Why do women prefer effeminate men over masculine men?

[Anonymous]

[ksoma]

I saw a really interesting survey.
women in a third world country and women in a first world country were both shown pictures of the same two guys. A manly guy and a pretty boy. And they were asked which the would rather have as a boyfriend or husband.

1st world women answers tended towards the pretty boy. not universally, but a clear majority.
3rd world women answers tended towards the manlier guy, again, not universally, but a very clear majority.

Though the results are not conclusive, the theory behind the results is this:
3rd world women look for a man who looks like he can work hard, and provide for her and her children. food, shelter, and safety are her priorities, and she wants a mate who will best meet those things.

In the first world, these priorities simply do not have the same weight behind them. Women do not need to look for a man who can do the hard labor to ensure food is on the table. even if she depends on him as a provider, he can be small and meek and still work a job that brings in a great deal of money. Thus, the theory goes, 1st world women are looking more for someone they find physically attractive, rather than physically capable. Manly guys are built for work, not for looks. In fact, it it women who are designed, by God or nature, to be the beautiful gender. Thus, guys who fall more into the "physically appealing" range over the "physically capable" range, are seen as effeminate, because they may have features that are generally associated with women, as they are features that accent physical attractiveness.

In short, the feminine is beautiful, and 1st world women, who do not need strong, powerful men, but are still straight, look for men with beautiful (feminine) qualities.

[ColinHarvey]

This is dumb. Women don't want hairspray and lipbalm boyfriends or roidrage constructon workers.

They want HOT boyfriends.

[ksoma]

@ColinHarvey sure. all women want those things you think they want. aside from the ones who were interviewed for a scientific survey, of course.

Because in Bumfuckistan, the woman who is 24 and looks like she is going on 48 cares more that her boyfriend is HOT, more than that he looks like he could protect her and her children, or work a 12 hour day in the field so they have food to eat. Nah, fuck that necessity shit, she wants him HOT.

[ColinHarvey]

To be fair, in a third world country women don't have much of a say. Not a whole lot of dating going on in Kenya.

According this moronic survey of fifteen women or whatever, men are planting corn and protecting children from the cartel with their muscle and beards

[Intraluminal]

I used to believe that women would prefer feminine men but as I got older I found that it wasn't true for MOST women. Interestingly a lesbian recently wrote a book where she passed as a guy. She also believed going in that that's what women wanted, but she later said in her book that almost all of the women she dated preferred masculine men.

[Anonymous]

No matter what overly aggressive testosterone saturated roid-rage guys will always be HUGE a turn-off. I'd rather have someone normal without a temper who I won't have to babysit just so he won't get into a fight. Went on one date with a guy like that, and it was exhausting! Like following around a toddler who could throw a tantrum any second, he fought with another guy outside the restaurant and I hopped in a cab without him I was too embarrassed to stay and deal with it. He said he understood why I left but there was no second date after that! I think somewhere in the middle is ideal since humans all need a mixture of testosterone and estrogen to stay healthy and balanced, when one hormone completely overtakes the other it's not good!

[FakeName123]

I fail to see how being masculine equals "roid-rage", having a temper and getting constantly into fights.

What you are describing is the very opposite extreme of effiminate.

[Kylesar]

@FakeName123 She's using the feminist version of masculine

[Opinion Owner]

@Kylesar He said effeminate which is an extreme so I assumed he was only talking about extremes, but sure continue the feminist witch hunt if yu have nothing better to do.

[ChaosKilledTheDinos]

This is such a vague and generalized question it's impossible to answer. What are feminine and masculine qualities (they vary by culture, location, and age). Just a very problematic and impossible to answer question.

I guess being kind and compassionate is generally seen as feminine, and I like that in guys. I like it because it makes you a decent person and probably shouldn't be expressly feminine.

[MapleFairy]

I'm not sure if it's most, but I definitely prefer more feminine men. It could be because I identify with men who have similar interests to my own, such as fashion or crafts. It also has to do with personality- some personalities find feminine men more physically attractive as well. Flippy hair, longer hair, yeah I love all that. I also love guys with tattoos lol.

[Dulcedulcexoxo]

Would you date a guy who is androgynous (gender fluid )? Just curious, because I've noticed women who like feminine men are sometimes into gender fluid men

[MapleFairy]

@Dulcedulcexoxo Yeah I totally would! I think crossdressing is cool, cuz it's bending the boundaries. If I had someone to do it with I would probably crossdress too, just for the fun of it.

[fauchelevent]

Ehh, I mean, I guess you could say I like feminine men? The boyfriend's hair is down to the small of his back, though I wouldn't say he is a feminine person. I guess it's less about feminine men vs masculine men and more about which guy is confident enough to look how he wants and not give a shit what anyone thinks. That's attractive to me.

[FakeName123]

Its an interplay. The more masculine women get, the more effiminate men get and vice versa. Unfortunately the lack of complementing each other, but rather being the "same" and competing with each other is a big issue for many relationships.

https://www.mostlyodd.com/death-by-utopia/

[bombamboum]

That isn't true. That might be the case for teenage girls but when you look at adults, most women are into manly men.

[oldanddecrepid]

that is a load of BS... women prefer men who make an effort, most really masculine guys are to macho sometimes to realize they have to be a little tender with their women.

[becca123]

Would love to know what research study was used to formulate this question?

Most (obviously not all) women like masculine men.

[SunsetRose]

I like a man who looks like a man. However, I do appreciate some "feminine" qualities in a man, such as expressing emotion and the ability to listen.

[CoolSky01]

Teenage girls like pretty boys , if you're hot they're into you even if you're girly however the older chicks, mainly when they're over 18 prefer manly men for obvious reasons.

[Almostragan]

I don't lol. I like guys who are really masculine. Maybe some girls like guys they aren't as intimidated by or who are more relatable.

[ElissaDido]

I prefer Masculine men BY FAR <3 One of my biggest turn on is Virility!

[Transigence]

If you speak in generalities, they don't. Women generally want violent bruisers who are emotionally stunted and easy to control.

[Anonymous]

Too many people seem to think "masculine" means loud, obnoxious, indifferent to other people and their needs/wishes and pushy to get his own way. What's she get out of a relationship with an oaf?

[Dulcedulcexoxo]

I like a mix, more masculine than feminine. But I do not like feminine men, just not my thing.

[LifeEqualsLove]

No.

I like a man to be like a man.

As for the others, they want a shopping buddy lol

[Jersey2]

They don't. Mom's make effeminate boys and the next generation of females rejects them. Funny in a way.

[COCOCHANEL]

people have remarked that the men i like appear feminine but i don't see it. they look obviously like men to me.

[IceEverest]

In India I have observed this but in general its totally opposite in most cases. Women prefer masculine manly men.

[Anonymous]

I don't. I prefer masculine men. I'd rather be the feminine one.

[rgb008]

That is not true at all haha.

[anymours23]

Actually that is true for college and high school girls.

[Anonymous]

Huh? Can't say I've noticed that... only noticed that women seem to prefer manly men

[Mesonfielde]

Because that's what they like

[mystique253]

That's a lie.
Men need to be men not women.

[BertMacklinFBI]

preferences

[ConsultantIsBack]

Womanly women need a manly man nomsayin?

[Anonymous]

Somewhere in the middle is ideal.

[Kylesar]

Women aren't turned on by effeminate men though

[Anonymous]

Not true.

[dominiquois]

We don't

[This_is_my_username]

I don't

[love-jesus]

not true

[ThatBritishLad]

Since when?

[forthecauzz]

who says they do?

[TheOldMan59]

Er, they don't.