again, there's plenty of other ladies that I am attracted to are just not into me..

[thetundrawolf]

No girl will ever, ever find a high number of previous lays a turn- on. Women do not work like this, only some men do.

For men and women, a low number is better.

[ittybittyninjapanda]

I think its a good thing that you haven't had sex a lot of times. I would be kind of wary if the guy had sex like 100 times. He would need to get tested. In my opinion having sex that many times is a huge turn off.

[Asker]

I had sex more than 100 times, just with the same lady lol

[ittybittyninjapanda]

Well if it was with the same lady that's ok, but I meant with like a hundred different women

[Asker]

Nah.. I ain't that good looking, glib-tongued, or rich to attract random 100 other girls, but I am all that enough for 1 girl :) It is also really tiring to be that heartless to 100 human beings, when 1 is more than I can handle...

[laramills23]

I'd prefer it of they hadn't had a lot of sex. My boyfriend is also 21 and he's had 15 sexual partners :/ that's the one thing I dislike about him.

[laramills23]

Sorry 29, not 21

[Asker]

One thing I realize, never tell your real number, be it a low or high one... If its low, tell a higher number, if its too high, drop to a more modest number... If you say 7, maybe it ain't that bad.

High enough to be desirable, low enough to not be a whore lol

[laramills23]

I disagree. Why not just be truthful. If i found out he lies to me about his number then I'd question the relationship!

[Asker]

I am truthful, and I want to be, but I think its best if the question was never asked ever. knowing the number does the relationship no good. but humans are curious beings... and I can accept if she had many serious relationship before me, and made love to them, its all justified. however fuking a date even if you do not really like the person, for me is quite a whore-ish and slutty thing to do... and of all the guys she told me she did, she was very honest to me, maybe too honest, of 7, 2 of hers I felt really icky about... she can fuck a guy she clearly do not like, which is gross to me... i will never fuck a girl I never feel a liking to, number 2, she can fuck a guy that currently is in a relationship... and continue do so... ughhhhh... and she still regards him as a friend to this day...

[kheserthorpe]

Some girls with a moderately high number feel more comfortable with a high number guy.

Some don't care.

[Asker]

her number is pretty high for me. I'm her 7th, and she is just easy, not in a whore-ish way, but if a guy tries to woo her and goes out on dates with her for a month, she'll let it happen if she likes him enough... and that for me, its a little too loose in terms of standards

[poppunk]

I'd prefer it that he hasn't slept with anyone at all but im planning to wait until im married so...

[Asker]

Thanks for responding regardless. I need the other part of the female population that can relate to this though...

[Ginjaninja22]

No. If you have been sexual with a bunch of girls my biggest concern would be to get you tested.

[Asker]

Getting tested is 1 issue. However, my question is just to find out if statistically if ladies prefer or desire a Man, in a serious relationship, to have had many other ex-encounters to show his sexual prowess and desirability.

[Ginjaninja22]

It depends on the girl. Personally if you were clean and not a notorious cheater or heart breaker I would overlook maybe the few girls you've mingled with. If you've banged every girl in your county and three neighboring ones I'd probably be skeptical on whether you are seriously looking for love.

[Ginjaninja22]

I think you need a different girl. Waiting for love is a good decision. Why even attempt a relationship if you see nothing but a hookup. We are humans with emotions not animals who have sex just to survive and that's it. Sex should be something of much deeper Meaning to humans and if she thinks your number is low I can tell you now her personality is shallow.

[Asker]

She loves me alot. I'm probably like the 7th or 8th guy she has dated, and I'm the first boyfriend she has ever said "i love you " to, and thats a big deal. she's korean, and she has introduced me to her closest friends and sister, brother in law. She is also mentioned about me meeting her parents. I just think that if my number was higher, like 8-10, she'd probably think I was more like a normal guy, with a history that she can heal or whatever, rather than a "boring" guy thats ever really probed 2 others other than herself.

[Anonymous]

I would rather be with a guy such as yourself I would feel as if I were more valued and adored because of the fact you are not looking just to put a notch in your belt so to speak.

[Asker]

My gf thinks I'm weird... because 1) I am 29 and only had 3 sexual partners, and i broke the V only when I was 23... 2) She thinks I'm weird because before 23, I had like 3 other girlfriends, however I did not really like them, it was more for being with for fun, and I declined sex with all of them, no matter how much they threw themselves at me. Reason being, I wasn't into them enough to want to have sex with them, and I didn't want to be stuck in a situation where there was plausible claim that I got them pregnant...

[Opinion Owner]

You sound a lot like my bf he is 24 dated 5 girls but only had sex with two and he said it just didn't feel right so I do feel lucky because I was his second and I don't have to worry as much as I would other wise with stds and him cheating sexually. I would rather not be with a man whore.

[Asker]

www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1090399-ladies-how-should-i-feel-my-gf-used-to-date-have-sexual

Tell me what you think. This is my post too.

[Anonymous]

Yuck, your girl is nasty. If she told you her number is low, she's a liar!
Who really wants used up, shared out, dirty dicks, when there are cleaner ones like you around, and some even cleaner.

[Asker]

Sometimes I feel like she is conflicted, like most other girls, they want to heal and settle down with a bad-boy veteran, to show that they can tame the wild, like they are special or something, and then they want that same guy to be nice and loyal.

However, when they get a brand-new stock that is nice and loyal out of the box, its almost too easy, and they lose interest fast.

I like that part when you say "when there are cleaner ones like you around, and some even cleaner." ... lol its funny you try to take a shot at my less clean penis.

Its fine, and I think I'm pretty decent, probably 8 lips touched it, and 3 vaginas felt it, and I think I'm a decent guy, way more decent that your average club go-er, play boy, one night stand cassanova.

[Opinion Owner]

No, you are a good boy lol. It's nice to see there are still some.
I don't know why guys think so many girls are so into bad boys. These are certain types of girls, a lot of types of girls really wouldn't want a bad boy. Look at my answer and others to, there's already a couple girls saying they don't want a dick everybody else already has.
If you're clean, why would you want dirty in you? You've kept yourself clean for a reason, then some dirty guys gonna come along... na I don't think so. All that stuff about bad boys is rumours, it's probably made up by those guys who are doormats but think they are nice guys.

Birds of a feather flock together. Girls, well alot, don't want somebody who's been around the block 5 times and back.

a lot of girls only even settle down with their bad boy because they don't want everybody to say "I told you so" so they pretend everythings good.

[Asker]

Lol I joked with my girl, I told her, "you wish my numbers were higher? that's cool, I'll go bump it up twice a week when I don't see you, and in 1 year, I will hit exactly 100 and have 2 weeks to spare... :) *cheeky smile* " lolol and her response was " you want to die? I'll kill you and then kill myself..." lolol.

I feel conflicted sometimes. I even feel like if this r/s don't work out for me, its bye bye Mr. nice guy, and I'm just gona be the guy that goes around bars working the ladies and go into depression and getting my numbers up to 100 in 4 months or something...

[Opinion Owner]

Na, it's better to be the nice guy, definitely. If you turn into an asshole, when you meet a really nice girl, she won't like you because you're a prick.
Lol you know you can't mess with you girl haha, good for her.

If she really had it how she's saying, she wouldn't like it though. Why would she want to know there's been 100 vags wrapped round you before she was. You would probably have to wear a condom with her forever.

100 in 4 months smh, you want genital warts?

[Asker]

Well, if I'm in depression, I don't think I will care anymore... coz I care so much for this girl I'm with now... if shit goes down, I'll be messed up for real.

[Opinion Owner]

Happiness can't be based on anybody but yourself

[Asker]

Yeap, I've been through a little bit to know that, but it will help so much if someone else can lighten the load. But I know not to trust anyone else but yourself, even though the person you trusted the most can turn around and leave you, because everyone is selfish, everyone.

[Opinion Owner]

Not everybody, just 99.9% of the human population lol.
I know what you mean about lighten the load though.
Have you even tried having a proper talk with her?

[Encolpius]

As a virgin myself, I worried about that until I found my girlfriend, who is also a virgin. You should probably stick to women who are closer to your own number if it bothers you too much.

[Asker]

It'll be weird to ask about numbers before really getting to know them... lol

[Encolpius]

Well, that is true.

[TheNewClassic]

It would make me like you even more.

[Asker]

being a nice guy or a guy with 100 ex-sexual partners before age 30?

[TheNewClassic]

Being a nice guy that hasn't had 100000 chicks before me and takes relationships seriously.

[Asker]

Thanks... I know you're just a total stranger, but it means something when you ladies don't make me feel like I'm the weird one...