Trust stepdad with puberty questions?

[Anonymous]

so I love with my stepdad, and his two sons who are twins and we are all in the same grade... all my friends talk about how they went bra shopping with their moms or got stuff for their periods with their mom. I want to have those experiences but my sources are limited. Should I ask my stepdad to give me "a talk?" And take me bra shopping? He's totally nice, it's just I'm scared my brothers will tell everyone I need a bra and got my period, especially since there friends with boys and my crush in our grade... help?

[514acmb]

Hey girl! I totally understand you on the whole, I don't want my stepbrothers, the same age as me knowing. My parents died when I was 3 in an incident and since all my extended family is not available, I moved in with my next-door neighbors. They are my best friends, but theyre triplet boys in my grade at school. Their parents are now my legal guardians (I call them mom and dad even though they aren't technically) and so they take care of me, including bra shopping and period issues and supplies. When I first asked mom for a bra, it was awkward because she came home and told the boys at dinner (ack!) But honestly, it wasn't that bad! And relating to periods, every girl gets it and letting the guys in your life in on it, is okay. The first time I got my period, I told Alex, Chris and Ben because it made me more comfortable knowing that they knew what I would be going through each month. It's normal to be embarrassed but it gets easier to talk about! Guys are more understanding with helping you cope with stuff like periods when they have a better understanding of what you're going through. I know what you mean by feeling left out with the experiences your friends are going through. It just isn't the same having somebody else's parents or not your real parents take you shopping for those big milestones. Plus if your stepbrothers tell everyone you need a bra or got your period, just try to shrug it off because EVERY girl eventually needs a bra and gets her period. Just tell them to grow up if they tell everyone.

[Asker]

Wow! It feels so good to know we can relate to each other! thanks so much for ur answer too! I'll follow u and then maybe when we get to level two, we can message?

[514acmb]

For sure!!

[Asker]

How'd u ask ur mom for a bra? I need some tips on how to ask my stepdad...

[514acmb]

We were at target one day clothes shopping cause I had grown aa bunch and I kinda wandered off into the bra section and the sales lady asked if I would like to try one on and I asked my mom and she said yes, and then we bought it

[Asker]

thanks so much for ur help!

[Zendrya]

Why would it matter if people knew you have your period and wear a bra? It's something totally natural and healthy and everyone will know you have it eventually.

[Asker]

Well they're my step brothers, so it's weird cuz I see them a lot and I don't want them to see me weirdly

[Zendrya]

They won't... it's totally normal

[CheerGirl38139]

I've had some very similar experiencesituation but I have an awesome stepdad that I have a great relationship with

[Intraluminal]

My daughter lives with me, so I can empathize. It is going to be difficult for both of you to have this conversation. Talk to him about your fears FIRST. If I were he, I would see if I could find a older woman who could discuss the things you need to talk about with you, and then he could take you shopping. I would also recommend that for your first bra you go to a store that sells nothing but bras, so a saleslady can help you get fitted CORRECTLY. I am sure that if you ask him to be discrete, he will be, if he's as nice as you say.

If I may say so, it's VERY unusual for a girl to be placed with her step-father. How did that come to be?

[Asker]

Well, my dad passed away in a car accident years ago, so my mom married this awesome guy, my stepdad, and now I live with him, and my two step brothers in my grade. But my mom passed of cancer a year ago, so now it's me w the boys

[Asker]

thanks by the way

[Intraluminal]

I am so sorry about your losses, I can not say. I am glad that you have come through it with a close, loving family. You sound like a very level-headed girl, and I know you will do well. Since your stepdad is so cool, I'm sure that, after he dies of embarrassment, he will make sure you get the help you need. Please understand, that was a joke. He's an adult and women's' needs are not a mystery to him or a cause of embarrassment, I'm sure. Best of luck!

[Asker]

Ahahaha thx! I men, it's kinda cool to b the only girl, I mean they treat me so well, but they get overprotective when I asked to have a boy over😁😂

[Intraluminal]

Then they're doing what they're supposed to do. Good for them. Have a good night.

[Asker]

Haha it's good and bad, I guess (for me haha), thanks, u too!

[Anonymous]

i'd be happy if my step daughter felt okay asking me, but i would totally understand if not, and i'd even be willing to find a woman friend who she's comfortable with to talk to her too or shop with her if she wishes...

[NormanKemp]

Yes that's ok. I'm sure he would love the being a dad part of it all. But it all comes down to trust and so far he has done a great job why question your trust in him now?

[AbigailJC]

Do you have any female relatives you could ask?

[Asker]

My grandparents live states away, and no one else is in state pretty much. Just my stepdad...(my parents are both passed), did u ever talk to ur dad bout this stuff? What'd he react like?

[AbigailJC]

I don't know my dad, so I don't really know, you can always ask me if you like. I know it's hardly your parents but it might help!

[Asker]

thanks sooooooo soooooo much! If I have any questions later on, I'll totally ask u! But I need to find the courage to ask for a bra... how'd u ask for one?

[Asker]

Wanna private message me? We can talk? I'll follow u and maybe u can start a message?

[AbigailJC]

I got my sister to buy one for me. How old are you honey?

[AbigailJC]

Sure, follow me :)

[Asker]

Thx!

[AbigailJC]

Let me know when you've followed :)

[Asker]

Pretty sure I did, did u get it?

[jacquesvol]

He'll understand it. What about mom or aunt?

[Asker]

My parents are both passed away, so it's just me and stepdad and stepbrothers. Family is out of state, if u had/have a daughter would u take her out for 'stuff'?

[jacquesvol]

I certainly would! Periods are 100% normal. Bras too are.
And if the neighbors' daughter asked me, I'd help her out too.
Or I'd ask my wife to help. :)

[apple24]

If you feel comfortable talking to him than yeah!